I treat them like any other b/s. If they try the uppity thing with me, I just diplomatically put them in their place. Some of them give me the sh*ts.
Elders' wives and elders' kids - any different from the RnF?
by Inquisitor 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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flipper
Inquisitor- Mr. Flipper here. I was an elders son all my life and I felt like everybody else as a teenager and didn't want to be different, but my dad would always remind me that if I wanted to wear my hair a certain length, "remember brother teenage so and so is watching and it could stumble him or make him want to grow his hair long too." I thought it was a crock of $&it! I argued with my dad he shouldn't impose his conciense on mine! Like that got me anywhere!? Being an elders son was hell, because you had so much to live up to, too much. I just wanted to be normal and fade in the background. My dad was city overseer for 30 years, fat chance of that happening! Anyway, now I don't have that burden, thankfully! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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monophonic
"Another presumption is that elders' kids have a measure of immunity. I think this latter one is true."
absolutely false in my case growing up an elder's son in the 80's and all the elder's sons around me....it's guilt trip galore, every move is scrutinized by cong. publishers, mostly jealous publishers who don't hold positions themselves and other elders in the body on my back all the time.
running commentary. actually discussed that w/ my wife tonite...she gets scared when i write about religious or sexual things for the public and wits read it...i told her they couldn't shut the hell up when i started writing about music and movies years ago...it was constant running commentary of the possibility that i was promoting unchristian things...aka, i wasn't a window washer or janitor like them, so an easy target.
she asked me to pull back a little bit on a project i'm working on....b/c she'll hear the running commentary....i told her that wasn't my fault and not to worry, the smack talk will always be there, those people just aren't my friends anymore and she should decide if they're truly her friends as well b/c her fear isn't the subjects i write about, but the running commentary.....actually a common trait of alcoholics.
i'd scratch my ear with my middle finger and have to prove my innocense in the face of guilt that i wasn't making an obscene gesture.....that's how idiotic it got.
then other halls were completely cool w/ my creative endeavors.
that was my first mental ping to get the hell out since being a jw and not having constant turmoil and struggle from the elders depended on your geographic location.
i wouldn't wish being an elder's kid on anyone, even people i dislike.
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caligirl
I always felt that I was under MORE scrutiny, not less as an elder's child. The night my father was made an elder, I was told by another elder's wife "Now you have to be good" (Not that I had done anything wrong at 11 or 12 or however old I was), but I was being warned for sure. Oh, and the one who gave the warning was one of those elderettes who fancied herself better than everyone else and most definitely meddled in things that she was not supposed to.
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Inquisitor
Hey all, great read! Your observations make me re-think whether there really is such thing as "immunity" for elder's kids.
I guess, what led me to that belief is that I've successfully avoided being kicked out of the Org with my behaviour. But on retrospect, that's probably because the "relevant authorities" don't really know what I get up to, what I think, what I've said to my non-Witness friends. Another thing I've to confess is that the other elders' kids don't get into trouble not because they hide things well but because they are staunch believers. Trouble isn't on the horizon cos most of the ones I know are Champions of the Org.
So yes, you might be on to something there, monophonic and friends..
INQ
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Madame Quixote
I guess I can say from experience in both fields, they're just clueless humans, like the rest. Elders and their families are just rank and file, too; it just doesn't seem so to those who aren't elders (or their families). They're robots, following (and enforcing) orders, too, just like the rest. The power is an illusion because if nobody bought into any of it, the elders and their families would be "R&F" too, and that is what they are. Everyone in the bOrg is equal, because even if the elders and their families appear to have power, they really don't; the people with the power are the followers, who choose to do what they say; and the elders ultimately, are the biggest followers. Follow?
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Inquisitor
Madame Quixote,
I know what you are trying to say. But the fact is, JWs DO believe and respect the authoritarian regime. Hence the power is palpable, even if it is imaginary. Every level of the authority structure within the JW org may have its weakness/power limits, but it certainly is no power-to-the-people democracy! I find that particular last observation of yours hard to believe.
INQ
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Madame Quixote
maybe growing up as both an elder's daughter and sometimes not as an elder's daughter makes it hard for me to communicate my experience/observation.
The elders are indeed the biggest followers of all. How could they not be? They have to control, based on some book orders from a publishing company's guru overseers. They are corporate religionists and the stockholders are the other publishers; elders are the selected few who come from the most brainwashed of the brainwashed.
Does that clarify it?
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Madame Quixote
Geez . . . my poor, overbearing, hen-pecked dad was the most guilt-complexed person I've probably ever known; and that guilt complex made it possible for him to guilt it over on others . . . does that make sense?
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Bonnie_Clyde
Madame Quixote - I like your observations. The elders only have power over us if we allow them to. We've been programmed for so many years to obey them unconditionally--it's hard to break the mindset, but it's only in the mind.