I have a question(s)

by I.Wonder 33 Replies latest jw friends

  • I quit!
    I quit!

    Hi I Wonder,

    Nice to meet you. I feel bad that you and others here have to go through this. All I can say is take your time. Read what others have done and eventually you will be able to plan an escape route. (It is so odd speaking this way most people who don't have contact with the cults wouldn't even believe this sort of thing happens). As for counting time a lot of witness lie about what they do or figure out ways to count time by sticking magazines in laudromats and things like that. Also if you feel you have been put in a position where you are forced to peddlle lies what is wrong with lying about the time spend peddling those lies to those who are printing the lies. It seems like one big farce to me anyway.

    About this comment you made: "Jesus sent the apostles door to door, we also need to be doing the same"

    I know there are two scriptures they use but I can only remember one Acts 20:20. In context Paul was referring to himself going to the houses of other believers. This has nothing to do with going to strangers doors to convert them. These were more what I guess you would call sheparding calls.

    Welcome and good luck.

  • sspo
    sspo

    welcome

    Just do the minumun in service.

    40% of most publishers in every congregations i've attended are only averaging less than 5 hrs a month.

    You could be one of those and don't have to cope with it as much.

    When you're out make sure even when you place literature, just don't call back on them.

    if you are in the english speaking territory, i really would not worry much about bringing in anyone because hardly anyone is coming in and getting baptized.

    We have 12 pioneers in the cong. and very, very few studies among them.

    It's been years i've seen someone from the field getting to the point of baptism, some that get baptized they got so many problems that a good number of them just drop out once their "teacher" let's go of them.

  • DavidChristopher
    DavidChristopher

    I Wonder.

    Welcome to the board!

    Just ask a bunch of questions...and they will show their true intentions real quick...and they will expose themselves by persucuting and condemning you for wanting to learn more than they know...or claim to know.

    they want people to spend their entire lives just trying to get where they are in learning...not go beyond...and your questions will point out out your desire to do so very quickly.

    of course..this approach has many personal sacrifices that will make your life a living hell...but someone might see and follow you to freedom.

    It all amounts to..if you seek short-term happiness trading for long term misery...or you choose short-term sacrifices for long term happiness.

    if you are unhappy...everyday you spend there is time wasted.

    Hope this helps...

    My mom is still a devout witness.....yet she talks to me and tells me I am right about alot of things.

    don't give up on them....we may lose a few battles now and then...but the war is not over yet.

  • Zico
    Zico

    The presentation I like to use, is quite simply just to say 'Hi, I'm just in the neighbourhood leaving these magazines with people today, would you like to read them?' Most people say no, a few say yes, but I doubt they read them, and I don't care much if they do, as I don't bother with the return visit.

  • Mysterious
    Mysterious

    Tell him you've had female problems lately and had trouble getting out. Or say you are eager to try telephone witnessing and then simply mark in a sheet but don't call, or call and give an anti-witness instead ;) Check out your own territory, mark down some placements then shred a couple sets of magazines to correspond, and some not at homes, etc.

  • Gilberto
    Gilberto

    Welcome IWonder, I too was a long time lurker just joined.

    Firstly don't give up on your husband. My wife knew of some of my issues for years, we very rarely spoke about them (only if she brougt things up) and I would always avoid an argument. It was a long term exit plan to. In fact after she came out I showed her, in an old diary, my goals. One of them read "Allow xxxxx to see the truth about "the truth". She couldn't believe it!

    She thoroughly believed the truth even when she saw all the flaws.

    Don't feel bad about going on the ministry if you have to let people take responsibility for themselves. You have to focus on your mission which, I guess would be to get out with hubby and without losing family.

    I would work on a weekend (sorry, but it is an important contract etc.). I would "go out" during the week and report time and magazines. Once your hours have dropped, which it seems they are, you will be (probably are) labled as "weak". That is good because then not too much will be expected of you. The elder is just doing his job in trying to get you to go out with the group. He won't actually expect you to go out. IMO

    Anyway, call in when you can and let us know how things go. But remember it could be a long process and "keep your eyes on the prize".

  • TheListener
    TheListener

    Welcome I wonder.

    I was right where you are now not that long ago.

    I went out once a month. That seems just often enough to keep of the "let's bother the publishers" list. Hopefully that will also be enough to keep some peace with your husband. When I went in service I offered the tract "what do jehovah's witnesses believe" and offered to read a scripture. I would read something about Jesus and say how important it is to have faith in him and what his life and death meant for us. Trust me, I never got very far at all. Most people wouldn't even take the little tract much less let me read them a scripture.

    Good luck. The further out your mind becomes the more dificult it will be to force your body to go.

  • 24k
    24k
    It all amounts to..if you seek short-term happiness trading for long term misery...or you choose short-term sacrifices for long term happiness. if you are unhappy...everyday you spend there is time wasted. -- davidchristopher

    The above statement is so true. The only regret I have about leaving, is that I waited so long to do it. Some have been able to do the fading thing, but I found it excruciating. With so many dubs around you, it's unlikely that you'll be able to just fade away. The hardest part for me was that you basically have to hide everything about yourself, to maintain the facade of simply being weak.

  • Alligator Wisdom
    Alligator Wisdom
    So I was wondering if any of you on here are still "active" witnesses? How do you manage going out in field service? What do you say?

    Yes, I'm still active and participating in the public ministry. How do I do it?

    Love for Jehovah and what Jesus did for all human creation. Besides, I love the Bible's message and encourage my neighbors to read it. Now, if your next thought is regarding using publications provided by the WTS, then that's up to the situation or topic. Usually I don't highlight that at all. I stick to some upbuilding scriptures and ask them personal questions, such as which account in the Bible is their favorite and why? The point of my ministry is to point to the Bible as a source for much good in our lives.

    I get into great conversations without being preachy and have developed many nice relationships with my neighbors. They remember me and approach me when I see them around town.

    And welcome to JWD. Keep posting your thoughts and experiences. We all learn from each other here.

    Alligator Wisdom (aka Brother NOT Exerting Vigorously by WTS standards)

  • BrendaCloutier
    BrendaCloutier
    Many active JW's fudge their field service numbers, don't sweat turning in a few hours just to keep the elders off your back. No need to actually do anything. Is it lying? Well, yeah. But you're lying to a publishing house, a glorified book club. There are worse things you could do. :-)

    Welcome I.Wonder! Please to see you here.

    On the above comment by Brother AlmostAthiest, you'll note the appropriate use of Theocratic Warfare(tm). However, his grammar could use some work, and he didn't gesture enough for proper emphasis. <tongue firmly planted in cheek>

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