When a Loved One Leaves Jehovah, The Watchtower, September 1, 2006, pp 17-21 reminds parents that relative shunning is "part of Jehovah's arrangement and is in the best interests of all". Page 21 tells parents that after some time passes they will get used to shunning their children.
Remaining Steadfast When A Child Rebels, The Watchtower, January 15, 2007 pp 17-20, tells how to properly grieve and shun when a child is disfellowshipped.
Is the Society embarrassed to mention Disfellowshipping / Shunning Policy?
by Gill 25 Replies latest watchtower scandals
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garybuss
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Hobo
I've been DF'd since 1975, and the society's stance on this has changed too many times in the past 30 years for me to keep up with.
Apparently when I was first DF'd, I was to be treated like a criminal and totally shunned. Then, about a decade later, my parents told me that policy had changed, and they were allowed to have 'limited' contact with me, and I was to be treated like somone suffering from a 'disease'.
I have no idea what policy is at present (and personally, don't care). I have 'limited' contact with my over 80 year old parents (how can you morally cut off one of only two remaining children, especially when she/he ISN'T a criminal or BAD person), and that's enough for me.
They may not be embarrassed by their silly and destructive rulings, but they do encourage ALL of us to remain silent on this issue so as to keep us separate, partly to encourage us to return to their loving(?) family, and to keep us separate from anywhere else we might feel we belong.
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sammielee24
I think their arrogance trumps embarassment.
The last JW door knockers I had here told me that they had no idea what that word 'disfellowshipping' was. What's that? she said. As if....
When I brought up the issue of suicide by disfellowshipping and the watchtower doctrine of hate for all the world, even your family, my own family screamed apostate. When they found out that I have been informing non JW relatives about the not so loving treatment by my own family as part of this sick organization, they in fact are embarassed. Like I said though - arrogance trumps embarassment because nothing really changes. The good part is that ever so gradually all of the non JW family members for whom the zealots have put on such a show of righteousness and kindness, are now coming away informed, aware and angry at this treatment. Of course, I do tend to bring up the pedophile issue, the financial issues, the blood and organ transplant issues all during the same discussion just so there is no stone left unturned. The more people understand about this cult, the larger the army against it. sammieswife.
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greendawn
They no doubt are embarassed about it if it comes out in the public because it shows them in a very bad light. Even if one can understand them not wanting a person to be part of their org it's hard to explain why they take it a stage further and interfere in families causing them to become dysfunctional by the way they treat ex JW relatives.
It is one thing to expel someone from your org and quite another to interfere in their family life. But even the extreme shunning of anyone will appear as something malicious to an outsider.
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Gill
Could the 'control effect' of disfellowshiping be the reason why the reason a person has been DF'd is never announced?
It might be embarrassing to announce that 'Brother X has been DF'd for complaining that we comfort and cover up for pedophiles'.
Or even that 'Sister W has been DF'd for discovering that 607 is a defunct and made up date that does not lead us to the magic date of 1914'.
By keeping it a secret DF'd individuals can be gossiped about and scandal spread about them and the myth kept going that 'we only DF or shun people who cannot live up to Jehovah's (WT) standards. Less embarrassment and shame on the bOrg and more on the individual.
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Flaxen Wick
Why should the Society be embarrassed? Members are purposely being groomed to accept the disfellowshippings as 'cleansing and refining' the organization for the great tribulation. Flaxen Wick
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OUTLAW
The WBT$ is not embarrassed to say anything within thier own organization..They lie to everyone else...OUTLAW
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SnakesInTheTower
Welcome Flaxen Wick to the board
SnakesInTheTower (of "the Shortest Reply by Snake Ever" Sheep Class)
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Gill
Flaxen Wick - Welcome to the board!
I agree that WITHIN the Organization the WT doesn't mind saying anything at all, but nowadays they are a lot more savvy about how things appear to non JWs especially lawyers and Judges.
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wednesday
So much of what jws believe is unwritten. Those in long association with jws know this. The third generation or older are attached at the hip with "mother"-I recall an elder telling me how "worldly people" coming into the org are bringing their immoral and disgusting habits , even HIV, into the org, and have given-it a bad name . I have seen in print a subtle insinuation to this in print .
Much is based on 'underground" type behavior . I grew up with this.We were all told that we may have to go underground and maybe now that the mags are only available for those that attend, perhaps this is fulfillment of THEIR prophecy.
Any org that is fearful of you viewing it's history or publications, has something to hide.
any org that is run by unwritten rules is dangerous and corrupt.
they don't shun,they have the personal right to decide who they associate with. This-is what they say anyhow and what's in print. They quietly "mark' those who don't meet their expectations and shun them .many will say you can't force them to associate with anyone.
Often what happens to those who are Df is they become sort of socially retarded and then find it hard to fit in "even with worldly " I have heard this said of those who were DF, that even worldly found them unacceptable--what a cruel and hateful org this is.