just one question

by beepers 16 Replies latest jw friends

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  SixofNine

  However, what's the point of living forever if none of the rest of my family won't be there. (I was the only JW in the family)

  Well, to the spiritually greedy, spiritually materialistic type person, for which much of the bible was written, and most religions are for, Jesus' own words (Matt 10: 35...) would come to mind: "For I came to cause division, with a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a young wife against her mother-in-law. Indeed, a man's enemies will be persons of his own household. He that has greater affection for father or mother than for me is not worthy of me, and he that has greater affection for son or daughter than for me is not worthy of me." If you read on a couple of sentences from there, you see that it is all about getting "rewards".

  When I took a hard look at the Witness dogma, it didn't stand up to scrutiny, and in fact my beliefs were literally killing me with depression. Getting out from under the control of those evil puppeteers in Brooklyn may have saved my life. BUT, and this is a very big and important "but", taking an honest, critical look at the Bible and seeing it for the rather silly yet death-dealing mythology that it is, has allowed me to really LIVE. And that, my friend is the greatest gift I will be giving to my young daughter.

  She will not grow up thinking that Abraham's willingness to sacrifice Isaac was a good thing.

  No greater gift has any man for his children than to not burden them with evil stories of old Hebrew tribes - things about which he knows nothing, under the guise of teaching Gods thoughts.

  Except as revealed through nature, Gods thoughts remain unrevealed (and some argue even that point quite effectively). Anyone who says different, is horribly misguided, often a liar, or just plain mentally ill. Or at least that is my opinion, I certainly think I have Gods spirit in saying so

  And if my words, direct to you from the spirit , don't make an impact on you, at least listen to the other fine advice you have gotten. The things you can learn on this discussion board, and by reading Crisis of Concience and other such books, can free you from a great burden, and make a very positive impact in your daughters life.

  You owe it to her to unburden yourself of bad beliefs.
• 

  NoLongerAjw

  OH i know how you feel!!!! i have been inactive for 3 years now.. i had elders come tell me about 4 months ago that since i wasnt going to meetings.. my 3 year old boy and my 8 month old girl were going to die because of me!!! talk about a guilt trip.. it bothered me for days but i relized that they are just trying to scare me to come back.. those feelings will go away.. if you would like to talk fell free to email me anytime..
• 

  lauralisa

  How many people stay 'loyal' to the organization because of fear? Countless thousands, no doubt.

  I always enjoy your posts, jst2laws, because they do remind me of what seeking God is all about - love. We learn about love from God, and the natural response God would like to illicit -it seems safe to assume - is that that we would learn to love ourselves and others.

  Fear and threats do not inspire love or devotion... they dehumanize us. I want my children to love me because they are secure in their relationship with me, NOT because I'll kill them and all of their pets and stuffed animals if they don't behave in a particular set of capricious manners.

  It has been my experience that extricating oneself from the tight mind control that kept us in "formation" (from another thread; struck me as particularly poignant) takes quite a bit of time and mental effort..... the curve goes up... with some ups and downs all along. There is good company here.

  Let us know how things go for you, beepers, please?

  lauralisa

  It's only water from a stranger's tear (Peter Gabriel)
• 

  betweenworlds

  Yeah, had a pioneer sister try and lay a guilt trip similar to those mentioned above. While visiting me one day she said "so how old are your boys now?" I told her 5. She shook her head sadly, looked up at me and said "How sad, that for 5 years your boys haven't known Jehovah" needless to say I was just a tad annoyed!!!!!!!! How dare this woman presume to know what my children have or have not been taught! Just because I don't go to the kingdom hall, my children have no spirituality?? GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

  betweenworlds

  "The important thing is to not stop questioning" Albert Einstein
• 

  Ranchette

  Beepers,
  You have gotten some good advice so far. I just want to add that when I quit going to meetings I was terrified because I was so confused even though I was resolved in my decision to leave the organization.

  I remember that fear you describe. We as parents take our responsibilities seriously and would never want to be the cause of harm to them.Also If your like some of us your fears are compounded by what JW friends and family say to you.

  What you are feeling is normal. You were taught that Jews have all the answers and when you realize that’s not true and you find that Jah really isn’t behind them your still scared because you feel God expects you to have all the answers or else! Also you were taught not to trust yourself.
  That simply is not true. That is left over from what you were taught before.

  We were also taught conflicting things about God. We were taught he is a God of love and understanding and also a harsh and demanding one.
  What helped calm me down the most was this discussion board and reading. They have both been a life saver as far as my mental and emotional state.

  Someone already recommended one or two great books but one I’d like to add to your list is by Steven Hassen called Combating Cult Mind Control.
  This book will help you deal with those fears and destructive thought patterns.

  If you continue your journey and not get paralyzed in one-place things will get much better for you.
  Ranchette
• 

  teejay

  Beepers,

  As a Witness, I accepted the fact that very few of my "worldly" family/friends would survive the impending great trib. and Armageddon. I thought that since I'd be alive for a long time (forever) those people would eventually be forgotten. Until then, I figured Jehovah would help me cope with my personal loss.

  peace,
  tj

  You shall know the truth and the truth will set you free, but first it is going to make you incredibly miserable.

  -- Brenda Clark
• 

  rhett

  That very thought is the straw that broke the camel's back with me. There were a lot of things that I didn't like about the Borg but the thought that my newborn son would be killed because my wife and I didn't buy their brainwashing is what pushed me over the edge.