Relationships.... (page 2)

carla

Part of the problem may also be the way women view sex. If you are having sex with these young women they usually assume you are serious about them and not just using them for a good time. After trying to help a young lady recently who's heart was broken and felt as used as used hankie due to 'giving herself' to this guy who only wanted his jollies, please let the young ladies know up front that you are only out for a good time if that is the case. Even in these 'modern' times young women are not all out to get laid and have it be meaningless. Some young ladies will think she will be different for you and you will fall madly in love with her and she can change you into a monogonous fellow. That's where the broken hearts come from, sometimes.

Tuesday

some advice from me, just stop looking. Go do things that you enjoy doing and you'll end up meeting people who enjoy doing the same things. I just got out of a relationship when I met my wife, I wasn't looking at all for anyone to date it just kind of happened. Everyone I talk to always says they met the person they ended up with without even looking. Short of that, when I was looking I would just go into the local bookstore, pick out a section of books where I would be interested in dating a person reading from that section and strike up conversations. The best part of that is there's usually a cafe in the bookstore and you could just walk to the other side of the store to have a cup of coffee or whatever. Steer clear of women in the romance section though, their expectations are WAY too high LOL.

Brigid

Try this method from a very very good friend of mine:

Get a piece of paper and pen. Sit down and write out all the things you want in a partner. Don't be afraid to put anything down even if you think it's shallow (beautiful, thoughtful, maternal...) really think about who you want to share these things inside of you with.

keep it. You've set up the channel.

My "friend" showed me his not too long ago and lo and behold, it was me he was describing on that paper.

Blessings,

~Brigid

ex-nj-jw

Richie,

Just take your time, focus on you and the rest will fall into place!!! Just in case you didn't know, it's ok to "handle things yourself" if you know what I mean. When you find a female you are interested in, let her know what you are looking for in a women, whether it's just dating, friends with benefits, or a serious relationship.

I can't speak for everyone, but most women respect a man that can be honest from the get go as to what they are looking for.

Good luck!! I always tell my boys, be honest with yourself, respect yourself, treat people the way you want to be treated and everything else will fall into place, not that you won't experience heartbreak and bad times, that's gonna happen, unfortunately good times as well as bad times make us into the adults, parents and friends that we eventually turn out to be.

nj

Nathan Natas

You have a PM.

By the way, you need a serious relationship like a fish needs a bicycle.

RichieRich

So I seriously need to stop posting at 2 am. Because when I do, I come off sounding crazy.

Here's some clarifications:

I'm not looking for sex. I'm not saying I'm a puritan - I'm just saying sex isn't at the top of my priorities.

I've never asked a single person out believe it or not. Women ask me out. I'm not trying to sound haughty here, but people come up to me and say, You're really cool, I'd like to get to know you a bit better- can we do drinks sometime?

And I'm also not saying I'm looking for a serious relationship... Uncle Natas is right... I just enjoy meeting different people, and then low and behold, there's some wierd quirk they have.

candidlynuts

i'm sorry your relationship ended richie. thats rough anytime.

but ya know, i'm sitting here grinning at your problems... mainly because if you were still a jw you'd be posting about being yanked in the back room for sitting beside a girl at the bookstudy and sternly reprimanded for it. you are however posting about normal dating delimmas for men your age! thats wonderful! ( i hope you get my meaning cuz i suck at expressing myself some days lol)

carla

Well that does clear things up quite a bit! Sorry for the breakup, sounds like you will be fine. By all means see many different people if only to find out what you don't want! Now that my husband is a jw his view of dating (our poor girls) is for marriage only. How do you know if you want to marry someone unless you know what's out there? I'm not suggesting they hop in bed with guys just find out what kinds of people are out there. Sometimes I think he thinks they should marry the first guy they date. I'm so glad they are not jw's and have no intention of getting married young. They think dad's whacked.

minimus

Why not just find a nice exjw here on this forum? You're very well loved here, Richie.

needproof

Just enjoy being single. Some people hate being single, but just think, you can do whatever you want. Besides, there is always porn to keep you going. Why stress?

Relationships....

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