by XJW4EVR 15 Replies latest jw friends
i believe my life would have been much easier for me if i had been raised in a non-JW home... i probably would not have suffered the beatings and mind-F*s that i went through... but easier means that i would not be the strong mo fo i am now... so life wouldn't be better, just easier.... but i love who i am so its ok!
the infamous one
Where do I start? I never had a father. If my mother wasn't in that f*ed up religion, she might have moved on with her life, when he left her. I guess you need two witnesses for that too. My life would have been much better, much easier, more satisfying, if I have gotten an education. I essentially dropped out of school in 9th grade, when my mother started sending me to a non-accredited JW teacher. Three years later, we found out that I would get no credit for those years. I went back and got a GED at 32 years old, when the big A hadn't come.
Philip
I know it would have been much better for me. I always wondered what it was like to grow up nomal, being able to play sports in school, being allowed to have normal feelings for girls, just being allowed to have a positive outlook on the future.
I cant think of anything positive the JW's gave me. My brother does credit his public speaking skills, but he admits there are much better secular organizations that can do the same thing.
I think my father would have still molested me, but most probably I'd have never been born as my parents met in da troof when he was studying. I think they'd have split up too if they had met.
I can't see that my life would have been better, in fact i wouldn't change much of it because I have empathy for people that I wouldn't otherwise have had. and i wouldn't have met my partner.
But on the otherhand, I would have had a much bigger family as we only had contact with my uncle who was a witness and his wife and kids and my grandma, that would have been nice, to know the rest of the family. plus i might have met someone that i love alot more because i'd have been allowed to love (if i hadn't been abused) unconditionally.
And i love xmas now and birthdays, i'm like a little kid. not jaded about the whole thing as i would have been if i'd had them all along, it would just be huh another xmas another b'day.
My life would definately have been happier and more fulfilling without the influence of the WTB&TS, which encouraged and directed my mother's neurosis.
For openers, maybe my mother wouldn't have become a religious fanatic and driven my father to leave.
I would have had association with my many aunts, uncles, cousins and grandpaerents, all of which were denied me because as non-JWs they were "demonic" and bent on getting me destroyed at Armageddon.
I would have been allowed to associate with the people - students and teachers - that I had in school. I wouldn't have wandered around like the zombie that nobdy knew. I would have taken advantage of "special placement" scholastic programs that I qualified for but ignored. I probably would have not dropped out of High School in my senior year - did I mention that Armageddon was coming? I might have gone to college and obtained a degree.
I might have started my life living MY life, instead of one that was scripted for me by a moron in Brooklyn. I would have made MY mistakes, instead of the mistakes dictated by the Watchtower handbook and enforced by Maternal Divine Authority.
I have issues.
It's a mixed bag. My childhood was so much better than so many people that I know. I am glad that I was raised with strong discipline and morals. I think that my upbringing allowed me to avoid the problems of drugs, jail, and fathering out of wedlock children. I can only wonder what kind of people I would have gotten mixed up with. There is a very good chance I could have been sitting in a prison cell right now.
On the other hand, I was socially isolated and didn't develop very good social skills. I desperately wanted to get involved in sports when I was in school, and I know that I would have excelled. The indoctrination of the WTS made me give up the idea of going to college, and it also instilled a very sick and twisted concept of God in me.
Looking at the big picture, my life has been so much better than most people. I have personal friends who has a terrible upbringing: physical and sexual abuse, drugs, etc. I think the most important thing for me is to feel grateful for what I have been blessed with in my life, as it could have been much worse.
