Confessing to the elders...

tan

Has anyone ever had to confess their sins to the elders...left out some of the details or "other gross" sins...but wondered if you were truly forgiven of your sins? Or was reproved and given back your priviledges but knew that you didn't tell everything. How did you feel afterward? Always wondered.

tijkmo

nope....spilled my guts..

what an idiot

purplesofa

i lied to them, left something out in a confession that they pointedly asked me......I denied, heck I had already owned up to so much.

It bothered my conscience for what seemed like forever, even though I was already DF. I felt like my lie kept me farther from any blessing I could have recieved from Jehovah.

I just had gotten to a point where I felt like the elders knew enough, and refused to tell them anymore. I would do the same thing now, but without the guilt.

purps

LoverOfTruth

I've come to believe many elders are perverts and enjoying getting the juicy details. They they get further excitement seeing the individual squirm.

karnage

First of all, there is no forgiveness. Second, who in their right mind would just approach the elders and confess to anything?!

Schism

Oh yeah,

First time: While I was spilling my guts about fornication, I decided that they had heard enough and I withheld my secret chronic phone sex addiction, in which I did have an addiction and I did it with lots of different people each night Yeah, they didn't need to know that....... But the guilt followed me CONSTANTLY. I was nauseated with guilt! Guilty, but still having phone sex...

Then, the second time I was in trouble, I wasn't confessing. I got caught doing a few um, things. After I was DFed for a while, I wanted to get reinstated, so I popped my head into the room where my JC was sitting and said, "by the way, I had sex with several married people". Umm, I was sincere in the way I said it, but I think it pissed them off too much to reinstate me then.... This go round, I wasn't so sorry and I was just faking sincerity so I could get back in.

And all before the age of 19..... *sigh*

So stupid

I hate myself (not)

merfi

Gawd I hated that back room...

The first time I went in, I didn't tell them everything... cuz I was continuing to do my bad stuff. Later, I had a concience attack and did go in and confessed it all. Down to the last squicky detail they wanted. :( I was DFd, even though I was emptied and hurting inside, fully repentant. I guess I felt like Jehovah had forgiven me but the 'men' hadn't... it was a little mixed up at that time. So for my RI meeting... I had gone back to doing some 'bad stuff' (ok, it was some big fornicatin', I'll just say it! lol) but wanted RI sooo bad because I missed my friends. So I lied. Got RI anyway. It was at that time that a little lightbulb went off -- how could the elders, who have this holy spirit thing, let me back 'in' if I was still doing stuff jehovah wouldn't approve of and LET me back 'in' for. hmm... could there NOT be HS here?? hmm...

The next time I went in, doing fornicatin' again, I confessed it all. Again. Ok, most. But I felt bad about everything -- and I guess I thought it was the whole feeling and hurting heart that mattered, and that's what the HS was supposed to somehow convey to the elders in the JC. Guess not.... They treated me so badly. Broke me down into a little pile of pieces of self-esteem. I DAd a few days after that -- couldn't do this 'being judged by men' thing anymore

~merfi

Schism

Yeah talk about! That's just what they do, tear you into little pieces and leave you feeling empty. I'll never forget when I finally broke down and was sad, that sonofabitch looked right at me with his little smirk and said "nope, I don't see what i want to see". And he never once opened his Bible. Iasked what I was doing wrong, and he gave me NO explaination. He just said, "when I see it, I'll letcha know". It was like playing a fricking game or something. Guess the card?

Then once I was feeling like I hated them all, I got RI!! LOL, no holy spirit could be that stupid, right? That proves that the DFing thing is stupid. They say it makes you appreciate JW association, but all it did for me was make me very bitter. By the time they let me back in, I had decided to hate everyone even more than I did before!

Confession

Schism, I love you for this...

After I was DFed for a while, I wanted to get reinstated, so I popped my head into the room where my JC was sitting and said, "by the way, I had sex with several married people".

I'm so sorry to find the humor in this, but it just cracked me up. I was both an elder who sat on Judicial Committees--and someone who was the subject of them a number ot times, and I know what it's like to be in a position of telling the truth, but maybe not the whole truth. And the thought of someone doing what you did is both hilarious and really endearing.

Confessing to the elders...

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