For women over thirty!

by helncon 21 Replies latest social humour

  • helncon
    helncon

    This is for all you girls 30 years and over.... and for those who are turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their 30's...AND for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!...

    This was written by Andy Rooney from CBS 60 Minutes. Andy Rooney says:

    As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

    A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

    If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's
    usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing.

    Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

    Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

    A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over 30 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.

    Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They always know.

    A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Women over 30 have more tricks up their sleeve in bed. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

    Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

    Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

    Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Here's an update for you... Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire Pig, just to get a little sausage.

  • deeskis
    deeskis

    haha, Helncon.............. nods head knowingly................

    here are some more gems for you in a similar vein........

    THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

    Between 18 and 20 a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half wild, naturally beautiful with fertile deltas.

    Between 21 and 30 a woman is like America, well developed and open to trade - especially for someone with cash.

    Between 31 and 35 she is like India, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.

    Between 36 and 40 a woman is like France. Gently aging, but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

    Between 41 and 50 she is like Yugoslavia, lost the war - haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.

    Between 51 and 60, she is like Russia, very wide and borders are
    un-patrolled. The frigid climate keeps people away.

    Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Mongolia, with a glorious and all
    conquering past but alas, no future.

    After 70, they become Afghanistan. Almost everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.


    THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

    Between 15 and 70 a man is like Iraq - ruled by a dick.

    Anyway, now that I've managed to offend probably more than half the board I reckon I should shut up!..............how'r u doin btw?

    D

  • freedomloverr
    freedomloverr

    great read. I love andy rooney.

    I'm loving my thirties. I was terrified of turning 30 but I'm loving this side of the decade way more than my 20's.

  • free2think
    free2think

    That was so funny, thanks for sharing it Helen.

  • Stealth453
    Stealth453

    Soooooooooooooooooo True.

  • nvrgnbk
    nvrgnbk
    Soooooooooooooooooo True.

    Yup. Dat's how I like dem.

  • brinjen
    brinjen

    Printed a copy for my lounge room wall. Love it!

  • Mrs Smith
    Mrs Smith

    Thanks for this post, you've made my day.

    I for one am really enjoying my thirties.

  • Brigid
    Brigid

    LOL! That was awesome! It took me 'til I was past 35 to reach that level of confidence (late bloomer <read immature>, I guess).

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    Thank you! I love my 30s

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit