Who am I?

purplesofa

Who am I to break away?

Don't the people who raised me, supported me, formed me---through their organizations and beliefs know more than I do?

Don't I owe them gratitude and respect?

How do I change a complete belief system?

It's as impossible as completely changing my appearance.

Everyone has been born into something.

How radical and rebellious I must seem.

How detached from my my peers must I feel?

How much suffering must be endured to be who I am?

Soon I feel like all my attachments will be detached

and there lies peace~true love~understanding~contentment.

Maybe finding this will enable bonds as I have never known before.

purps

AK - Jeff

A metamorphosis is a beautiful thing.

alt

This butterfly is called a 'Purplish' - thought that fit you purps.

Jeff

AK - Jeff

alt

This is the 'Great Purple Hairstreak'

Both were once cocoons - now look at 'em.

Jeff

My thoughts were just racing as I was working today. When I could stop for a moment, I wrote down what I was thinking. I thought someone else might have felt this way or gone through this. I wasn't sure anyone would understand. Thank-you for understanding.

Thanks again. That was so nice. They truely are beautiful.

purps

JamesThomas

This is the most important question that can ever be asked.

It requires a thorough investigation into everything the mind says and believes the "me" to be.

Notice that every description and thought the mind presents as "self" is witnessed by something untouched by these things. How deep does this silent and pristine pool go? Who/what am I, really?

Let go of everything that can be let go. Remove all that can be removed. What remains? What is foundationally true and unmoving? Who/what am I, really?

j

gordon d

Hi Purps.... That was beautiful!

Here's the song that answers that question for me.....

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

I am yours.

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
'Cause I am yours.
I am yours.

codeblue

Yes, Purps...I am feeling the same way.

I am deep down the same person I was when an active Jw: kind to people, good morals, and love my family. Those are facts about my character.

I think de-programming takes years....

Personally wishing I could invent the "selective lobotomy"....I would make millions and forever get rid of the pain that haunts me.

Take care purps

Codeblue

AK - Jeff

alt

this one is a Blue, for codeblue.

Two of my favorite posters both in quandry today. Don't change CB - just modify self, and be self. No need to cast off the person you have become - now you can be better, built on the same base.

Jeff

choosing life

Codeblue

Your "selctive lobotomy" reminded me of the movie with Jim Carry in it- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. It is not a comedy as he usually does. Rather it shows that our memories, both good and bad, help to form the person we are and both are necessary in this life.

Purps

You are morphing into something beautiful, just give it time and don't be too hard on yourself. Being true to yourself will eventually lead to the most happiness we can attain in this life. And just because your parents have made mistakes in some instances, doesn't mean you must follow. Hope things look up for you.

codeblue

(((Jeff))) thanks for the kind words and thoughts. I enjoy your posts too.

I am just agreeing with Purplesofa's thread and saying there are people that feel like she does... I think she needs a lot of support now...

I don't plan on changing my character at all....just need to find purpose in life and the selective lobotomy (to remove the pain caused from cult issues)

Codeblue

Who am I?

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