My dad took my copy of CoC!!!!

by Rayvin 13 Replies latest social family

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  Rayvin

  Sorta. I took the advice that i was given here to go to the library for a copy of CoC. I was at my dads last weekend and went to his library with him. They didn't have it in but would order it. I would be visiting again in a week so that was good. Then dad tried to find a book and they had to order it too. I heard her tell him that our books would be in at the same time. (he didn't hear what book i ordered). I talked to him on Friday about me coming over on Sunday and he said that he got his book and some other book that he didn't order. When i showed up and mom was out of the room I asked him if he looked at the book. He said no. I just opened the book to where it said -written by Ray Franz former member of the Governing Body of Jehovahs Witnesses. You would have thought I showed him a fairy with the reaction I got. Like.. OH my.. what is this...where did you get it... !!! He immediately wanted to scan through it and started reading the letters in the back of the book while i chatted with my mom in the back room to keep her away. Later back in the living room he tried to whisper something to me about the book in front of mom- i didn't understand. Later he repeated that "I want to read the book too!" !!!!!!! What??!!!!!! We were going to the meeting cause my youngest daughter wanted to dress up and go somewhere so we killed a few birds with one visit stone. It was also to support dad. I took the book with me to the meeting .. sorta like an anchor so that i didn't get sick to my stomach during the talk. We got a good dose of guilt trip about watching TV like a drug instead of doing spiritual study. When dad saw me bringing the book out of the house he said " I thought you were gonna let me read it!'. lol I left it with him and said I would let him read it and i would get a copy from a friend. He is starting to back away from reading it already and its only been a day. Its like too much truth at once. I can't believe my dad is reading the book before me !!!!! lol

  Rayvin
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  juni

  Wow Rayvin!

  That was a grabber of a title for your Topic! I'm thinking, "ah, here we go again." And then I read the rest of your post. That's great! Like you I feel he has to have time to digest it all. One reason I like CofC - because Ray doesn't fill it w/hateful words, but presents the facts. While reading it myself, it was a real eye opener to say the least!

  Keep us updated. It will take Dad time to absorb it and he probably will fight the "truth" in his mind. Should lead to some very productive conversations.

  Juni
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  Brigid

  Its like too much truth at once.

  Interesting. My two cents, for whatever it is worth, would be to just honor the pace at which he is willing to take everything in. This is pretty traumatic stuff when you think about it. Especially if he is older and has devoted his whole life to this organization and their beliefs. To find be confronted with the idea that everything you've been taught and built your life around was based on lie after lie after lie is life changing. Obviously, he is questioning....again, I'd say just let him set the pace as you just continue to be there for him however, whenever he needs you as he journies one step at a time.

  You've opened a door, let him decide how far in he can come through. He may just poke his head in from time to time. Remember there is a lot of fear hardwired into the witness schema. These things must be handled delicately, in my opinion.

  Good luck! You're doing all the right things.

  Love and Light,

  ~Brigid
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  reneeisorym

  I am SOOO excited for you!!!

  Congrats!
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  JeffT

  Funny story, which I've posted before. In the Spring of 1988 I was seriously questioning what I was hearing. Our older children were going into middle school and I could no longer buy into the "no education beacuse the world is ending" nonsense. There had been a big assembly part about it at the CA in February which started me looking around. I was reading CofC on the sly as I had no idea how my wife would react. So one Sunday morning we're sitting around skipping meeting - because I didn't want to go and my wife was having health issues. So I look up from my coffee and see her coming out of the bedroom with the book in her hand. I'm thinking "oh shit, here it comes" when she grins and says "this is my copy!" She'd been cleaning, found my copy where I'd hidden it under my side of the bed, figured out what was going on and pulled her copy out from where she'd hidden it under her side of the bed.

  We DA'd oursleves officially in March 1989, but by then we'd celebrated Halloween, Christmas and voted. I don't think any half-thinking person can read Franz's book and stay a JW.
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  abbagail

  Great story! Can't wait for the follow-up.
  
  Even if your Dad got a little "cold feet" (read: probable guilt trip) after the fact, there's no way he'll be able to forget the large-lettered-Title of the book: CRISIS OF CONSCIENCE!
  
  Even if years go by before he reads it (let's hope not), but IF... he'll NEVER forget that title in the interim. It's a "sure draw" -- as is Franz' other title: CHRISTIAN FREEDOM! ;-)
  
  /ag
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  abbagail

  And Great Story for JeffT, too. That's a good one.
  
  I bet things like that hardly EVER happen... both spouses sneakily reading CofC at the same time, lol, and keeping it from each other. Too funny.
  
  /ag
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  Paisley

  I took the book with me to the meeting .. sorta like an anchor so that i didn't get sick to my stomach during the talk.

  And that's just great to hear your dad's interested in reading the book!
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  Rayvin

  Brigid- thanks for the response. I was remembering the first time my eyes were forced open by logic and how scary it was. It was my first husband before we were married. I had found out I was pregnant and told him we can't celebrate xmas..etc. He asked me why- i said cause its pagen. He told me almost everythign has pagen origin. Who is the person selected to pick and choose what we can or can't do. What criteria makes one thing no longer pagen..etc. It sounded logical but it went against everything i knew. I freaked out and hid in my closet crying and rocking myself in order to calm down. That led to my eyes being open to other things. I fought against it at first but logically knew i couldn't win. I think dad is at the point to where his eyes are open and he isn't fighting tooth and nail .. maybe just tooth. He is aware that the way he is thinking and if he is found out reading this book that its considered apostasy. He knows it would be wrong to consider it apostasy since it is just logical. He almost cried the other day thinking about what me and my brother went through and feels its his fault for not seeing this sooner. I told him it is all okay.I told him we are good kids and love him very much and know that its not his fault. He adds" yea.. i was just doing what every one was / is doing".

  Rayvin
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  Brigid

  Rayvin,

  I'm so happy for you and your brother and now hopefully your father--who knows, maybe a family Christmas is in our future someday (to include extended family...friends....and girlfriends )