I hate my mother, that Jehovah created.

by vomit 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • truthsetsonefree
    truthsetsonefree

    I understand exactly what you are saying. Most of these women do this because they end up neglecting their health for the Watchtower organization. In addition to my own Mom, we just had a sister in my last congregation who bled intermittently for two years. She refused to see any doctors, opting instead to pionner and try to make money selling cheap jewelry. Finally after she became so weak that it became difficult to go out in "service" a sensible elder encouraged her to see a gyn. Of course she had no insurance. But she managed to use public health care.It wasn't long before she had a full hysterectomy. But I wondered, what if she had attcked the problem early. She had fibroids, a common problem that can be handled without the full trauma.

    As for the idols, you couldn't have said it better. I have seen this too. Not to mention the "idolatry" evidenced by their worship of the ten Governing Body men.

    tsof

  • Mysterious
    Mysterious
    I can never know when it is the religion or the person speaking

    The person is speaking when they love you for who you are and do not try to change you or blackmail you for the sake of religion. The religion is speaking when there is talk of destruction, conditional love, and hate on the basis of faith.

  • Seeking The Truth
    Seeking The Truth

    I hate my mother too! My mother stood up in my face and told me that Jehovah will replace me with new children in the "New System of Things" because I read Raymond Franz' book Crisis of Conscience. How do you argue with her? I have been trying so hard to find something that I can actually use to make her see the real light!! I was brought up a JW so my childhood was anything but ordinary. My father was disfellowship a long time ago for smoking and then my mother fell away. Only recently having started a new job with a co-worker is a JW has she become fanatical.

    They are going on a trip to Bethel (from Alabama) riding a bus full of JW and she was indignant that I didn't love Jehovah because I refused to go (she was paying afterall). If there is anyone out there who has taken the Bethel tour, maybe you can answer this for me: will they see behind the scenes or only a carefully arranged tour? Will they eat any meals at the long tables in the cafeteria that week?

    I am trying to find some piece of material that will help me convince my mother that this is not Jehovah's organization. She is not concerned with any of the inaccurate predictions for Armageddon saying the Bible says no man knows the date or the hour. I ask her who has been keeping up with the 144,000 since biblical days began until 1914/1918/1935 when the vancancies were supposedly filled and she said Jehovah has, that he is the Time Keeper. When I asked her why I can't worship Jehovah privately without the aide of the WTS, she quoted the passage about "...where two or more are gathered" so it isn't possible to believe in Jehovah without the WTS because that is Jehovah's organization. Enough already. I can't argue with her I suppose because I don't have enough material to present her with. When I told her about the Beth Sarin house she didn't know anything about it but believed that if the WTS President built it and deeded it to the Oldies then it must be for a good reason.

    She keeps reminding me that the WTS is a non-profit organization and that they give the literature away. I remember distinctly when she purchased it from the Kingdom Hall then sold it at the "cost of printing". Why has this changed? If the WTS is so rich why don't they distribute the wealth to helping each congregation pay the light bill rather than having each congretion pay the expenses for a Bethel Brother to come give a talk?

    My mother has built a library of all of the old yearbooks, every book that was pratically ever written by the WTS, and yes, even the old records! She didn't find it odd that they used to play the phongraph at people's doors at all. Now she tapes every talk and converts them into CD. She has gone off the deep end.

    Now she is drilling me to go to the Memorial. This would be the first year not being in attendance. Should I go because Jesus commands us to "do this in Memorial of Me"? If I don't do it at the Kingdom Hall, where else can do this in rememberance of him? Can anyone help me with this? I am going insane!!

  • reneeisorym
    reneeisorym
    Something very bad happened to me as a child, but I ended up repeatedly consoling her. Her faith was shaken because of it, and in a way I was made feel like I was bad for shaking her faith. Emotional blackmail such as "Do you want me to leave Jehovah for you" kept on popping up, to which I responded that she should carefully examine what that religion teaches and I can help her if she needs. Well the investigation never transpired, but something else hurt me a lot.

    How may JW Women in their 50's plus in your congregation do you know with so many major operations, how high is the count of Breast Cancer and Hysterectomies? I know people like to talk about how they overcame challenges in life, I commend them, but when there are alternatives it sickens me to see people making the wrong decision. If I did a survey of the same amount of women in my workplace, I wouldn't even get half the number of women who had to go through this.

    I don't literally hate my mother, I hope this story shows its not really so, but I just feel like a shaking shell of a person, because I am so unsympathetic about the trials that JWs go though, I can never know when it is the religion or the person speaking, and I don't know what I can do to help these people. I can barely help myself get other being a child of Jehovah and I hate what Jehovah requires of Parents.

    I think I hate my mother too! Or at least the JW version of her. I know exactly what you mean by there being two versions of her. I remember talking to her one time and talking to the real her and getting frustrated. Sometimes I would call "Just to say hello" and hang up when I got the JW one and actually talk when i got the real one. It really sucked because when I did try to show her that it wasn't Jehovah's organization, she fussed at me and say, "Are you happy now? You've made me question everything I've ever believed." She blamed it on me. My mom was never a mother to me -- she also was a zombie who spouted out quotes and I had to then take care of her.

    My mother suffered from depression, acid reflux disease to the point of ulsers from stress, fibromyalsia/CFS, heel spirs and pain all over, and a weight problem due to eating while stressed (she always lost lots of weight while things where good and gained it all back from eating boxes of cakes and things.) My mother is also a prescription drug addict. I think she took like 10 different things a day last time we talked.

    Now she won't talk to me and blames it on me because I left Jehovah. She blames it on me. And I think what sucks is that I've really made something of myself but she will never be proud of me.

    Look, I understand how you feel and I believe I am still having a lot of problems due to being raised in a cult. I really am doing well -- much better since I left. I hope things continue to get better for you as well.

  • Virgochik
    Virgochik

    I was lucky (OOPS! fortunate) that for the most part, my Mom was pretty stable and loving. She used to play games with me after supper, like Parcheesi and Monopoly. Occasionally she'd freak out when I was a teenager because I wasn't spiritual enough.

    What aggravates the piss life out of me, though, is how clueless about life she is. She lived her whole life in a sheltered JW Stepford wife bubble. She greeted Dad at the door in her gingham apron, had dinner ready, and sat modestly at the Hall. She has no idea what I'm talking to her about, when I tell her work is really stressful, lots of overtime, etc. No clue what it's like at all, to work and earn a living. To pay a mortgage, or make a car payment.

    I too, wonder what she could've been, what talents she might have displayed if she'd done more with herself than cook, sew and pioneer. Not that I'm saying every wife should have a job outside the home, but I do wish she could have developed herself more, enjoyed dabbling in her talents and interests, if she hadn't lived in this little witness wife cage. Well, now she's a sweet little old lady and I do love her anyway. Sad, tho.

  • vomit
    vomit

    "The person is speaking when they love you for who you are and do not try to change you or blackmail you for the sake of religion. The religion is speaking when there is talk of destruction, conditional love, and hate on the basis of faith."

    Sorry Mysterious but it doesn't work that easily, you never know what they will do to try and get you back. They will down right lie, even as far as saying that the religion is not the same as when `you` grew up.

  • Billzfan23
    Billzfan23

    Just thought everyone who hasn't should see this post, so I gave it a bump.com

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