I just learned about the Society's connection with the UN and I'm shocked. I had been experiencing doubts before but this new information is like a slap in the face. Before I begin with the questions I should probably start with a introduction.
I'm a 29 year old married man serving as a minsterial servant in the south suburbs of Chicago. I was born and raised in the truth initially by my mother and father. My father had many problems with drugs, adultery and other undesirable habits and he was eventually disfellowshiped. A few years later after the birth of my younger brother he left the family. My mother continued attending the meetings and did her best to raise my brother and myself up as witnesses.
I became a baptized witness at the age of 13 shortly after I had entered into high school. I had my share of issues as most young people my age did. I think one of the biggest issues that teens have to face is dealing with peer pressure and sex, at least it was in my case. Although I never actually committed fornication I came as close as you can get. This eventually caught up with me and the elders in my congregation put me on private reproof. I have to say that the brothers were very loving and they did'nt try to make me feel like a criminal but they really were sincere in looking after my interests. Unfortnately some of my friends had to deal with elders who were very harsh when it came to spiritual discipline.
After that little incident I tried my best to stay on the right course. I eventually was appointed as a ministerial servant in my congregation and I did fairly well for a few years. However being young and still trying to fight sexual desires was a big challenge for me. I ended up again coming very close to committing fornication. Even though I did'nt actually have sex with the women I was involved with the things that I did do would have been enough to be considered for reproof or disfellowshipping. I felt very bad about what I had done but I did'nt tell the elders I instead prayed about it and tried to do my best in the congregation by continuing with field service, talks and meeting attendance.
I eventually met a sister from another congregation. She was the daughter of the presiding overseer and a regular pioneer, her family had a reputation as being very strong spiritually. We began dating and eventually were married about 4 years ago. Things were fine for the first 3 years but then I began having doubts. I kept them to myself and tried to remain content in the fact that I was with God's organization. The doubts were still there however and I eventually began doing research by means of the internet. I was very skeptical at first about what I was reading because as witnesses we are constantly being warned about apostate literature that could damage our spirituality. But as I continued to do research I realized that there were a lot of things that the society had kept quiet about. Also the constant changing of doctrine and the many failed predictions and understandings about certain dates made my doubts increase.
Just recently as of 2 weeks ago on a Thursday night I told my wife about how I felt. I had casually hinted to her about my feelings previously but this was the first time that I was really frank with her about all of my findings. I showed her various publications where the society had placed emphasis on the date of 1975 as being a year of significance. The society did not flat out say that 1975 would be the end of the system of things as some friends had previously thought. However they did place a lot of emphasis on that date and they even went on to say that armageddon would occur in a matter of weeks or months within the date of October 1975. My wife basically dismissed my findings by saying that the Society was infallible and that they never claimed to be a perfect human organization. I countered by saying if the Society is truly inspired by God how is it possible they would have incorrect information. We discussed my doubts about the organization for at least another 2 hours that night before going to bed emotionally exhausted. The next day on Friday my wife said very little to me. When we got home later that evening from work she talked to her father about our conversation despite the fact that I had asked her not to discuss it with anyone before I had a chance to speak with the elders in my congregation.
Naturally I was a bit upset and I told her so, after she left to attend the meeting that Friday night I made the decision that I was'nt going back to the Kingdom Hall. I had planned on letting the Presiding Overseer know that I was stepping down as a minsterial servant the next day.
Saturday morning came around and I decided to try and make an effort to share my feelings again with my wife. We went for a drive and tried to talk but she eventually broke down in tears and we cut our drive off short that morning. I ended up spending the day with a few of my close friends, I figured that once it became known I was'nt attending meetings anymore I'd have little to no contact with them.
Sunday morning my wife left for the Kingdom Hall and I stayed at home to try and sort out my thoughts on this whole matter. Later that afternoon when she came home she told me that she had began crying during the meeting. One of the elders happened to notice and he took her aside and asked if everything was ok. After listening to what the issue was the elder and my brother-in-law who is also an elder told my wife that they would come by my home to speak with me. Again I was disappointed that all of this was being carried before I was ready to deal with it. But under the circumstances I could understand why my wife was feeling so emotional.
About an hour after my wife had returned home from the meeting and related to me what transpired the elders knocked on the door. The meeting with them was not as bad as I thought it might have been. I tried to be honest and I told them about my doubts and about the research I had done. They mildly reminded me I should'nt have been looking at negative teachings and they answered my questions as best as they could. Unfortunately their answers were basically a rehash of what I already knew, (wait on Jehovah, the light is getting brighter, the brothers are imperfect) despite it all I decided I would try to be patient and reapply myself to studying, meeting attendance and the field ministry.
Well here it is 2 whole weeks later and I'm still plagued with nagging doubts. Anyway to kind of wrap this story up I began going back to the internet to look up information and thats when I learned about the UN and the Society. I'm pretty convinced at this point that I know what I need to do but unfortunately the decision is still difficult.
If you've read this far thanks for listening.
The questions that I mention in the outset of this post are:
Why has knowledge of this relationship not been made known before now?
Has the Society admitted or acknowledged their relationship with the UN?
Are all religious organizations required to have some type of connection with the UN?
Could the fact that the Society has international interests mean that its a necessity to have links with the UN?
Thanks for any help on answering these questions