Do Witnesses have a Stronger Brotherhood than Christendom Does?

by gumby 43 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  gumby

  This came up in discussion between me and a fellow ex-dub buddy of mine.

  As JW's, we had a brotherly unity.....at least many of us did. If we were going somewhere and needed a witness to watch our place....even stay at our place, we had no reserves about being ripped off by them. They were closer than some families members oftentimes and we even preferred being around them as opposed to "wordly" family members.

  My question is..........did/does christendom have THE SAME TYPE of closeness amoung it's members? Is a congregation in christendom as close as a witness congregation is?

  I was raised a witness and when I got out I attended some social events in the church I attended but not too many as I was there to find out what "truth" was and that was it for me for the most part and so I can't really answer this question, but I know that many here HAVE become close with members in other churches either before or after being a witness and so I thought I'd ask them.....so......fire away if you would please.

  Gumby
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  Wordly Andre

  Very good question, I think that depends on how you treat your brother, I have always had close worldly friends growing up, both girls and guys, so I never cut anyone off in my life. That being said, I know that no matter what I believe or differences I may have with my friends they would never turn their backs on me, the would never shun me, or try to encourage me to return to their way of thinking. Do I think that JW's have a stonger brotherhood, no a strong brotherhood would never shun you.
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  White Dove

  JW's have more of a bondage-hood than real brotherhood. They are forced to be together and friends are inflicted on them, not chosen by them. Once a prisoner is released, there is no way for the other prisoners to contact him/her from the inside. I think the word brotherhood is overly used. A true brotherhood takes years to develope. It is impossible to build such a relationship with strangers because brothers know each other so well that they are anything but strangers. What the congregation has is acquaintance-hood.
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  White Dove

  It's good that you were able to have close relationships inside. I never saw it, personally when I was on the inside. I'm sorry that I can't really answer the question. Maybe I shouldn't have posted the above.
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  sweet pea

  I've been wondering this too lately. So, last night at my Alpha Course we were discussing the 'Church' and I asked some other church attenders if they considered other members to be their 'brothers and sisters'- the response sounded like a witness's: "they are closer than my actual family members who aren't Christians - I trust them completely, they are there for me whatever and whenever". So, yet again, it appears that there is nothing unique about being a witness.
  
  However, I do believe that it takes quite some time to build up these relationships and, together with all the poison that we've been fed about people in church or just 'worldly people in general', as ex-witnesses it probably takes us longer to make new friendships where we completely trust people like we used to trust our 'brothers and sisters'.
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  undercover

  Not having any experience with churches of Christendom, I can't say for sure...

  but I do know that since having become inactive from the dubs, I've come to realize that a lot of so-called "friendships" weren't so much a real friendship as it was just association with people who had something in common.

  In one way, you can compare it to your place of work. You may get along with almost all of your co-workers and bosses, maybe a couple drive you nuts, maybe a couple become close enough friends that you spend time away from work together. But if you left the company, how many of those people would you keep up with? The Kingdom Hall is the same way. Change congregations or move, and you'll find that you don't really keep up with the vast majority of those so-called friends from the hall, nor do they try to keep up with you.

  If you're trapped in an elevator with strangers long enough, you'll find something in common enough to pass the time and you may find that you like a couple and don't like a couple. A stimulating conversation may even help you forget that your in a dire situation. In a rare case, someone might even find love (usually only in the movies). But when the fire department gets you out of the elevator, odds are you'll go own about your life and never see those other trappees again.
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  BFD

  Why the "us and them" mentality?

  BFD
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  Thinking of Leaving

  really good question you ask. I have often wondered this myself and have even thought about going to another church to see what they're like.
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  undercover

  Why the "us and them" mentality?

  A fair question...and it would be nice to not have to stoop to such generalizations of "them vs us"...

  ...but to some degree, it does exist.

  The big "us and them" is not so much "us" as ex-members or inactive members against "them" as JWs...but JWs against everyone else. They put themselves in a position of being special, God's only true followers and they rail against anything "worldly" alienating anything and anyone not in line with their beliefs. So when we become ex-members or no longer adhere to their way of thinking, we are no longer one of the "them" but become one of the masses doomed for destrution.
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  Sad emo

  Never having been a JW but from reading about the life on here, I'd suggest that white dove has a point - is helping out a kind of forced thing or done out of a sense of duty?

  From my Christian pov, I'd say possibly the brotherhood may be as strong - but it might be from a different motive. My Christian friends have helped me because they care, not for the sake of looking good or because it's their 'Christian duty'.

  BFD - Maybe because the JW's like to trumpet about how much better at unity they are than the rest? (without actually checking out what 'the rest' do!)