Dating question

jond

Can anyone comment on the consequences of dating a divorced JW who is not free to remarry? In time this person will be free to remarry, until that time is it ok just date?

Obviously the dating would need to be done carefully so as to not lead to wrongdoing etc. I want to be sure that there would not be any grounds for disfellowshipping.

My understanding is that the elders would probably offer a stern warning but nothing else could happen unless there was proof of wrongdoing. Sound right?

Comments?

Hortensia

if this person isn't free to marry, he or she isn't really available to you. Bad way to start a relationship - you give, the other person takes, what do you get out of it? Jgnat said that her JW spouse was willing to marry her in spite of the disapproval of the elders, felt that she was more important - a commitment!

reneeisorym

They will probably start watching very closely if you start to date. Then she will get disfellowshipped if you two are caught alone together.

You two shouldn't date for your happiness unless she's ready to tell the JWs goodbye.

sspo

After a few stern warnings from the elders to stop dating, if he continues, according to the instructions from the elders book is to DF the individual.

JK666

To be dating a person who isn't scripurally free to marry would be deemed as "loose conduct," thereby a DF offense.

JK

XJWNB

What do you mean that the person is divorced and not free to remarry? Techically a divorced means that the person is available. Is the person official or unofficially divorced?

OnTheWayOut

If the person is divorced, but not free to remarry, then they are used to
doing things the elders advise against, perhaps by not informing them of
everything they do.

If you date, don't tell the JW's at all- any of them. The only JW's that
should see you all together would be JW's who meet as a group, not as
couples. You could be at the same JW parties, gatherings, movie outings.
Serious dating like going out to concerts, shows, restaurants- alone- don't
tell them. If you are not known as a JW or potential JW, then don't do
any of those things, just keep it all secret.

Advice given that unless they are ready to leave Jehovah's Witnesses, they
shouldn't do this at all- that is true. Unless they are preparing to leave the
religion, I would suggest that you RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN to get away.
Sorry to be blunt like that, but they will try to drag you IN to the religion if they
aren't on the way out.

sammielee24

Can anyone comment on the consequences of dating a divorced JW who is not free to remarry? In time this person will be free to remarry, until that time is it ok just date?

If you believe in and enjoy freedom in your life - freedom to learn, freedom to watch a movie you want, listen to music you enjoy, read a book without censorship, talk to anyone you wish to - simple freedoms - RUN, RUN, RUN!!!!!

There is legal divorce and according to the JW's there is scriptural divorce. If you are already trying to skirt the issue and hide a relationship because someone tells you to - you seem willing to give up all of your freedoms ...and for what???? Divorce is legal and legally anyone after a divorce can enter into a relationship if they choose. If you choose to engage in a relationship with someone who refuses to acknowledge the legalities and instead chooses to follow a scriptural ruling, and if you choose to continue on with that relationship, sneaking and hiding, wasting your life waiting, hoping for something to happen - then you only have yourself to blame when the shackles are locked on you and you can't get out. You will have chosen misery instead of freedom.

sammieswife.

aligot ripounsous

Really weird how many first time posters take up that sort of topic and then disappear

Mum

Vous avez raison, aligot.

English Translation: You are right, aligot.

Anyway, we always tell them the same thing: get out now before getting more entrenched in a relationship that is sure to bring you pain. They should just read all of the other posts on the same topic and not even have to post their own story.

Welcome to the forum anyway, you who have made an unfortunate choice.

Regards,

SandraC

Dating question

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