The Elder then proceeded to empathise with my situation back then, and beings I was under great stress, if I had gone out drinking, got drunk, had a one-night stand, but was repentant and came forward right away, nothing but a good talking to would have happened and I would have then been scriptually free from the marriage as I would have commited adultery. I asked what would have happened had I did what I did, which was meeting my fiance and respecting myself and him as well by waiting for "relations" until I felt ready, which wasn't for about 6 months after we met, but I don't feel repentant over it, and I continue on with the relationship? He said, well, then I would have been disfellowshipped
Sad but true snarf. Incidentally, this was the very thing that made me come to my senses and say WTF???
j