Mary,
God doesn't hate you, he loves you just like so many of us here do. You are a fascinating person with a lot of thought and a great mind. I think your about one of the most sweetest people here on the board. If you get down and out just call me I will send you my phone # in your PM. I understand where you are coming from when things get so heavy on a persons shoulders, but it's not God hating you it is just the way life is these days. So much is going on in the world today that it can become stressful. Just sit back take a deep breathe and relax. Life is soooooooo good.