On the one hand it's true that time flies. It doesn't seem two minutes since I first joined this site. On the other hand it feels like I've been here forever, accumulating about 15,000 posts in the process.
It was a Wednesday (12 September 2001) on a small island off the West coast of Scotland
In recent months I had experienced a spiritual awakening of such proportions that it caused me to question one after another of the beliefs that I'd been raised with as a JW. The only terms I knew of to explain the experience were concerned with the WTS doctrine about the "Anointed". By about late August of that year I was in no doubt that the bible (especially the gospel of John) was making claims about Deity that I had been oblivious to, before. The hardest part wasn't intellectual, but it was that *SNAP* that occurs as the mind suddenly grasps something. Having already met him; the comments of bible writers about a Nazarean Carpenter, with something special about him, finally fell into place with John 20:28.
My dilemma was that it was in contrast with my previous beliefs, and I clearly understood that it meant that my days as a JW were numbered. At this point I did something I had vowed five years previously I would never do, I used the Internet for religious reasons. I had sworn off it shortly after first connecting to the Internet in 1995, as I'd stumbled across a vitriolic anti-JW website. I had a bit of trepidation concerning what I would find this time around.
I came across an article by Randy Watters entitled "The Cockroach Who Became a Man". It resonated with me, and I started corresponding with Randy. The weekend before 911 I found and started lurking here. 911 hit, and I registered the very next day. The following day (13th) I was on a road trip, far from home and devastated by world conditions, but not once thinking it was the end of the world. I have to confess that I had a hard time praying, though. I felt like God had better things to be concerning himself with than some poor wretch who was feeling beat up about a few thousand people he'd never met. Empathy is a biatch, though, and I acutely felt the anguish of a worldwide ricochet from the events of the day previous
It was a hard period of time as emotions were running high for all of us. Further, I was finally finding out information about the WTS that I hadn't even dreamed of. I knew I would have to leave for doctrinal reasons, but now it seemed that pretty much everything that I'd held true about them was false. Fortunately I was making some fast friends here, and the support was invaluable.
The last nail in the coffin was ironically the Trinity Brochure, but not for any doctrinal reasons. I had previously considered that the WTS might be a little misguided, but now I had clear evidence that they were scholastically dishonest. I read "Exposed 'Should You Believe the Trinity?'", as a well documented brochure showing all the references used in the WTS Trinity brochure, and how they are often taken completely out of context to say what they want them to say. My last illusion was in tatters
The UN thing exploded in the October, but nothing surprised me anymore. It was just one more "thing" in a litany of lies, deceit, and hypocrisies.
Towards the end of the year I started making friends outside of the Hall, in preparation from my departure. The first Sunday of 2002 (January 6th) I would be giving my last Public Talk, and I wanted to use the opportunity to say goodbye to a whole bunch of people who I loved dearly.
Time certainly flies, and it's been a rollercoaster of discovery...
...what exciting things are for the future? Time will tell
