My act of disobedience at the DC (pathetic, but thrillingly satisfying)

by CaptainSchmideo 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • CaptainSchmideo
    CaptainSchmideo

    Saturday, I am with my son, my sister-in-law, and my 2 1/2 year old nephew, trying to walk out of the arena to return my lunch cooler to the car. The exit we use is a "one way only, no re-entry permitted gate. Ok, I'm fine with that, I just want to leave the building through this corridor, not re-enter the same way. Well, the "Attendant" decides that I am incapable of reading, because he makes a point of intercepting me to tell me that I can't come back that way, and that I need to make sure that I "slam the door" at the far end of the corridor so that it shuts good. By this time of the day, I am pretty tired of being treated as if I'm mildly retarded, so I say "fine" and close the first door, and head with my group to the other end of the hall. I say aloud to my sis-in-law, "What IS it with some people?", when I realize that he has reopened the door, making sure that we properly shut that far end door.

    Sunday, (today), I go through that same set of doors. And dammit, there's Napoleon Bone-a-head waiting in ambush again! This time, I blow past him, and am halfway up the ramp to the far end when he opens the door and hollers something unintelligible (nice echo chamber in that corridor!) "What was that sound?" I pretend to think to myself, and keep right on advancing. This REALLY pisses him off, for then he shouts, "BROTHER!!!". ....and I keep on going out the door on the other side muttering "Up yours...". I hope I pissed him off for the rest of the day. Lord knows I was for just having to BE there, when I really wanted to be home, mowing the lawn or doing something else productive.

    I used to think that I wasn't doing enough, didn't have the "volunteer spirit". Then I saw the kind of jobs you get:door guard (see above); holder of sign that says "Keep Moving" that you have to hold above your head like a scarecrow in his Sunday best outfit; holder of a sign that says "JW Parking", in the actual parking lot of the arena, which means that the entire surrounding area is "JW Parking"! D'Oh!

    This isn't Organization, this is Soviet Communism in action. Give everyone a job, whether they want one, need one, or even if the job isn't really necessary. And these are the same clowns that plan on running the "Paradise Earth" (tm). Imagine a Butlin's camp, but without the fun...

  • poppers
    poppers

    "This time, I blow past him, and am halfway up the ramp to the far end when he opens the door and hollers something unintelligible (nice echo chamber in that corridor!) "What was that sound?" I pretend to think to myself, and keep right on advancing. This REALLY pisses him off, for then he shouts, "BROTHER!!!". ....and I keep on going out the door on the other side. I hope I pissed him off for the rest of the day."

    LOL! Good for you.

  • horrible life
  • LiveLife
    LiveLife

    Sounds like some of the exits at the Civic Center in Albany, GA, where I grew up.

    Maybe next time you will get even bolder and give a middle finger WA-A-A-A-AY up to the whole DC?

    Live Life

  • Purza
    Purza

    That was probably his one job -- the only one that gave him a sense of "power". LOL

    Good for you!

    Purza

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free
    holder of sign that says "Keep Moving" that you have to hold above your head like a scarecrow in his Sunday best outfit

    That's more responsibility than most Awake University graduates are capable of handling. You'll notice that the ones holding those signs are often standing still, usually blocking stairs or escalators.

    W

  • yaddayadda
    yaddayadda

    You're right, the JW's and communism have very much in common in how they treat and control people.

  • yaddayadda
    yaddayadda

    You're right, the JW's and the former communist Kremlin have very much in common in how they treat and control people.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    I used to think that I wasn't doing enough, didn't have the "volunteer spirit". Then I saw the kind of jobs you get:door guard (see above); holder of sign that says "Keep Moving" that you have to hold above your head like a scarecrow in his Sunday best outfit; holder of a sign that says "JW Parking", in the actual parking lot of the arena, which means that the entire surrounding area is "JW Parking"! D'Oh!

    LOL that totally reminded me of that comedian who used "Here's your sign" for his monologue......what a field day he could have with the JW's!

    I've got to say just reading about your day at an assembly made me puke in my mouth a little. I could never do it again!

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    Good job Captain!!

    *Napoleon Bone-a-head breathlessly catches up to you*

    Napoleon: "BROTHER! BROTHER!!! "

    *Looks at your lapel badge*

    Napoleon: "Who's the PO in your Cong?"

    Captain Schmideo: "Uh, why that would be .........uh... Brother Goehring."

    Napoleon: "How do you spell that?"

    Captain: " G-O-E-H-R-I-N-G. Brother Hermann Goehring "

    Napoleon: "Thank you. WE'LL be giving him a call."

    Captain: "Anytime buttwipe."

    Napoleon: "What was that!!"

    Captain: "Uh, Anytime. You can call him 'Anytime... BUT NIGHT'. (yeah, that's it)

    Napoleon: "Hmmm, that's not what it sounded like."

    *Napoleon rustles off. Triple-knit poly pants doin' the thigh rub all the way.*

    Cost of procuring a fake lapel badge: $0 to $1.

    Value of having a fake publisher name but a genuine nearby congregation name on it: Priceless.

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