she is really a beautiful little girl, its sad !
"Ashley Treatment" keeps severely disabled girl from growing
by Fe2O3Girl 25 Replies latest social current
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SB
i can understand this, but it still bothers me. there are plenty of severely handycap people who's bodies have developed naturally, and they are "fine". it's like this family got to a certain point and they didn't want to accept the new physical challenges of having a handicap daughter. and i agree with the "what if it was a boy?" question! i don't think it's right to create a "non-gender", no matter what the circumstances. there is medicine to relieve cramps. and honestly, how big did they think her boobs were giong to get?
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GetBusyLiving
This is just an awfully sad situation. I don't think its fair to make a snap judgement on the parent's decision.
and honestly, how big did they think her boobs were giong to get?
I heard that all of the woman on the mothers side have incredibly huge breasts.
GBL
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Mulan
not sure I would have thought to do these things, but I can understand why they did it, if the parents are going to be the primary caregivers for her entire life.
A hysterectomy also prevents menstruation, which would just be one more headache for a caregiver to deal with. If those things stunt her growth, that also is a benefit for the problem of lifting her around. As parents age, their ability to do those things would be more and more limited if she grew tall and normal weight, even.
I had a friend in another congregation that had a severely handicapped son, blind, almost deaf, and he was mentally about 2 years old, and some physical issue too, maybe cerebral palsy. The child was a result of incest rape, but she was devoted to him and determined to care for him at home. I read in the newspaper a few years ago that she lost custody of him to the State because he had become violent, and was 17 years old, very tall and large, too much for her to handle. She didn't fight for custody, but it made the news.
So, I understand the dilemma those parents are facing.
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sammielee24
I can say that I honestly thank God that I never had to face such decisions but I have worked with people with mental and physical disabilities, some extremely severe to the point of no vocalization nor mobility. As far as I know, the parents did nothing legally wrong because the operations were authorized by the medical comunity Ethics Committees. As for moral or ethical rights - I'm torn but I will say that I tend to believe that unless someone has lived with/worked with/mentored/volunteered etc with some of these special people, they cannot understand why these decisions would be made. My understanding is that the parents want to keep her at home as long as they and she are alive and the only way to do that is to somehow control her physical growth - they are trying to protect her in the only way they can. I understand that. Society does not always care about nor care for the less fortunate or the less able - point to many of our elderly who are warehoused, so I feel for anyone trying to do what they think is best, because they will be kicked for trying to keep their child at home and safe or they will be kicked for institutionalizing that child and costing the taxpayer money or charged by society for abandonment. I applaud all of those who dedicate their lives to helping people live productive lives and who provide encouragment and support for all to meet their full potential. sammieswife.
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J-ex-W
One person asked about the motivation for the surgeries to prevent sexual maturation, including the breasts. This is to prevent her from becoming a victim of sexual abuse by unscrupulous caregivers, etc. Unfortunately, this kind of thing happens all too often to vulnerable adults, females especially.
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nelly136
my dads 2nd wife was in a wheelchair when he met her, as time went on she became totally imobile she couldnt do anything for herself, i'd get phonecalls to go lift her off the toilet cos his back had given out putting her on the toilet. as she got heavier through immobility it got harder for him to lift her.
another little battle was ensuring she didnt get bedsores.constant need for shifting and turning. looking after his wife was a 24/7 job, he dropped dead of a heart attack at 65 (prolly the only way he could get a rest)
his wife now has two full time nurses day and night doing the things my dad used to do by himself.
this family have chosen to devote their lives to this little girl, she will always be a baby in mind periods and boobs will serve no purpose to her she wont understand why they hurt or get tender, she wont ever grow up get married have kids of her own or a sex life she will be a baby with or without them, but at least her familly are committed to trying to give her a longterm quality of life.
it does sound extreme but having worked with full grown mentally challenged adults who were totally unwanted or unmanageable for their families i can understand where the parents are coming from. its not a choice i'd ever want to be in the position of making.
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Tyrone van leyen
Any way you slice it, it's a heartbreaker, she's so sweet looking and innocent. It must have been tough to make such a decision and sad. For the present, it may not seem a kind act, but the abscence of bed sores and easier mobility is a kindnes to both involved. Hopefully this decision will mean that she remains longer in the company of those that love there "little pillow angel". Sexual maturation will only lead to unfulfilled desire and more sadness, rendering menstruation pointless and making cleanliness an added discomfort again for both parties.
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megsmomma
I have to agree with the parents too...and I think it would be appropriate to do the same type of thing with a male child. If you are mentally remaining child like...I think the body should follow suite. It prevents the person from experienceing things they are not mentally able to handle...In my humble opinion. It is a tough one though.
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lovelylil
I am with LT on this one. It seems like the parents did this to make caring for thier daughter easier for themselves. For instance it was mentioned on the news report I saw that the girl would be easier to lift if they kept her small. And if so, this is very selfish to do. Also, think about all the pain and suffering this young girl had to endure! My mom had breast cancer and suffered terrible after her masectomy. And my sister and others I know have had hysterectomies, also very painful.
I think the whole thing was very unethical and cannot believe that any doctors went along with it. That being said, I have not walked in the parents shoes and may not know all the details about thier decision. Just on the surface, it seems like an insane one. Lilly