JW Wedding - Saturday

Zico

I'm going to a JW wedding on Saturday. The Groom is 20, and the bride is 22.

A bit young this, don't you think? They argue A LOT as well. I think they're only marrying because they want sex, but then, I don't know for sure, but I don't see any other reason why they would get married, since they never seem to talk to each other much except to moan at each other. They don't APPEAR to get one.

Anyway, they're going to London for their honeymoon. During the week one of the Groom's friends is in London, and the Groom is trying to get away from his wife so he can go spend a day with his mate. ON HIS HONEYMOON. Have you ever heard of anything like this? True story.

Whilst I can't help but laugh at how ridiculous that is, I sincerely hope they don't have children any time soon.

fullofdoubtnow

Although I don't know them, I wish them well.

I've seen quite a few late teen/early 20's weddings in the jws, and sad to say, many of them broke up later.

the Groom is trying to get away from his wife so he can go spend a day with his mate. ON HIS HONEYMOON

That doesn't sound like the ideal start to a marriage either.

Zico

Yeah, not ideal at all. I'm only 20 myself, but even I could work out that this is a ridiculous thing to do.

Finally-Free

A bit young this, don't you think? They argue A LOT as well. I think they're only marrying because they want sex, but then, I don't know for sure, but I don't see any other reason why they would get married, since they never seem to talk to each other much except to moan at each other.

During the week one of the Groom's friends is in London, and the Groom is trying to get away from his wife so he can go spend a day with his mate. ON HIS HONEYMOON.

Are you sure you want to attend this wedding and waste your money on a gift when it's obvious they can barely stand each other now? The marriage will likely break up, and they'll spend 10 times it's value fighting over it when their lawyers are negotiating the division of the assets. Multiply this by, let's say, 100 gifts.

Trust me, you'll be doing them a favour by not giving them a gift.

W

mama1119

I know sooo many dubs that got married in teens, or *gasp* waited until they turned 20, and they look positively miserable with each other. I think a good majority of them setteld for the first that came along. So many girls in my area focused strictly on finding a man, so they married any old guy. One girl told me she would rather die than not be married by 21. So she married this guy from Montana. When I first saw them together, I didn;t know she was married, and I thought he was someone she was caretaking or something...he looked, well, retarded, for lack of a better word. She was a decent looking girl, fun and funny, she could have found someone with looks, and personality, but was too caught up in making sure she didn;t get left behind on the nmarraige train.

Zed

Thats quite sad I think, but its also reflective of the organisation as a whole.

When I moved to Lancashire - because my dad was not in the troof, I had a weekly study with the youngest son of the PO. (now my brother in law who totally hates all things JW) when we first met up I remember him saying "what do you want to be doing when you are 21?>" I was 17 almost 18 at the time. My response - Married, possibly with children. To this day I can remember the shocked look on his face ...

That feeling of being left out if your not with someone (ie "courting" - god do i hate that word) seeing all the girls going for the most attractive brothers and leaving the less attractive, or slightly worldly ones to one side. you then get this feeling of being a nobody. You go to pubs to do nothing but meet girls, to hope to find someone to go out with. That whole pressure thing just seemed to kill me and made me wonder why should it be like this as well as make you think : "I must be really ugly!!" I dont think in all the time ive been out that ive seen bigger cattle markets than some of the post assembly gatherings of 18+ bro's n sisters.

Sad really but its the way of the borg I guess. You reap what you sow and all that.

Zico

I think another reason why there are so many young marriages, is because you're not meant to start dating someone till you're ready for marriage. I'm sure this varies from Congregation to Congregation, but my own Cong is very strict on this. The instant you start courting someone, you're pulled into the back by the elders and questioned as to what your intentions are, and told 'you shouldn't be courting this person unless you plan to marry them in future.' even though it's impossible to know if a person is right for you when you first met, no matter what your age. And then you're under pressure to marry someone you hardly know.

sundawn77

Where I live 20 is ancient! Almost all of my friends got married at 18 or 19; some even got married at 17. Many were engaged in high school. I'm 24, and most definitely viewed as an old maid. I know for a fact that some blame my fading away and dating non-witness guys on not getting a Witness husband. Laughable, but at the same time mildly annoying.

unbeliever

I'm friends with this one active witness that got married really young and popped out 3 kids by the time she was 21. She is miserable. She told me if she had to do it over again she would have waited to get married. Now she is stuck with a husband she is not in love with. Poor thing.

juni

I don't know how it is now, but up to 1992 when I left after 21 years as an active JW there were quite a few "young" marriages. Most failed. Very sad when there are children involved.

This marriage was doomed from the get go.

Zico said:

I think another reason why there are so many young marriages, is because you're not meant to start dating someone till you're ready for marriage. I'm sure this varies from Congregation to Congregation, but my own Cong is very strict on this. The instant you start courting someone, you're pulled into the back by the elders and questioned as to what your intentions are, and told 'you shouldn't be courting this person unless you plan to marry them in future.' even though it's impossible to know if a person is right for you when you first met, no matter what your age. And then you're under pressure to marry someone you hardly know

You are absolutely, 100% correct.

Juni

JW Wedding - Saturday

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