A JW marrying outside of their faith in absolutely frowned upon. For her to do so would be bad for her from a religious standpoint, and if she is trying to repent and be a good JW, there is no way this will work for her. If she gets disfellowshipped, you will have a whole other can of worms to deal with if she tries to "get back in". I feel for you man. We aren't knocking the girl have met, but she is in a very difficult situation.
Hi all im new here and have lots of questions
by mr_phishy 25 Replies latest jw friends
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mr_phishy
I started in interesting thread he he he
she has been bac for 4 weeks and we are continuing our relationship and she is standing strong that she wants to be with me, which has been very difficult for her, but shes just not sure how she will be judged, the family is ok wit it, albeit concerned for her future, but thts normal. Its the congregation officials or elders whoever it is that has to meet wit her in 2 weeks...
im a bit lost and alone at moment, however not susectible to being "clensed". I am fully aware of many of there illegitamit principles and biblical "translations" that dont really stack up. but just need to know what might b the outcome if we continue in the future.
thanks
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MsMcDucket
I guess you better ask her what her plans are. You better ask about how she feels about raising children? Which religion? For starts.
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ellderwho
wvpeach:
I'm never interested in Gossip and slandering other christians , and the Jehovah's Wittness's are just that .
They are my christiand brothers and sisters, just like the methodists or the baptists .
Pick your denomination and you'll find christian brothers and sisters there including the Jehovahs Wittness's
Firstly, Its wonderful you have a good relationship with your Jw spouse. You must realize however that the Org. does not feel the same as you do about them.
Secondly, the Witnesses do not associate themselves with "Christians" outside of there camp. Although in the media at times they will portray themsleves as "Christians" ie. NGO status of the United Nations and the legal systems and so forth.
Finally, the official doctrine is clear, all religions of the world are a part of "Babylon the great"
There's plenty of upstanding good people in the organization. They just happend to be mis-lead by men who are by definition false prophets.
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ellderwho
im a bit lost and alone at moment, however not susectible to being "clensed". I am fully aware of many of there illegitamit principles and biblical "translations" that dont really stack up. but just need to know what might b the outcome if we continue in the future.
mr phishy
You might want to check "free minds" web site for official doctrine. Under Watch tower doctrine.
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jgnat
However there isnt really any introduction information, like a clear home page and if you are actually alighned with a particular group/organisation!
Because we're not! If there's anything that unifies the ex-JW community, it's the allergy to organization. This site is a loose association of people who have an interest in Jehovah's Witnesses. I'm not a JW, never was one. But I married a JW. So I belong.
however she wants to repent the bad things done while here and be a good JW again.... when the jury hand down there verdic in 2 weeks time.
This means, no more fornication. She will be put under discipline of some kind. And if she is to remain with you, she will have to legitimize the relationship. No more unsupervised visits until then.
I should reiterate that we are happily 'together' but there are obviously lots of things to work out before we meet again.
She will be put under tremendous pressure to either walk away from you or convert to her religion. Before you marry. Are you ready to have your sweetheart change in to a cold person front of your eyes? Are you prepared for her to glare at you as if you had suddenly grown fangs and horns? The moaning and crying that she will lose everything if you don't convert?
My JW husband was a little smarter. He did not confess to our relationship until AFTER we were married. The elders gnashed their teeth, but there was little they could do. Astute JW's do their business and confess afterwards.
she has been bac for 4 weeks and we are continuing our relationship and she is standing strong that she wants to be with me,
I suggest you run down to the local marriage commissioner's and get a certificate before the elders come down with their decision. Then the elders can't break you apart.
Also, as others have said, you two have to have a serious conversation where your beliefs will clash. Especially if you plan on having children together. Will you be able to celebrate holidays together? If a child of yours needed a blood transfusion, would she accept? Could you honor HER wishes and allow her to die for lack of blood?
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Quandry
wvpeach
Welcome to the forum.
I am on this forum because here I can speak the truth and say what is on my mind, and cannot at the Kingdom Hall.
You state that you believe in Jesus, and that all Christians are your brothers and sisters. I am not disfellowshipped. I would never walk up to you in a Kingdom Hall and say anything contrary to your beliefs to you. However, they do not feel the same toward you. What you will find here is the truth about Jehovah's Witnesses.
The official stance of Jehovah's Witnesses is that your worship is directed to Satan if you are not one of Jehovah's Witnesses. You are an Egyptian; a Cannanite, worthy of destruction at Armaggedon. Your husband is spiritualy weak, and was disobedient to marry you if he was at the time one of Jehovah's Witnesses.
You have no standing with God or Jesus. I can't make it any plainer than that. Ask your husband what the official Watchtower stance is--not his stance---the official one. He may reply something like this..."Well, er, um, that is, I am not the judge...." Continue to press him for the OFFICIAL STANCE OF JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES TOWARD "WORLDLY PEOPLE", and by the way, that is you.
I hate to burst your bubble, but those smiling faces at the Kingdom Hall only want to convert you before it is too late for you, and right now they feel that you are buzzard bait waiting for the pickings.
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Sunspot
Apologizing to Mr Phishy for addressing WVPeach on this thread....
They are my christiand brothers and sisters, just like the methodists or the baptists .
...but I just wrote a post explaining JW teachings and how they affect and view all "others"....only to see that she is actually married to a JW and knows full well what they believe.....or want "others" to think they believe!
They AREN'T LIKE Methodists or Baptists.....and you should have known that! They elevate themselves FAR above every other religion on the earth and arrogantly feel that they alone are the ONLY religion that God has handpicked and approves of. Unless YOU are a JW----you will DIE right where you stand when God destroys everyone else in the world!
Do JWs REALLY CONSIDER Methodists and Baptists to actually BE "fellow Christians"? WVPeach.....you may want to ask your JW hubby about that!
Do you two celebrate his birthday together?
Do you share the wonder of Christmas with him?
Do you share the JOY of the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior with him?
Does HE look down on those that DO celebrate these Christian events? Do YOU?
There are countless questions to be asked and that you could answer, WVPeach.....but this "these are ALL my Christian brothers and sisters" speech just doesn't fly, ESPECIALLY when you know what the WTS teaches about this.
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drew sagan
You posted that it is her life and that you do not want to change her. I don't think you realize that these kind of situations only work out if one of you IS changed. Either you convert to her religion, or she decides to leave the WTS. The middle ground on this can be overwhelming and painful for the both of you.
The bottom line is that this religion divides people. It is not as simple and innocent as might be first perceived. Even if your girlfriend fades away from the orgniazation there is still alot of emotional guilt that this religion puts on a person.
You need to take some time to learn more about this religion and what it is all about. Be very cautious!!!. You are a Catholic which is their prime target! You more than likely have allready been in the situation where you can't answer back to questions she has or challenges she has raised regarding the Bible and religion. JWs are taught how to win arguements and to confuse you. If you are not careful you might find yourself falling for their tricks. It's good you found this board, but your going to have to expand out even deeper. Books by ex-members can give you some wonderful insight. I would suggest the book Crisis of Conscience for a start. All of your questions about this group can be answered by many on this board. I suggest you visit here often.
You really have a choice to make. There is no middle ground in situations like this. You have to realize that the Watchtower is a controlling religion with many cult like characteristics (information control, guilting it's members, fear, ect...). Realize that this can be very involved and cause alot of stress for the both of you. This religion is not going to react to you in the way that you will treat it back. It will be harsh to her. -
mr_phishy
Thanks all for the interesting resopnses.
Obviously you know that it is a complicated situation for both of us. I truly hope that one day she can open her eyes and see how it operates from the "outside" but im not holding my breath.
Drew Sagen: i definatly agree with what you said aboutthe lack of middle ground.. could be good to talk to you more about this situation, you seem almost neutral on the issue? I dont really care, but it dosent help me when everyone just takes the piss out of them. (even its pretty translucent belief system)
Where can i acces this book that a few of you recomend reading? And if she were a bit undecided about her faith, would it be recommended for her to try reading something too. All she has ever read is WT publications.
Thanks again
Mic