How long can you go to the meetings and not get baptized?

by JH 24 Replies latest jw friends

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  Bonnie_Clyde

  A friend of ours has been going with his wife to meetings for about 43 years. He is the nicest, most balanced person I know. He is also very wealthy. His wife hasn't had to work since she was very young, she gets a generous allowance, and makes substantial contributions. She also likes to wine and dine the CO and his wife. He's never gone from door to door but occasionally would tag along on a Bible study. Nobody can understand why he doesn't want to get baptized, but he won't and has confided to Clyde that he never will. They have two disfellowshipped (grown) children, and the wife is just sure that if he would just get baptized, the children would come back to the organization and everyone would be happy. That will also never happen.

  The congregation loves him, but maybe it's just his money.

  Bonnie
• 

  asleif_dufansdottir

  Bonnie,
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  asleif_dufansdottir

  OK, the cat walking across the keyboard is not a good thing sometimes.

  Anyway, I was gonna say, Bonnie -

  Money does make a difference. A big one. There were a few in our congregation who were adults who were never baptised, never went in service, and were not interested in doing so.

  In most cases they were 'unbelieving mates' (unbelieving *husbands* can get away with this much easier than unbelieving *wives*...my personal experience). However, in one case, the guy was the adult son of a widow who was a JW (I don't think his dad had ever been a JW either) was married and had a little kid of his own, and neither he nor his wife were ever publishers or baptised, but they attended meetings for years. He had a beard, too.

  As long as they were supportive of their JW family, and gave donations at the hall, they were left mostly alone. Every once in a while, a new CO or somebody came in with a full head of steam and put a lot of pressure on people, but I'm pretty sure if they pressed too hard they'd lose, and *they knew it*.
• 

  betteroffdead

  so far 23 years. but i do get nagged ALOT!and the shunning has been going on to, but that does really get to me cause most everyone there are jackholes. and all my real friends are "wordly" anyways so whooptee-doo!
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  AllAlongTheWatchtower

  My wife only attended meetings for about a year, thankfully, but a few of the people she knew had begun calling her 'sister' even then, and she was never baptized. My own personal background is in the Worldwide Church of God; though I don't think they would have outright turned people away for just hanging around for years and years, I cannot recall anybody who did so. There were always references to scriptures such as "...because thou art lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spew thee out of my mouth." and others being quoted to motivate people into being more active, and doing what they said. IF anybody was ever tempted to just attend services and never actually join, I'm guessing that sort of thing turned them away.

  Also, the congregation itself had a tendency to look down on folks who were just 'hangers on'. From reading here, I've learned that JWs call potential recruits 'interested ones'. In the WWCG, they were called 'prospective members', and sometimes just PMs for short. I remember as a child hearing older members joking about so-and-so being a PPM. This was WWCG insider talk for a 'perpetual prospective member' or various alternatives of that, with the first P being Potential, Perpetual, Perspective (looks like but isn't), or whatever the joke of the week was. This was the prevailing attitude amongst most toward anyone who didn't jump in right away, thinly disguised on the surface by a veneer of friendliness and welcome. I'm sure many who might have hung around longer sensed this as well, and were repulsed by it.