Now my wife would like to say something (she's not regestered yet)" Hi everyone... not too sure how this works... basically I just needed to talk to someone and feel that people can understand what an emotional day it's been for me! I'm the third JW generation in my family, everybody in my family is a JW, aside from me. I'm the black sheep of the family, always has been. My mom is very very serious about the JW, life without them there is no life at all... my oldest sister passed away a year ago, April 10th. I guess my mom thought it might make me change my mind about the JW since my sister was ''faithfull" till the end.... but it didn't change a thing, actually it just made me more angry about the whole thing! Anyways I'll talk about that some other time... what I am trying to say is that I announced to her today that I wasn't going to the memorial... and my goodness, she didn't take it well at all, especially since I am pregnant of our first child, I guess she figured, like my step-father said" we'd be responsible" and go back to the JW to raise our kid... yeah RIGHT! So I guess today was a real shock for her to find out we weren't going to the memorial. She really freaked out and asked me why, in her authoritive voice (created I guess by 64 years in the JW :) So anyways I told her I didn't see the interest in it and that basically every year they say the same thing over and over "if you only come to the memorial it's not enough" so why should I bother going, I don't see the point. She didn't like that at all and decided to end the conversation by saying "well I respect that and well have a nice day" and she hung up.
I felt really bad... I didn't feel bad cause I was missing it but because it feels like I am always dissapointing her and feels like I am making her cry wayyyyyyy too often! It's simply hard to acknowledge that she is the one causing herself all this pain, I guess she'll have all her friends tonight to hold her in her arms when she cries about it at the hall... I guess that is her "real family" since today for her, we sank really low!!!!
Anyways it was nice writting about it, hope I'm not boring your guys with this stuff, just had to get it all out! See you around."