Last Wednesday evening I attended a Catholic mass for the first time in my life. Being raised as one of Jehovah's Witnesses, I rarely ever saw the inside of another church (maybe the occasional wedding or music recital), but Catholic churches were particularly off limits.
I am now exploring my spiritual horizons. I have several good friends who are Catholic, one who is newly converted Catholic. I decided I wanted to find out more about this religion.
First thing I noticed was that Catholics do not go to church to talk to each other, they go to church to talk to God. They begin praying the minute they enter the door of the sanctuary.
I found the service, with its sung and unified prayers and rituals, to be a very moving experience. When the time came for communion, my friend said, "You can stay in your seat. Or you can go to the front and ask the priest for a blessing (by crossing your arms over your chest and bowing slightly)". I thought, I'm here so I might as well experience what I can. So I went to the front.
I can't describe the feeling I had when the priest touched my forehead and said, "The blessings of the Lord Jesus be with you now and always." It was an amazing feeling.
I've been digesting this experience for the past week. It has made me think about how, my whole life, I was taught to categorize people: in the truth, out of the truth, good association, bad association, opposed, apostate, weak, disfellowshiped, disassociated, etc. etc. ad nauseum. We read scriptures like "Judge not that you be not judged" and then they were dismissed with, "This means that we do not judge any person's final outcome with God". But there certainly WAS a lot of judging going on...
And this man whom I had never met, who had probably never even seen me before, who certainly knew NOTHING about me, called down a blessing for me JUST BECAUSE. JUST BECAUSE all it really takes is TO ASK.
"Ask and it shall be given. Knock and it shall be opened." Doesn't say anything about some committee of old men having to decide that you're good enough for God to bless you.
God decides.
No, I'm not jumping into joining any church right now. I'm still searching and trying to decide what to do about my spiritual life.
But I don't believe that I have ever felt unconditional love before last Wednesday. And that has to mean SOMETHING.
*SMILES*
NanaR