Teen bullied to death

by Elsewhere 14 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Elsewhere

  If I had a kid who was being bullied... they better tie me up... there's no telling what I might do to the bullies.

  http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/news/article-23375378-details/Boy%2C+13%2C+hangs+himself+after+bullies+pelt+him+with+food/article.do

  although they found some evidence of bullying, there was nothing that would justify criminal action.

  This is the problem. Bullying is not seen as a crime! If one were to "bully" an adult stranger on the street there would be charges of aggravated assault and terrorist threats.

  teachers had investigated allegations that Paul had been covered in food but found he was not the only one because there had been a "food fight" on the bus.

  Fucking MORON! What the hell did he think the "food fight" was about?

  Boy, 13, hangs himself after bullies pelt him with food21.11.06

  A Schoolboy hanged himself using his favourite football team scarf after complaining that he was being persecuted on the bus ride home from lessons.

  Paul Moran, 13, would sometimes arrive in tears, his hair and clothes covered with food and drink thrown by other pupils, his mother said yesterday.

  On one occasion his beloved Liverpool FC bag was ripped and on another he was even thrown down stairs, Carole Moran added.

  Finally, after speaking about suicide to friends, the "sensitive and caring" teenager's mother found him suspended from his metal bunk bed with his Liverpool scarf, facing a poster of his favourite team.

  In a further tragedy, a girl from the same school, Jenny Sykes, also 13, hanged herself eight months later after apparently becoming depressed over his death.

  Detectives investigating the schoolgirl's death took away her computer after fears that she visited suicide chatrooms before killing herself.

  Yesterday an inquest into Paul's death in Blackpool, Lancashire, heard that his mother had complained three times to staff at Lytham St Annes High School that he was being bullied.

  Mrs Moran, 45, told the hearing: "One day he came home covered in eggs and flour and crying his eyes out. He could not understand why he was being picked on and kept saying 'Why me, why me?'.

  "They even tore his Liverpool football bag which upset him. The school bus stop was right outside our house but often he would get off a few stops earlier to avoid more trouble."

  One day he was pushed out of his seat on the top deck and thrown down the stairs, and on another his boots were thrown off the bus, she said.

  He started avoiding the upper deck after his earring was ripped out but could still hear bullies shouting abuse at him from upstairs, and on one occasion a girl spat at him and shoved a banana in his face.

  She added that his older brother Steven, 23, had offered to speak to the bullies, but Paul feared that would only make things worse.

  On November 27 last year, a Sunday, just hours after he had been looking at a Christmas catalogue with his mother, his six-year-old sister, Courtney, found him hanging in his room.

  She fetched their mother who dialled 999 but paramedics were unable to save him.

  Following his death, police took 23 statements from other children at the school and discovered he had spoken to friends about suicide.

  But although they found some evidence of bullying, there was nothing that would justify criminal action.

  At yesterday's hearing, school headteacher Phillip Wood said teachers had investigated allegations that Paul had been covered in food but found he was not the only one because there had been a "food fight" on the bus.

  He added: "I do not think it was aimed at Paul uniquely. The problem is that what is high spirits to some children can appear to be bullying to others."

  The school had a strict anti-bullying policy which had been updated since Paul's death, he added.

  Coroner Anne Hind said Paul may have been worried because the prospect of going back to school the following morning was looming.

  However she recorded an open verdict, saying: "It could have been an accident, it could have been a cry for help, or it could have been a successful suicide, but Paul left no note and we will never know."

  Jenny Sykes, who is not thought to have been close friends with Paul but who was apparently deeply moved by his death, was found hanged at her home on July 12.

  Police said they did not find any evidence she had visited suicide chatrooms. An inquest into her death is expected to be heard next year.
• 

  Elsewhere

  It could have been an accident

  I guess I could accidentally crack a bat across the bullies head.
• 

  purplesofa

  This reminds of when I was in school.

  I moved to a new state and started a new school at the end of 8th grade. So I was new. There was a girl in gym class that was like 4ft, wore super thick glasses, had a hairdo like an old lady and was just different.

  We were getting dressed to go back to class and I asked Allison if I could borrow her deoderant. She said .........yeah if you could get it away from them........A group of girls were using it and would not return it.......So I stepped up and got it back. I took up for Allison for the rest of the year.

  So the next year in 9th grade I was in the same class as these girls. They remembered me and started to give me trouble. Money would come up missing out of my locker, things hidden, stuff like that......it just continued to get worse.......So I talked to the PE teacher about it. I wanted to be switchd to another class. Well, these group of girls were black and she did not want me to back down and let "them" win. She was going to handle it.

  We played soccer and we had a good game going, but as usual these girls would give me hell. I was pretty tough......but this particular day they were purposely kicking my shins .....hard .....and it hurt. I had taken all I could and cried I believe. Running off the field ....embarrassed that I cried went to the principals office and told what was going on.

  I never had to go to that class again.

  It would not have taken much for me to want to do as this boy did..........had the bullying gotten stronger........Who knows what would have happened if I had not changed classes..........It all was totally needless. All because a PE teacher would not do anything about it, so "they" would not win.

  purps

  Allison, the little short dorky girl.........(a whole other story) I found out later died from a brain tumor before she could finish highschool.

  edited to add: They bullied Allison, she was weaker, and when I stepped in, they switched over to me. I dont want to give the impression I suffered what this boy suffered. But, there are those that bully, and there are those that get bullied, and there are those that observe and ignore, to me those are the ones most at fault.
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  Bullying should never be brushed off as boys being boys or that's how children are!

  My mother used to say to us when we would complain, "Children can be some of the cruelist people in the world."

  Some people think you shouldn't interfere with bullying, kind of like when people filming animals in the wild don't think they should intervene when an animal is in peril. They feel it's nature at work, culling out the weak and the inferior. I think they are full of _____!
• 

  delilah

  This makes me so angry. No child should ever be bullied by anyone, and children should not be committing suicide because of it. This is preposterous!! The schools here, and probably everywhere, have all adopted a "No Bullying" policy. Yet, when you talk to the teacher, about your child being bullied, there is little they do about it, if anything. If your child fights back, they end up in trouble, or expelled from school, which then goes on their record.

  My eldest son was bullied every single day for almost a whole year, both at school, and at Optimist Club Teen dances, until we finally told him to fight back. I called the principle of the school, and warned her that my son had our permission, to teach this kid a lesson, once and for all. She warned us, that this "bully", came from a broken home, his mother was a crack addict and his father also a druggie, and he really needed to be "understood".

  I told her in no uncertain terms, was my son going to take his crap anymore. She warned me that if it happened on school grounds, my son would be suspended. I told her, not to worry, it wouldn't, and my son was NOT going to be punished. I said, "if you, the teacher, cannot and /or will not, protect my child, than he was going to do the job himself, and be done with it."

  A week later, the fight happpened, off school property. I came home, and as I got out of the car, my son came up, and began to cry...he said, "mom, we fought. I gave him a bloody nose". I asked him how he felt....he said he felt terrible, he didn't like hurting the kid, but now he was certain the bully was going to leave him alone. I called the principle, told her it happened, and the boy had better leave my son alone from now on. She said she had to report it to the school board, and she'd let me know their decision. I said, "There'll be no decision. I'll get a lawyer if I have to." That was the end of it.

  Know what? That bully, asked my son, if he could be friends with my son and his friends. Of course, I said "No way....you be nice to him, but you are not hanging out with him". End of story. I met the boy at graduation, and he had really changed his ways...his dad stepped up to the plate, and straightened his life around, in order to take care of his son.

  I feel for kids, like this boy, but I'm not going to ignore my son being bullied, just because the bullying kid has troubles. They need to know that their actions are not acceptable, and learn to deal with their problems in other ways.

  Our children should not be taking their lives, because of some kid who is picking on them.
• 

  restrangled

  I was bullied up and through the 7th grade.....From first grade on. It only got worse as I got older. The first reason was I was smart, the second, I was a JW, the third, I had very full lips and some jerk started calling me "N.....lips" when I was about 10 and the reputation never left me. A teacher even laughed about it in Jr. High.

  Funny thing is, most women now are paying big bucks to duplicate what I have, but that kind of torture never leaves your soul, even as an adult much like the witness baloney. To this day I cannot wear lipstick because I feel too self-conscious

  I remember the doctor who delivered my second son, who was about my age at the time telling me I had the most gorgeous pout he had ever seen....I was never so embarrassed.

  Bullying should be confronted and stopped immediately. It destroys lives and self esteem for years. I for one understand the kids who lose it and want to kill. If I met the damn fool who originally labled me, (I'm 47) .....I would make him pay for the rest of his living years....NO KIDDING!

  r.
• 

  Iforget

  I have to say this is my worst fear. I have a daughter 13 months old with Down Syndrome. Some of you here have seen her picture and know that beautiful face and smile. I know one day I have to let her venture out into this cold cruel world and hear the "r" word and people will stare and say even more unkind things. It's painful as a parent to know that all you can do for your typical children is to instill compassion and hope they don't copy or display this behavior. It's just that much more painful to have a child with special needs who cannot defend themselves.

  This story is devastating. It breaks my heart that the child was in so much pain and felt no other way out.
• 

  LongHairGal

  Grade school age:
  
  The worst wasn't on school grounds. There was a neighborhood boy who thought he would taunt me when I passed down his block to go on an errand to the grocery store. I told my next-door neighbor lady about it (I felt I couldn't tell my parents because the family was so dysfunctional). I decided to go down a different block to go to the store. Problem solved here.
  
  But, I had some minor name-calling bullying issues in grammar school. Mostly because of the fact that my parents dressed me like a dork and my mother forced me to wear my hair in a stupid style. I wanted to be like the cool girls. This didn't get too out of hand because I went to a catholic school and back then the nuns used to hit people or pull hair. This is one reason I was glad there was corporal punishment back then.
  
  High school age:
  
  I had problems in the lunch room with catty girls. I used to have to listen to ethnic slurs and jokes. Even though I was on the reserved side, I did have a weapon at my disposal: my wit. Even though I am not the type to ever make fun of anybody's looks (because I feel people can't help it), there was one cruel girl who thought she would verbally gang up on me. I put her in her place with a cutting remark about her appearance. I was only defending myself and I am sure she hates me, but she never bothered me again.
  
  
  LHG
• 

  under_believer

  I was bullied and teased mercilessly from about the third grade through the 10th grade. I had clothes ripped, was punched, hit, teased, called names, spit on, had food thrown at me, you name it. I have literally seen it all.
  
  Why? I was very small for my age. I was bookish and nerdy, and terrible at sports. My parents, though they could afford good clothes, chose to shop at the Good Will (an American used clothing and thrift store) instead. I was a Witness and didn't celebrate holidays or do innumerable other things the other kids did on a daily basis, like salute the flag.
  
  My parents did absolutely nothing to stand up for or protect me. For one they're both non-confrontational wimps; and for another they (especially my mom) just saw it as inevitable persecution that she couldn't prevent if she wanted to; another sign of the times.
  
  The teachers did absolutely nothing to stand up for or protect me. Teachers are worthless for preventing bullying. If they intervene, they can even make it worse. Telling the teacher is like a death sentence. I know because I tried.
  
  The other students did absolutely nothing to stand up for or protect me. Standing up for a kid like that is social suicide and an invitation to bully. That kid is pitiable; but you don't want to be like him, not for a million dollars.
  
  My older brother did absolutely nothing to stand up for or protect me; I had no older brother. I was the oldest.
  
  God did absolutely nothing to stand up for or protect me, in spite of fervent, tearful prayer by an honest true believer. Why this is I leave for you to decide. At the time I decided it was because this was a test I had to face. Now I think it's because he doesn't exist.
  
  I started the 9th grade the smallest kid in high school. Throughout the ninth grade, I faced perhaps the most violent and evil persecution of my entire school career. In wood shop, my projects were cut up on a band saw after I'd invested weeks (and money) into them. My coat was ripped up. I was thrown into the center of rings of other children against my will, to fight some other loser. Following my parent's, and the Society's advice, I always tried to run away from these fights, which got me labeled a coward.
  
  During the 9th grade I had an enormous growth spurt. I started it the smallest, with a high-pitched child's voice. I ended it among the tallest; my voice finally changed; I had hair, etc.
  
  At the start of the 10th grade, the same kids who gave me such hell in the 9th wanted to start up their games again. The first thing that one of these kids said to me, on the first day of school, was "We're gonna hurt you this year."
  
  I was in this class that had high benches facing the walls of the classroom, with tall backless stools that everyone sat on. I was walking by one of these kids and he either said something to me, or stabbed me with his pencil, or kicked me. I don't remember. What I do remember is that I snapped. I grabbed the hair at the top of his had with one hand, and put the other on his chest, and with every ounce of strength I possessed I slammed him to the ground. His head made an audible smacking noise. The wind was knocked out of him and he had trouble breathing. He was stunned.
  
  The teacher grabbed us both by the ears and dragged us out of the classroom. It was his word against mine; and I appeared to be the aggressor. I got a day's suspension. It was the best day of my life.
  
  After that they never bothered me again. Literally. I was bigger than most (but not all) of them. I was known to have strength--I was known to be a fighter--I was known to be mad as hell and not gonna take it anymore.
  
  My advice is to teach your kids to fight back. Teach them to punch, to hit, to kick. Teach them to take care of themselves, and give them permission to do so. Tell them WHEN to hit. Don't teach them to be bullies--but give them a reserve of strength and dignity to draw on. Teach them to stand up for others and to rally others to the same cause. That's what I'm doing with my son and if he ever gets suspended from school for it I'll back him up every inch of the way and tell him I'm proud of him.
  
  Because I won't make the same mistake my parents did. They failed me. To this day, that fact affects our relationship, and they regret it, and there's NOTHING they can do to take it back.
• 

  Warlock

  I was in this class that had high benches facing the walls of the classroom, with tall backless stools that everyone sat on. I was walking by one of these kids and he either said something to me, or stabbed me with his pencil, or kicked me. I don't remember. What I do remember is that I snapped. I grabbed the hair at the top of his had with one hand, and put the other on his chest, and with every ounce of strength I possessed I slammed him to the ground. His head made an audible smacking noise. The wind was knocked out of him and he had trouble breathing. He was stunned.

  Even though this happened many years ago, I'm proud of you, brother.

  Your response is the only "language" they understand. Too bad you didn't send him to the hospital.

  Warlock