Missing the friends left behind (page 2)

sass_my_frass

Yes that's true. I miss only one I think. She's in a situation that would cost her a marriage and children if she were to be true to her better judgment, or maybe not; maybe she judges me too. In that case, she was never a real friend in the first place.

tijkmo

i miss them like hell...and i've never been afraid to say so

ultimately it wasnt my decision to stop having them as friends..it was their decision..when i was eventually reinstated i went to see them all..and there were lots of them..they didnt want to know me

Back in your own country
Nothing seems the same
No one comes around at night
Or uses your new name

Hearing silent whispers
Old friends are acting strange
No one wants to know you now
People say you've changed

Holidays in Eden
Life before the fall
See no, hear no, speak no evil
Feel no guilt at all

Holidays in Eden
Paradise and light
Heaven loses you to this world
Leaves you alone
Kiss your home goodbye

tijkmo of the - its not the words of your enemies you remember ; it's the silence of your friends - class

purplesofa

tijkmo

You have a way with words.........thanks for sharing.

purps

tijkmo

ooops my bad....those were not mine..they are marillions..you can see why i like them so much...these however are mine

SILENT CONDEMNATION

WHILE YOU STAND AND SHAKE YOUR HEAD IN SILENT CONDEMNATION

BUT YOU NEVER EVER GAVE A THOUGHT TO LEND A HELPING HAND

LEAVING ME TORN BETWEEN THE DESIRE TO LET GO

AND THE NEED TO MAKE A STAND

TRIED TO BE THE BIGGER MAN HERE

BUT YOU MADE ME VERY SMALL INDEED

VERY SMALL INDEED

WANT TO FORGIVE YOU...NEEDING YOU TO ASK

KNOWING THAT YOU NEVER WILL

DIDN'T FALL FOR YOUR CHARMS BABY DIDN'T FALL FORYOUR CHARMS YOU WERE SADLY LACKING IN THAT DEPARTMENT ANY WAY FELL FOR YOUR PAIN AND YOU CAUSED MORE OF THAT THAN YOU CAN EVER KNOW

TRIED TO BE THE BIGGER MAN HERE

BUT YOU MADE ME VERY SMALL INDEED

VERY SMALL INDEED

WANT TO FORGIVE YOU...NEEDING YOU TO ASK

KNOWING THAT YOU NEVER WILL WHICH MAKES YOU EVEN SMALLER STILL

IT'S NOT THE WORDS OF ALL OUR ENEMIES THAT WE REMEMBER IT'S THE SILENCE OF OUR FRIENDS THE SILENCE OF OUR FRIENDS TELL THE TRUTH YOU LOSERS TELL THE TRUTH FOR THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE

LOOK WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO YOUR SON MA

THEY SAID THAT THEY WOULD GET IT RIGHT

BOY DID THEY GET IT WRONG MA

AND LOOK WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO YOUR SON

sorry about the formatting

JT

what is amazing about this religion is how many of us will express how we Miss them, yet very few of the folks you may have pioneered with , worked on Hall project, or at the conventions will will speak of us in such terms-

they really don't miss us, they just think we are going to die real soon and be bird food.

it is this type of mental indoctrination that makes such groups as jw so dangerous-

when you consider, a person could have been "Best" friends 30yrs, and announcement is made they are DFEd- NEVER NEVER does the jw say:

"I know Sue, the bro must have made a mistake in her judical case, i have known her for 30yrs, let me go and ask her WHAT HAPPENED??"

folks not one jw every has that thought for the most part- this is why you know this is a cult

folks while we refer to them as "our Freinds" and we Pine and long for them, the fact is they never were our frineds once they started to parttake the WT poison

looking_glass

they really don't miss us

I don't believe that because if that were the case they would not get worked up about our departure.

There is only one chick who decided to do the tough love thing. We got into it when a friend who was in an abusive marriage cheated and got DF'd. I felt she was dealt w/ in an unloving way, the other JW chick said it was "jah's arrangement" and we got into an argument. We did not speak for years and then I stopped going altogether and one day I got a nasty gram from her. I called her up and told her to find a hobby and leave me alone. Years later I found out that she was very sick and I sent her a get well card. She got better, but I never heard from her. I know she keeps tabs on me thru other friends who tell me that she still asks about me (and they say glowing things about me and my life).

As for people who were left behind. Very few people have shunned me even though they know I am not a JW and have done a lot of things that would get me DF'd if the elders got a hold of me.

They miss us, but they are not allowed to show it.

Robdar

I miss my friends too. I also know that they miss me. I live hundreds of miles away from my home town. When I go home to visit family, I sometimes visit the ones I left behind. Nobody mentions the obvious. We visit and enjoy ourselves. Knock on wood, I've yet to be shunned by my former witness friends. Now my former "worldly" friends are a different matter, seems I pissed off a bunch of them before I left town.

Do not believe the ones who would tell you that all your JW friends had conditional love for you. Some of them did, to be sure. But the same can be said of the new friends that you make outside of the org.

acadian

Didn't leave any friends behind, they know where I live, my door is open, no regrets. So far none have come over, some friends? And when I see them and say Hi there's no responce. I didn't leave any friends. But I've noticed the kingdumb hall parking lot has fewer cars in it. Acadian of the, doors open, come on in class

cognizant dissident

Do not believe the ones who would tell you that all your JW friends had conditional love for you. Some of them did, to be sure. But the same can be said of the new friends that you make outside of the org.

There is a lot of truth in this Robdar. I believe unconditional love is for kittens and puppies and children. In the adult world, everyone has boundaries and lines in the sand, conditions if you will, that cannot be crossed or negative judgement will follow. If you had a dear, close friend who later turned out to be a murderer, or a rapist or who stole your money or worse, your spouse, would you still be their friend? Even most "worldly" people would not, although I grant you that there are some forgiving souls who might still love you and forgive you. Perhaps a mother or a spouse or a dear friend. It's just that everyone's boundaries are different, but they are still there. Jehovah's Witnesses have more conditions than most, that is true but even they are not all the same. Some will shun you for your perceived crimes without hesitation, some will still love you and find a way around it. This is just the way people are. You cannot paint them all with one brush.

Cog

misspeaches

I miss them. I loved them dearly and I know they loved me. I clearly remember what it was like being an active JW as well. You just didn't associate with the inactive ones. It wasn't done. It was frowned upon and had repercussions.

I had some very close friends that I worked with as well. Yesterday I happened to run into them. A married couple. The wife of the pair was friendly, you could tell she was not sure what to say or do (keep in mind I am not disphellowshipped or disassociated) but at least she exchanged pleasantries and where are you working now etc etc. Her husband on the other hand gave me a look of pure venom/hate. He would not acknowledge me and made it clear I was being shunned.

Part of me cries inside for what we had and have no longer. For all those memories shoved away.

Part of me feels angry and betrayed because I thought I knew this guy and we were close but it turns out I didn't know him at all.

Part of me feels vindicated, my mum was there to witness it (mum is still very much a JW), I don't think she fully believed that her fellow JWs behaved like this but now she's seen it for herself.

Its all just too confusing.

Missing the friends left behind

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