Yiz: Hey, congrats on being married. I looked up your old posts and found the link to the photo album of your wedding. I'm glad things are working out for you, and I hope you are happy. You seem it in the photo's.
In the year 2000, I quit smoking. 2 pack a day, used to smoke Marlboro or Salem lights back then. It was rough at first, but I remember these milestones on how many Weeks/Months/Years I've been SMOBER. I used to post on alt. support. stop.smoking (or something like that) on Usenet back then and the people who posted there at that time were very helpful. I got one of those nifty "SMOBER" calculators that would tell me the amount of Cigs I NOT smoked, the money I saved...(what was it $2.60/$2.70 a pack back in 2000 I think), and the number of days I added to my life.
I remember during that time, I would sometimes dream that I was smoking again. I would wake up dissapointed in myself for a sec, then realize it was just a dream, and say, Thank God!.
Fast forward 5 years. It was November 05. I had to drive to our Sterling, VA office that day. For some reason, I can't explain, I started to think of Cigarettes again. It was very overwhelming to me...Like...I just wanted a Cigarette. It wasn't a particluarly bad day at work. Usual pain in the ass stuff, but nothing really out of the ordinary. After I left the office that day, I stopped around the corner at the Amoco Station for Gas, Beef Jerky, and a Soda...(Oh, I gained about 70 pounds after I quit). I didn't like my weight. As I was paying for everything, I glanced at the cigarette rack behind the counter, and scanned the brands. Saw the usual brands, so I thought that to satisfy my craving, I'd ask for a brand that I didn't see. This way, if the clerk says, sorry, we don't carry that brand, then I can say at least I asked, and hopefully I'd get it out of my system. I thought and chose on Camel Unfiltered so just in case I wound up buying a pack, I'd by the strongest cigarette I can think of to make me sick, and barf all over the Dulles Toll Road. (Believe me, you don't need a cigarette to barf on the Dulles Toll Road). So, I asked the clerk if they have Camel Unfiltered. He said, sure, reached underneith the counter where I couldn't see and pulled out a pack. Shit!!! OK, I bought the pack. It was a moment of weakness. So, I settled back and started my 2 hour drive back home and brave the Capitol Beltway. But the pack was in my car.....Calling me.....El Kabong......El Kabong......put me in your mouth......suck on me......(get all your minds out of the gutter!!), So I "reasoned" that I may as well smoke one, get sick and get it out of my system. WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I got that old nicotine buzz back, which helped considerably being stuck in traffic over the American Legion Bridge. Well, one lead to another. Soon I was up to 5 Cigarettes a day, then finally, one pack, which is where I'm at today.
The point to this is......RESIST ALL URGES YOU MAY GET. You may feel like you have this licked. Guess what, you do...Today! But, try to never give in. Just one will make you go back to this filthy habit.
Wishing you the best....