Would You Recommend A Person Remain A Virgin Before Marriage??? (page 3)

minimus

So, from the feedback, I'm thinking one should defintely sleep with others before marriage.

What-A-Coincidence

one should defintely sleep with others

period

For myself, I prefer to wait. Too many guys out there want you for sex and sex only. I would feel really used if I had sex with someone, got pregnant or an STD and he took off. It really is a personal choice.

lonelysheep

Not at all.

I'd recommend a person NOT equate sex with a legal contract, EVER.

AK - Jeff

Would You Recommend A Person Remain A Virgin Before Marriage???

Probably this is preferable to remaining a virgin after marriage.

Jeff

Kudra

Yes, you definitely need to have experienced more than one person before you marry. That way you can get all the weird experiences out of your system and then sex can be one more thing that can help you form your opinion of what type of guy you want to end up marrying.

That said, there will always be people and experiences from your past that can make the other person feel uncomfortable, make them feel that they don't quite stack up to previous experiences etc.

So do what you have to do but don't talk about it positively to the one you are with right now...

asleif_dufansdottir

I'd like to know if those who didn't remain virgin before marriage, if they regret it.

Yeah, well, when I was young and naive and first married, (and dumb) I did regret not being a virgin a little, not that my husband cared (he wasn't, either). Now that I'm middle aged, what I regret was not having better taste in pre-marital men.

I think a person should have a considerable amount of LIFE experience, including sex, before they get married. I've notice that those who get married later in life (often after a bad first marriage) are happier and more content.

ex-nj-jw

Absolutly NOT!!!

I have three boys and my speil to them about sex:

1. Use a condom

2. Use a condom

3. Use a condom

4 Respect the person you are with, especially if the relationship comes to an end, and use a condom

5. No means no, use a condom

6. Never play the field, always give the other person the choice to be in the relationship or not if you decide you want to see other people, Use a condom!!!

7 IF SHE SAYS SHE HAS A CONDOM, PUT HERS ON AND YOURS ON TOP!!!!

8. USE A CONDOM

Mystla

does one need to LIVE with a person that they are involved with to see that they are gay? REALLY! If you didn't see that before you married him than you must be blind in my opinion.

Agape... hmm, a loving name to go with an unloving attitude. I didn't know he was gay until we had been married 7 years. Am I an idiot? No, but I was fooled by someone who had been advised to get married so his "unnatural feelings would go away" My marriage was a sham, I was the closet door.

Living together before we got married may not have provided me with the information that he was gay, but it would have let me in on the secret that he wasn't very interested in sex. I could have saved myself 7 years of losing my self-esteem. I was a good little JW wifey, so I of course, blamed any marital problems on myself.

Were there clues? Of course, and I can see them clear as day with hindsight. But I was so naive when we got married.. when someone says they love you and want to marry you... you aren't looking for signs of gayness..

And, just for your information, not all gays act different than heterosexuals. The only really obvious clue was his lack of interest in sex.. but there are many things that can cause that, it doesn't neccesarily point to a lust for the same sex.

And I was blind, blind to the fact that a "loving brother" could be so deceptive. Blind to the fact that the "loving shepherds" could tell a man to marry an innocent girl to cover up the fact that he was gay. And most of all.. blind to the fact that I was part of a cult, a pool of deception so deep it's a wonder I ever found my way out.

You are the blind one, Agape.. all that "new light" shining in your eyes, I guess.

Misty

(thank you Buttlight, a little support goes a long way)

Gill

ex-nj-jw - So you think a condom is a good idea then?

Best advice I've ever heard from anyone!!!

Would You Recommend A Person Remain A Virgin Before Marriage???