by Fisherman 21 Replies latest jw friends
What is your story?
Should you have gone to a psychiatrist for helo?
Perhaps you regret not getting a college ed or pursuing a career?
Would your loved one be alive today?
Was your good name ruined because your sins were made public?
Do you regret not having children?
Do you regret not getting married?
Are you having difficulties now or would you be in a better position now had you not followed the wts policy?
Collage education, my father's veterans benefits would have even been increased if I went, but 'time was too short', I also probably married the non-jw girl next door. That was likely a good thing .
no. my story is a little different than most. they sort of did me a favor by knocking on my door. BUT, THE INTENT WAS THERE! that is what makes me angry. they would have been happy to enslave me and my wife ( who i helped escape) and any children we may produce. those old toothless bastards have really ruined some people. that is why i have a hard on for the a- holes. enough time has gone by since they introduced alot of their doctrine. the first leaders may have been sincere. but at this stage there are so many holes in their teachings that they have to KNOW that they are dead wrong. we can tell by their maneuvering that it is just ass covering time. if they really think they are being backed up by God they wouldnt flip flop on all the major doctrines. they would speak the "truth" boldly, and not make back door deals like the mexico/malawi fiasco or the different blood policies they have for certain countries. jeez! sorry for the rant. i guess you could say they have hurt me. they hurt my feelings. every time i see some poor dub child and know they have a lifetime of enslavement in front of them, it does hurt.
Growing up with no self-esteem is probably the biggest.
The poor relationship I had with my dad because he was an "unbeliever" is another, but that has been remedied, so it's just what we missed out on when I was growing up.
The fiasco of a marriage to a gay man (for 7 years) was a biggie.. but I'm over that now can't you tell?
No college education.. but I'm doin alright without, so no harm no foul
Not having any friends could be considered a big one.. but I've got my Hubby (no, no..not the gay one!) and we do pretty good with just each other.
The years I wasted pioneering and hating every minute of it... it's not like I converted anybody, so, again.. no harm no foul
Hmmmm.. I guess the answer is No, they didn't harm me at all..
Oh, wait, I forgot the whole mom and sisters think I'm evil cause I left bit, but then again, a lot of people would love to have their family leave them alone, so I guess that doesn't count either...
Misty
What is your story?
Way way too long to tell here
Should you have gone to a psychiatrist for helo?
Most definitely but I was scared they would lock me up and never let me out
Perhaps you regret not getting a college ed or pursuing a career?
Well I got that after I left but I sure missed out on getting started before 35 yrs old
Would your loved one be alive today?
Very possibly If the elders had handled the sexual abuse in the family perhaps my aunt and my sister would not have committed suicide
Was your good name ruined because your sins were made public?
Oh lordy yes. Not like I didn't give them something real to talk about but I've sure heard an earful about all the things I was supposed to have done
Do you regret not having children?
I had 2 so this doesn't apply
Do you regret not getting married?
Now just how should I answer this one?
My mother arranged my marriage to a newly baptized JW. I had just turned 18 and he was by a long shot better than some of the much older JWs she tried to marry me off to. But we were both too young and neither of us had dealt with our physical and sexual abuse pasts when we were young. It was a train wreck waiting to happen
Are you having difficulties now or would you be in a better position now had you not followed the wts policy?
Well I think I wore my feet out walking all over the place hawking WT litterature. This is a lot more real than I would like to think considering that after 4 years of tests I can't find one doctor who has a clue about what is wrong with my feet. Maybe I would have met a really nice non-JW guy and had a good life (but then I wouldn't have my daughters). Maybe I would have gotten the help I needed before I had children. But then again there weren't many people dealing with this and few counselors knew how to help
I am all jacked up like alot of you are/were.
Treatment I was given after being molested was wrong.
Being raised to be a self righteous, self satisfied brat was wrong. On the second, it was probably a combination of my personality, my upbringing at home and my religious training. As I think of it now, the worst part was my personality(even good things generally) combined with the religious training. I have a serious need to please people(my brother doesn't remember going to ANY meetings, but I remember him at them when we were little-he was out of it by the time we were in kindergarden or first grade(he could live with not pleasing mom), I want to be loved, and of course they train up JWs to feel superior to everyone else. Combine that with a legalistic mind of my own, an argumentative and 'logical' mind, and I was probably so conflicted with all the messages I was getting and giving that its amazing I survived adolescence.
I watch my family members destroyed by this 'faith' and can't say anything-or I will be shunned-because they think its the right thing to do. The good thing is no one farther than my mom's generation is in (With dozens of extended family members who are JW's)I was the only hope of my generation and that was 25 years ago. Dozens of cousins/seconds, and such have left (or died-and I will give the wT some credit in both deaths). I guess it will make for some good stories as that last generation dies off. . .that is, if the big "A" doesn't get us!
