I'm coming out on my blog.

by Abandoned 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    Thanks everyone. I appreciate the support. I'm finally coming out, really coming out from under this cloud of guilt and striving that was instilled into me by the jw. I'm right now reminded of a sorry that used to make me mad at my mom, but now makes me see what a total jackass I was for so long.

    Last year, even though I'd been out of the jw for about three years, my mom grabbed me to give me a big hug. It was around Christmas time and she had just put up her tree and decorated the house. After she hugged me she told me, "I remember when you were a little boy. You used to love Christmas more than anyone of us. You'd always have the tree decorated before anyone else and you'd always be the most excited this time of year."

    When she told me that I was mad at her. I didn't say anthing, but I was mad and I can now identify that anger. It was the conflict between the trash that the jw poured into my mind and the fact that I not only knew she was right but REALLY MISSED those simpler times. When I put on the "new personality," I became an arrogant jerk who knew everything and "accurately" looked down on those who weren't as enlightened as I was. The saddest part is that I DIDN'T REALIZE IT AT ALL.

    When I look back on the things I said and did in support of "kingdom interests," I'm ashamed and embarrassed. My family could have told me to get lost but they patiently waited for their love to sink in.

    Now that I can see the hateful damage the jw did to me, to my relationships, and to my self-esteem, I don't want revenge, per se, but I do feel the need to make my story known and available so that those who are about to be or are already mislead by the watchtower snake oil salesmen can have ONE MORE RESOURCE available to help them see what a bunch of hypocrites their leaders are.

    OK, I've rambled again.

    Thanks everyone. I don't think I've ever felt this light or this free.

  • BabaYaga
    BabaYaga

    Sounds GREAT so far. Cheers and strength to you. Someday I will have the courage also (damn it's been too long already) but right now my relationship with my sister means too much.

    Kudos to you.
    Baba.

  • juni
    juni

    Very good Abandoned. Fluent, concise, and good spelling.

    You had said this:

    When I put on the "new personality," I became an arrogant jerk who knew everything and "accurately" looked down on those who weren't as enlightened as I was. The saddest part is that I DIDN'T REALIZE IT AT ALL.

    When I look back on the things I said and did in support of "kingdom interests," I'm ashamed and embarrassed. My family could have told me to get lost but they patiently waited for their love to sink in.

    I can relate to what you said about that new personality. I didn't like who I became. It was always US vs. THEM mentality.

    Be thankful you have an understanding and patient family! I didn't fair so well in that area. Though my home life while growing up wasn't wonderful either.

    I'm going to visit your blog now.

    I'm glad that you are starting to feel better about yourself. It does take time and is different for everyone because of our personalities and situations.

    Juni

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere

    Sounds like a great start. I will venture to guess that you will find the process very liberating.

    Funny, I can relate to some of what have said.

    I was reluctant to tell people about my JW past because I felt shame. Only one or two people actually had a negative response to my 'revelation'. The rest were mildly amused and supportive.

    I was also reluctant to tell my extended family members that I no longer believed. I 'came out' to many of them at a family reunion 2 months ago.

    Honesty is the best way to go. Be honest with yourself and others will respect you for it.

    btw - If I haven't already said so: "Welcome to JWD!"

    -Aude Sapere (Meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Understanding.)

  • buriram
    buriram

    Good for you guvnor!

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    Whats a blog?...OUTLAW

  • juni
    juni

    Just read your blog. No wonder your letter was fluent - you write poems, etc.

    That is very interesting. What kind of work do you do? You may PM if you want.

    And you live in Rochester, MN. - home of the Mayo Clinic. I'm near Madison, WI so we both have the cold and snow to get through!

    Juni

    What's a blog OUTLAW? It's the opposite of a gobsmacker and you know what that is, right?

    Juni

  • buriram
    buriram

    Its a passing trend , sure it will die out soon, i hope same as my space , what a load of pooo.

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    Thanks again everyone. :-)

    Outlaw: A blog is an online journal. A lot of them are public and available to anyone who has an internet account. Mine is located on myspace.com, but there are many different ones available.

  • buriram
    buriram

    He knows full well what it is , he's just being silly.

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