We've been invited to a JC

besty

For those of you don't know our story Sweet Pea and I stopped attending all meetings quite abruptly about 4 months ago.

Since then we have had a few ill-advised conversations with JW friends and family stating our reasons - sometimes in emails. Also SP emailed a new friend on another forum her experiene with going to a new church. That moron then posted her email including personal details and email address onto the forum for others to see. Unfortunately his post was found almost instantly by a JW friend - who was looking into his beliefs at our suggestion - and emailed it to us asking for an explanation. He also shared the post with his hardline wife who was already shunning us and who told a load of her friends so it became quite widely known that SP had done an Alpha course and been to a church. (We had the post taken down and it is no longer visible - but the JW will have hard copy) (once all this blows over I will post some email conversations)

So about a week ago we had a phone call from an elder asking us to meet with him and another elder. We declined.

Last night we had another call from the same elder, this time inviting us to a JC on a charge of apostasy. He refused to reveal the specific allegation, name the accusers or reveal the evidence. I suggested that going to a religious trial without the benefit of preparing our defence based on the details was a quasi-legal process that I wanted no part of. He replied that they were not adhering to worldy standards but bible ones. I suggested a public trial at the city gates in front of the congregation was the Bible standard for dealing with wrongdoers. He replied that the congreagtion will find out, to which I replied that a 7 word announcement tells them nothing about the rights and wrongs of our case but only tells them what sentence they have to enforce.

He said it wasn't like a trial. I replied "I wish it was - then we might have a chance to see the evidence before going in front of the police, prosecutors, jury, judge and prison officers". I also said that the only place you could find a legal system like that would be on the Amnesty International website. He declined to put in writing the details I had requested, but would put in writing the date set for the JC.

So now we have to make a choice - do we attend so we can see the evidence and the accusers for our own closure and then DA on the spot? Or do we attend and if the evidence is thin then we could try and fight the case?

Or do we not attend and not play their childish games as mentally they have no authority over us and we can remove that credence they may think they have.

I am minded for both of us to go along and hear/see the evidence/witnesses and then produce prepared DA letters. That way we can have some saving face with current JW's who we are fond of - its sounds better saying we DA'd ourselves for conscience reasons rather than we were disfellowshipped for apostasy...

Thoughts anyone?

PS - My rapid graceful fade appears not to be working :-) http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/133766/1.ashx

dedpoet

am minded for both of us to go along and hear/see the evidence/witnesses and then produce prepared DA letters. That way we can have some saving face with current JW's who we are fond of - its sounds better saying we DA'd ourselves for conscience reasons rather than we were disfellowshipped for apostasy

That sounds like a plan Besty, even though it is playing their
childish game. If I were you I'd post/email letters to all your
friends within the congregation with the reasons why you don't
want to be jws any more as well. I did that when I da'd, as did
Linda, and once the post-announcement gossip and character
assassination by the elders started, at least some people knew
that the elders weren't being truthful about why we had left.

If you do attend, good luck to you both. Is there any way that
you can record the meeting and post it on here? If so, you could
then direct your friends to listen to it.

Trev

cyberdyne systems 101

I guess this day was inevitable, but i feel for you having this happen. I'll tell you what I did and how i'd have done it differently if that helps: I decided that I didnt need to play by their rules and therefore I simply walked away (to be fair I hadn't resolved any issue's I'd had with doctrine and so on at that time), whilst it was true I didnt need to go to the kangaroo court and let them call the shots, knowing what I do now, and reading the experiences here has made me realise it would have been great to have given my reasons for leaving the JW's with my head held high.

I think it would be a good experience to see the love first hand and attend the JC, take notes and give reasons etc. I do think its important that whilst you recognise many people you know will shun you, that you speak or better write to them saying you still have an open door to them, and give some basic reasons why you have left the organisation, but not necesarily God or the Bible, making clear the two things are entirely separate.

Which ever thing you decide, I wish you both the best, its good you can support each other through this madness...

CS 101

veradico

Even if you DA yourselves, no one will know. The Society changed the announcement. Now all they say is "so-and-so is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses." Everyone will assume you were disfellowshipped. I wish you all the best. My sister was recently asked to go to a JC because our cousin told our pioneer aunt that my sister thinks Jehovah's Witnesses is one of the most psychologically damaging religions in existence. My sister's tactic was this. She called the elder, told him she would not be able to attend on the day they had arranged, and further told him that she needed the elders to transfer her cards as she was moving to a different town. I don't know whether this will work or not, but moving one's cards has been an effective means in the past for Witnesses to "fade" without being "no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses" -ified. Good luck.

sparrow

PS - My rapid graceful fade appears not to be working :-)

LOL - I know who not to recommend for fading tips. I can't give you advice sorry as I was given the DF kind of fade. Good luck though.

Personally I like the idea of showing up with the DA letters ready.

Stealth453

Bring beer and pretzels, but don't share.

besty

thanks Guys - we are aware of the DA/DF announcement being the same - it was more to do with if we get the chance to have a conversation with JW's (if they'll still talk to us) who may not have heard the announcement - ie we are telling them what has happened with us

I did the tell the Elder on the 1st phone call a week ago we were moving out the country within "weeks not months" and he said "oh - it'd be ashame to see you go without saying goodbye" - no mention of a JC on that call. The sly weasel has then got together a JC of four Elders and set dates within a week, despite the fact we made it clear we were moving out the country, and were quite happy to leave without making any further contact with JW's in the area. In fact I told him he was only the 2nd JW I'd spoken to in the last 3 months.

Does anyone have the reference Lady Liberty mentioned on another thread about disassociating yourself by your actions if you stop attending meetings? I'm going to use that in my DA letter, asking why they are wasting time with committess and investigations when they can just read the 10 word death sentence.

lisavegas420

bring a tape recorder and don't tell them. But hurry back and share with us...oh and anyone else that doesn't believe how you are treated in a JC hearing.

lisa

timmycat

Go tell the truth..and leave. You obviously don't want to go to meetings or be part of the congregation, and someone found interest in another belief out side the witnesses.

So better get it over now than prolong the agony. You dont want it, and who wants freaks like that betraying on the net, better rid of them.

Crumpet

I second the tape recorder motion - I would love to hear you tying them in knots. One thing though - I have never experienced on my many JC's (LOL) any witnesses being brought in to testify against me. I dont know if they actually do this. Mainly they just want you to incriminate yourselves. I say go, take the kids, take a picnic - make a joke of the whole debacle. They base loads on hearsay. Insist that you hear the two witnesses and they must be witnessing technically against the same piece of evidence otherwise it doesnt count. Ner-ner-ner-ner-na.

I think as a closure thing it might be good for you to go - I dont think either of yu two are going to have any regrets leaving at all but you know you know so much - have so much information at your disposal - its not like you are goign in blind and the more control you exercise over teh situation the better you will feel.

Good luck! We'll have a wee party afterwards.

We've been invited to a JC

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