Help me describe the idealized JW fantasyland

by sir82 36 Replies latest jw friends

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  sir82

  I wasn't even thinking of the future fantasyland! So...

  ...don't forget the invisible elves who will supply the burgeoning milennial resurrected population with pollution-free plastic for beach balls and shoes (which of course will no longer be made of leather from slaughtered animals)...

  ...and the millions of hand-powered bellows-driven blacksmith shops, also presumably run by those same invisible elves, who will supply the nails, horseshoes, farm implements, etc. for those 20 billion persons...

  ...and the enormous textile industries that somehow manage to produce ethnically-accurate clothing in vibrant colors, of course all of which are pollution-free...once again run by those invisible elves, as the JWs & resurrected ones will be too busy constructing 5000 square foot homes and carrying baskets of fruit around all day...

  ...and of course don't forget the geological changes to come! All 20 billion people will have either mountainside or beachfront property upon which to build their 5000+ square foot homes...which, by the way, are cleaned by invisible elves...
• 

  MidwichCuckoo

  Hello ninja I'm still sniggering over the pound on a piece of string..

  There were LOADS of sex scandels in the OT too - bet the Dubs can't wait for the Resurrection so they can arrange a few JCs to get the nitty gritty.
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  ninja

  yeah middy...I can just imagine it..."brother noah...school 3"!!!..."now"!!!
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  BizzyBee

  Beach balls figure prominently. No one knows why.
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  Hortensia

  no one has changed fashions since 1957
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  MidwichCuckoo

  Sir82...Invisible Elves? Ooooh, is that like Magic? Because I was taught that God will miraculously dispose of all the decomposing and smouldering bodies after Armaggedon. I hope so, because it won't be a very nice sight for all the Dub-kiddies who will be the only kiddies to survive, because their Mummies and Daddies sold books which told fibs. Am I going off topic?

  Ah yes, the baskets of fruit which need to be carried around every day. They live in a Fairy Tale. Things I've NEVER heard said in a KH...

  ''I look forward to when God will destroy this Zanussi-tool-of-Satan at Armageddon - I dream of walking fifteen miles to wash my smalls in a stream''

  ''No Johnny, you can't have a hamster as a pet, that's what Wordly kids have. In the New Order you'll be playing with lions and wildebeests. How about we start you off with a skunk or rattlesnake now?''
• 

  sir82

  Sir82...Invisible Elves? Ooooh, is that like Magic?

  Don't know if it is magic, but someone has to be working in factories, producing all the stuff that JWs are using in all those new world pictures.

  We all know that all work will be "fulfilling" in the new order, right? No 8-10 hour shifts running the stamping machine there!

  Since someone is producing those billions of articles of clothing, building supplies, wicker baskets, etc., but we never see who it is, I just figured it must be invisble elves.

  Maybe it's theocratically-designed robots instead?
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  ninja

  yeah middy ...imagine the mum's shouting at the kids...."stop prodding the decomposing neighbours with that stick"!..."no more elephants or hippos for you young lad!"
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  MidwichCuckoo

  The JWs in all those ''New World'' picures are all smiling. Well frankly I wouldn't be if I was carrying all last week's laundry on one shoulder and the obligatory basket of fruit and veg on the other.
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  When they are not in their JW uniforms, everyone wears modest clothing.
  Even at their window washing job, JW's wear plain pocket t-shirts.

  Nobody ever calls Bethel for guidance on a matter, as they all just do what
  is written in the WT magazine.

  Donation boxes are for new visitors, as everyone else has direct deposit to
  the KH account. Except for assemblies and conventions- there the donation
  boxes need to be emptied several times a day, because of overflow. Somehow,
  they still announce a deficit before the sessions end.

  Every JW takes every study book to Kinkos for lamination and new spiral binding
  so they can keep the book for a long time, plus they buy a special pen to be
  able to clean off their underlining the second and third time they study the book.

  The Mormons and Seventh Day Adventists and Scientologists admit they are
  wrong, and say they are looking into the Watchtower religion.