Has anyone ever successfully opened someone else's eyes?

by gordon d 12 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  jgnat

  I think I'm more successful as a facilitator. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Facilitator I help people make up their own minds. That is, when someone is ready, I ask leading questions and provide encouragement to help them on their way. This is good, because as an adult, no-one should make up your mind for you.

  • My daughter did, with a fellow teenager, about ten years ago. I told my daughter she would not win this girl over with words. Just befriend her. It worked. And this was before I understood the power of WT indoctrination.
  • Again, third party, I think my advice to partners of JW's has helped them avoid newbie mistakes. I can think of a few husbands who forestalled a study/baptism attempt with their wives, after getting board advice.
  • I befriended a congregation member over the internet. She'd exited in her mind before I even met her. She left after stirring the pot a bit. I hope she is doing well.

  Here's some more examples of where I've helped people think outside their box (non-JW examples):

  • I asked our local forms expert about the possibilities of taking her talents government-wide? Her unit has more than doubled in size since.
  • I convinced an employee to reconsider her decision not to work for Alberta Agriculture based on her (animal rights) principles. I asked her if she could work at Children's Services, for instance, if she loved children?

  A good question to ask people who are struggling with a hard decision, is to have them imagine the consequences a year's hence. Would they regret their choice?
• 

  Mulan

  Yes, my cousin and my sister in law. My cousin was a holdout in the family, and constantly tried to get me to go back to meetings even though her husband had quit too. One time when we were talking, I said some things that finally cracked through her hard shell. Simple questions but it made her think finally.

  1. when Jesus ascended to heaven, who did he appoint as his successor? (answer is "no one"............she got it right)
  2. he said he would send a helper. who was that? ("holy spirit"............got that right too)
  3. who has put themselves in the position of his successor? ("faithful and discreet slave"..........that made her crumble)

  My sister in law was visiting from California, and we were having lunch at the Mall. She said she was worried about me and that I didn't talk about the Kingdom anymore. (her husband was my husband's older brother...........he passed away young in 1997, but was with her then......about summer 1996) I told her we were fading and that Dave had resigned as an elder and that we didn't believe it was the truth anymore. I went through the same list of simple questions that I had used on my cousin. I also talked to her about the chronology leading to 1914 and how it didn't work, when Jerusalem was destroyed in 586/87, not 607 and that we had documentation to prove it. I wasn't sure how she was taking it all, because she was just silently, politely listening to me.

  When she finally spoke, she replied that she felt like the weight of the world was off her shoulders and wanted to know everything. She also wanted Dave to talk to Sam, her husband, so we talked late into the night and for several days. They left for home with several books and read them out loud to each other on their drive home. "True Believer", "Crisis of Conscience" and "In Search of Christian Freedom".

  Sometimes it's easy, if they are ready to hear it and you trust them not to run to the elders. If they aren't ready to hear it, nothing you say will crack through.
• 

  KW13

  Sometimes i get a bit too passionate and i scare 'em but even so, they dont argue because they see the flaws in their arguement (huge gaping blackholes).