What do you tell your children about god or his lack of existance? I know I have a long time before I have to deal with this but my jw mom did ask me what I will teach my son about god. I have no plans to tell him god is real. I know he will have some exposure to Christianty because his father is a non practicing Christian and his parents are religious. "God" will not play a factor in our lives since I don't believe in a particular god. I know there may come a time he might want to go to church and explore and I will certainly enourage that. I've been thinking about this a lot lately for some reason. I've seen my brothers kids and my sister in law is a believer and they pray to Jesus and all that. My little nephew believes that god or angels will protect him and all that. I think believing that kind of stuff makes him feel safer in a way but I don't believe in that. I can't see teaching my son that. What do you tell your children?
question for Atheists with children?
by unbeliever 24 Replies latest jw friends
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lonelysheep
Well, first off, you're having a boy? AWWWW & congrats!!
My daughter is 6 and remembers the kh, so she does believe in god. My son is 4 and doesn't have a clue. Because I am 100% athiest, once in a while, I tell them *gasp* there is no god. I don't see this registering right now, and not until they can distinguish that Santa and the Easter Bunny aren't real. They can have the fantasy now as children, but when they get older, I WILL have a heart to heart with them and find out what they really think about the whole diety belief.
I don't feel like this is something I could possibly have control over, like my family had with forcing me to 'believe' in something. However, I DO feel like they have the right to not believe if they so choose one day. No one else in my family is athiest-just as was the case with the jdubs.
I can't help but wonder what it would've been like being raised by or around an athiest, as opposed to only christians.
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unbeliever
Hi lonelysheep,
I have been thinking if its a good idea to come out and say god is fake. Is it really my place? I would rather him come to that conclusion on his own. I can tell him what I personally believe and hope that in the end he rejects christianity. I also want to tell him to beware of preachers and priests. I don't want him to be worried about his soul going to hell or dying at Armageddon. I want him to think logically. I will be his guide and I want to do it the right way. Like you said we have the right to believe or not believe. I don't know why I am even worrying about this. Thanks.
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Grog
This is an issue I'm going to have to deal with down the line and I'm not sure how to do it either. Mine is a bit different. My wife is jewish and I frankly have no idea what I "am" She is on the fence about how to raise the kids when we have them but she really enjoyed her childhood but I think it was more of a cultural spiritual upbringing than the one I recieved as a witness. Her mom however is all about of course you need to raise the kids with religion and god. My family is full blown witness still and since I faded and never got baptized I'm still ok to hang out with. However i'm sure when I have kids they are going to get a huge dose of it from that angle. Personally I'm fine with raising children with some sort of spirituality I just don't want it to be exclusivist or separatist. Which... excludes almost all organized religion. So I think to sum it up I need to pay attention to this threads responses. Its a tough issue and one of the reasons we are waiting a couple years to have children. Good luck Grog
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dvw
hi, un.
i plan to tell them the truth. its a fairy tale. maybe they will get it from me by way of osmosis, so to speak. but if not, i will just give them my honest opinion and try not to denigrate the other side of the arguement. the only thing i dread saying is " when we die we dont come back." it must be so much easier to say "grandma is in heaven now, or she will be resurrected." what to do? do you comfort them and lie, or tell them the truth? how do you plan to handle it?
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jstalin
I have been thinking if its a good idea to come out and say god is fake. Is it really my place? I would rather him come to that conclusion on his own.
Unbeliever - why wouldn't you tell him that god is fake? It's no different then telling him that monsters or ghosts are fake. Why let him live in a delusion or not tell him the truth from the beginning? The sky is blue, there are no monsters under the bed, a triangle has three sides, there is no god. All simple statements of fact.
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Carmel
Personally I think the only honest action is to tell your children that there is no way of proving one way or another. Either side bases their beliefs on a degree of "faith". If there is a God, you can't excape being influenced by "its" existense, and on the flip side, if there isn't then obviouly "it" can't influence. A good secular education especially a few logic courses and a non-biased review of history and how religions were founded, evolved and were corrupted my give them some degree of insite to counter the one-sidedness of purely secular views.
todbbbbbbbbbbb
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garybuss
I'm not atheist, but I might be a pragmatist. I hope that's not too far off center. My sons are grown and they likely got their educations before I did. I benefit from having students and I tell them to be rational above all else and to be skeptical of all claims superhuman in nature.
I tell them not to believe in any miracles they don't see with their own eyes and I show them how a magician's tricks, like the levitating woman trick, work. That it's possible to be fooled by your own eyes.
A rational person doesn't fear objective reality. If I teach tactics, those tactics can't be used to fool my students. A good course in baloney detection, like Carl Sagan's, is a good place to start. -
bavman
Here's a thought. Why not take it from the Humanist angle (humanist's that are agnostic or atheist and generaly believe in evolution). Here's a link from the Humanist Society's page on resources for families. You will notice books for children that would teach some of the things you are talking about but also principles most people would want to instill in their children.
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parakeet
My husband and I, both atheist/agnostic, raised our son to treat others with kindness and respect, to tell the truth, to respect his parents and grandparents. He's now a fine young man in his 30s with a beautiful wife and a good job.
You don't need "God" to teach a child good values.