hey blues. congrats. word of warning though, sometimes you will miss it, or feel bad for leaving, but, i can promise, this feeling is fleeting.
Is it weird that I don't miss it?
by bluesbreaker59 24 Replies latest jw experiences
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Missanna
Congrats! i know exactly how you feel. the first taste of REAL freedom is soooooo nice. but every once in a while the guilt comes back but you realize it's just what was drilled into you for so long. the best advice i can give you is if anyone from your old hall tries to make you feel guilty don't let them and don't try to explain why you left. it won't make any difference. just let them talk, they get bored easily. lol again CONGRATS!
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WTWizard
Here is the part that I miss:
>>Having no one show up for field service
>>Having the meetings get cancelled for snow
>>Those drives across town for a call out of the territory, and then the person is not at home
>>Very long delays caused by errands, poor morning planning, and other unplanned things.
Most of the things I would have missed no longer exist in the Tower. You no longer have groups go out to eat after the meetings, since they have had isolated cases of fornication following those and they took that away. That also goes for congregation gatherings aside meetings and service. The a$$emblies are all out of date and stale by now--the first time, it is a novelty, but after that, it is all bulls***.
Besides, why should I support an organization that has gone out of its way to do nothing to help me meet the opposite sex when they could have used the power of manipulation to at least make sure I would have gotten a chance? They set up the whole structure of the organization to set me up for other men. That has happened repeatedly. It happened with my "teacher" who scammed me into the Tower in the first place--he set me up with a group of men, including boys that were his cousin. (Talk about setting up a pedophile situation, gay at that!). They had me working with a guy, the same one, every time I went in service for about 4 years running. And then he got sick and died of lung cancer (after having quit smoking). Then, shortly before I totally faded, they tried that s*** with another guy from my book study. They told me to just meet men at the a$$emblies--I am sure they meant it and were going to actually enforce it, further driving the opposite sex away from me (as if they needed any further assistance in that). And they wonder why I turned apostate and why I have been missing all the meetings and haven't gone out in service in two years! Sure, they will not put it all together when the Christmas tree goes up.
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ex-nj-jw
I don't think it's weird at all!! Congrats.
The whole mind game about "where else will you go" is BS, do you really need someone telling what to do, think, feel, say about every aspect of your life? Please!!!
I guess some people just need the security blanket of a religion, GOD, the bible or any type of leadership to feel whole.
They can have it, I'm just fine on my own!!
Good Luck
nj
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luna2
While I was still a participating dub, a friend of mine stopped attending...at first due to his job and later just because he didn't want to. He came into the store where I work one day and told me that he truly didn't miss going at all. Still being caught up on the JW hamster wheel myself, I was a bit surprised (and also envious). Several years later when I dropped out myself, I found he was right. I didn't miss it a bit...in fact, I felt nothing but relief.
WTWizard is right. The WTS continues to cut out anything that the members do to make things more social or fun, and they replace what they forbid with admonitions about more meeting attendance and field service. This is probably the reason there is such a strange disconnect between a lot of JWs. They're supposed to love each other but are discouraged from having group social events which would bind them together and make the congregation feel like real friends. To me, this encourages JWs to draw into themselves and become more lonely and solitary...even within families.
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megsmomma
It is not weird that you don't miss it....You were set up really well to exit....Having friends, family and a hobby that is a career out of the borg, But, some people followed everything the dubs said to a tee....having no worldly friends, staying away from worldly relatives, and only pursuing the ministry with extra time....they are the ones that have big voids and miss certain aspects. ((((((((((((((((((((Vernon))))))))))))))))) (and I think that is not weird either)
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UnConfused
VW - once Blue is out longer he may look back at those in and reflect upon his own time in and realize there are also some awesome, wonderful and smart people trapped in a cult grip....like yourself....but it takes a while to get to that point sometimes.
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bluesbreaker59
Vernon is not "in" the borg, I don't believe, I think he's just religious, as a 'Christian', and was offended by my comments that is for weak minded people that can't think for themselves. I stand by that.
I feel that the Bible is full of wonderful life lessons, and many of these you can learn from and apply in your life, to be a good decent person. I think the idea that you need to go to a church and associate, and have someone try to "scare you into believing" is a joke. I always hated this tactic, and its used by every religion I know of. There is always good, always evil, and always some man made rules to every organized religion that I've encountered.
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bluesbreaker59
But I also agree that there are a ton of truly great wonderful people trapped, because "they don't know where to go" or "what do without their family".
I know I don't want to worship a god that destroys families, that is ridiculous. I mean did they just "gloss over" the prodigal son?
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anewme
Good for you Bluesbreaker! Glad you are making such fast progress exiting the cult.
What an insane time we had in there huh? Really good lessons learned though-----how easily we can be fooled and lose our freedom if we are not vigilant toward scams, shams and cons.
Anewme