Would you bail your JW family out of a financial bind?

by unbeliever 35 Replies latest jw friends

  • unbeliever
    unbeliever

    I am so upset with my mother. She took a huge mortgage out on her house which was completely paid for. Her elder husband wanted to expand his business. The business is making no money at all. I was so pissed I did not get all the details but her and her worthless elder husband cannot afford the mortgage. My brother and I are so furious that she invested her security in some company that was not even making money in the first place. That bastard husband of hers I could just throttle him. So now it is up to me and my brother to save her or should I say them. My brother and I can afford to bail them out but damn this is killing me. By helping mom we are helping him and his good for nothing children who only work parttime and pioneer. I think they are totally using her. Before we bail her out we are going to have to put some safeguards in place so this does not happen again. I am so mad I could just spit. The more I think about it the more I think we are crazy for bailing her out of this bind but she will lose her beautiful house. Are my brother and I crazy for bailing her out?

    You know the funny thing is she has to come to her worldly apostate children for help. Her loving spiritual family are all so sympathetic but its only words. I don't seem them opening up their pocket book to help. I don't see the bastards children going and looking for fulltime jobs to help out. I don't see the bastard looking for regular employment. When I go back home January I am going to have it out with that son of a bitch. How dare he do this. I told mom she should have consulted with us before doing this. I know it looks like I am putting this all on my stepfather. I know my mom has some responsibility in this but I feel she was totally taken advantage of. She is in love with that peice of shit and knows nothing about business. The problem is neither does her good for nothing husband. I am done rambling. Thanks for letting me vent.

  • Outaservice
    Outaservice

    Have you introduced them to Amway? They're already good at door to door type work!

    Outaservice

  • MsMcDucket
    MsMcDucket

    Yes, I would help my daughters.

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    Maybe you can set it up so that you have an interest in the house as a result of bailing them out. Talk to a lawyer about it. It may be a good way to keep your stepfathers family from benefitting from what you are doing. Or let your mom have to sell her house and move into a trailer park with all the rest of the family.

    My mom has helped me out in the past and I would help her now that I could, but if there was an evil stepfamily involved, that might temper my personal benevolence. I'm not very nice sometimes.

  • mama1119
    mama1119

    I would help my Mom out, even if she was married to a jerk. I would make my feelings clear about the jerk however.

  • hubert
    hubert
    Maybe you can set it up so that you have an interest in the house as a result of bailing them out. Talk to a lawyer about it. It may be a good way to keep your stepfathers family from benefitting from what you are doing.

    I was thinking close to these thoughts.

    Could you buy the house (pay off the mortgage) and charge her (and them) a meanial rent? This way your Mom gets to stay in her house, and it is protected from this happening again.

    Hubert

  • unbeliever
    unbeliever

    My brother is speaking with his lawyer about our best option. One way or another that house will be in our names. There is no way we are going to shell out thousands of dollars and let them to do this again. We do not expect mom to repay us. They have a lot of other debt or should I say the bastard has debt that needs to be paid off. One of the reasons they cannot pay of the mortgage. I am still shaking my head how they got approval for a loan in the first place with his debt. Our goal is to keep mom out of bankruptcy and her house out of foreclosure.

  • ridgerunner
    ridgerunner

    I am about to face a similar situation and you are getting some good advice. My no. 1 advice to help your mother is not let feelings get in the way of this. There are leeches in the pond and that means this is strictly business. Bravo on getting a lawyer (I hope a good one). Just remember this, if they want your help then you are in charge. Take as much control as needed including the house. The deadbeats listed need to get a day job or no deal. Having been in the borg for many, many years I know the guilt trips (I'm a pioneering janitor, I'm sick, etc). Help your Mom, take control, lay down the law. It sounds like you're ont the right track. Good luck to you.

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow

    I believe you should put the house in your names.

    I'd only agree to let them live there as long as husband and kiddo's go to work fulltime andpay a fair amount of rent.

    I'd get it in writing.

    I'd also make sure the agreement stipulated that if they don't work or figure out ways to pay that fair rent, they would be evicted, except for your mother, who would be allowed to stay if she could find a housemate to help her pay the rent.

    I'd also let Mom know she alone is welcome in your home, should she find herself homeless. You should confront the husband about his irresponsible business decisions.

  • unbeliever
    unbeliever

    My brother and I planned not to charge mom rent after the bail out. We chose to think of it as investing in her future. lol

    That is a good idea to make the freeloaders pay rent. Maybe I will tell her to kick the stepkids out of house, make her good for nothing husband get a stable job to pay off his debts or pay rent. I will talk it over with my brother.

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