let me know now or forever hold your piece ... pipe
edit: if so, for what?
Should I apologize for anything???
by What-A-Coincidence 21 Replies latest jw friends
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Chameleon
yes.
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BFD
How about for stealing my girl friend. I know she had a reputation for being kinda plastic but, I loved her man!
BFD
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whyamihere
Oh you know what you did!
*still waiting on that phone call, .....or the child support check"
Anyone have the number for Maury?
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AWAKE&WATCHING
I was in no way soliciting an apology on the" R word" thread if that is what you are refering to.
I also don't believe in forced apologies.
With that said, compassion costs us nothing and means so much to others.
My point is that it shows little humanity to make fun of defenseless people whoever they may be.
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Open mind
How 'bout all that money you owe me?
Open Mind
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blondie
Apologies that are not apologies.
I'm sorry it upset you (implying most people would not have been bothered; not taking personal responsibility)
When an apology is not an apology
The linguistic field of discourse analysis offers up an extensive body of research on what makes an apology an apology, and the first and most frequently cited work in that area is John Searle's 1969 book Speech Acts. Way back in the year of this idealistic pragmatist's birth, Searle laid out the criteria a statement has to fulfill in order to qualify as an apology, and in layman's terms, we can say that it requires two parts: 1) regret (the "I'm sorry" or "I apologize" part), and 2) responsibility (some explicit statement that you were the one who did the thing that's being apologized for). The statement "I'm sorry that I borrowed your jacket without asking," for example, meets both of those criteria. There are several other conditions which will disqualify a statement as an apology if they're not also met (for example, if you don't actually regret the thing you're apologizing for, and are only saying you do in order to curry favour with the apology's recipient), but I won't even get into that here. The basic form is pretty darn basic: regret, and responsibility. They've both gotta be there, or else it's not an apology.
Often, people will use a rhetorical trick in which they make a statement that has a lot of the superficial trappings of an apology, but without one or both of those basic criteria of form. I call these statements "fauxpologies." One classic type of fauxpology is to say something like: "I'm sorry that you're upset about me borrowing your jacket without asking." This fulfills the regret criterion, but not the responsibility criterion, since the speaker is expressing regret not for an action, but for someone else's emotion. Another classic type of fauxpology is to say something like: "I'm sorry if I borrowed your jacket without asking." The responsibility criterion is similarly missing here, since the speaker is expressing regret only if a condition is true, but weaseling out of any admission that it is true. The effect of statements like these, if used skillfully, is to make recipients feel as if they should feel apologized to, despite the fact that no actual apology ever took place. They're not apologies, but rhetorical tricks for weaseling out of taking actual responsibility. http://idealisticpragmatist.blogspot.com/2005/06/when-apology-is-not-apology.html
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Open mind
Impersonating The King.
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jaguarbass
You got to consider where it will get you and if you like eating crow.