Undecided...not fair

by Cindi_67 15 Replies latest jw friends

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  Cindi_67

  Imagine a sister/brother is preaching. The household is a family of "baptists" to give an example. They start giving the message and one of the members of the family likes what he/she hears. Decides to study the Bible. Before becoming a Witness he hears that JW's shun those who decide to DA. He asks: Is it Ok, for my family to stop talking to me, because I will no longer be a Baptist but a JW's? What would the brother/sister say? "It wouldn't be right", I bet the answer will be. This person then becomes a Witness, his family, even though they are not happy, would continue talking to him/her.

  My point is: I don't want to be recognized as a witness anymore. My reason is the same as many of you. Don't agree with many policies and procedures within the Org. I don't intend to join any other religion, but I don't see the point on continuing in this limbo, because I am not active, don't feel comfortable at meetings anymore, and would rather be known as one not having a particular denomination than being recognized as a Witness but not practicing. There is no use. I don't want to hurt the name Jehovah's Witness by not being fully faithful to the Organization. JW's are known by how "sincere" and strict they are about their beliefs. What is holding me back is my mom. I will hurt her deeply if I ever decide to DA. She's been thru a lot, since as recent as December 06 we lost my sister. And if we will see wrong for a family to shun someone that has decided to leave their religion and become a witness, then why should we do that? Because of this non-sense belief that someone who DA from the Org. should be considered as an outcast, ostracized, shunned, and not worthy of "paradise", my mom will just drop dead.

  Any of you have gone thru the same experience?
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  AK - Jeff

  I would venture to state that most of us have gone thru similar emotion at the point we elect to leave Jw's rather than stay.

  I left anyway. Chips fall where they may. I knew it was not the truth. I knew I had been lied to. I knew too much to stay. So I left - and I lost friends, and some family too. It's not fair - it is a control component of a powerful cult.

  But it's not fair. Never was, Never will be.

  Good luck in your decision.

  Jeff
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  JIS

  Yep my sister has gotten out and my mom is still alive. Of course my mom does not speak to my sister but she stills goes to the meetings. Funny how we make up our mind to do something and what we think will happen - doesn't. It is because there is a net for those who stay in - called fear. So, think about it. The question is "who is your God?" An organization or a God Who has given his life for you. He is not the author of fear. Just thought I would add my 2 cents. Thanks.
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  BFD

  Life is not fair!

  I have been out a long time, 1977/78. I was baptized too young, for all the wrong reasons. I was not shunned by my mom until about 1997. I don't know exactly what point I'm trying to make here but, do what you feel is right even if it hurts your mom.

  Remember, she has a choice, too. If she chooses to follow the rules of the JWs it's her loss.

  Good luck.

  BFD
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  changeling

  I think we all go through this when we realize the "truth" is a sham. Next we have to face: "now what?". For me, it's to be inactive but not DA so I can still enjoy my family. You have to do what's best for you.

  changeling
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  middlechild

  i became inactive about 5 years ago. up until this year all of my family continued to associate with me. my 2 sisters have decided to shun me based on their "consciences". but my parents still talk to me. mom said the only reason she will stop is if i say something against the witnesses. i feel that this may change though as her conscience continues to get pricked by what she reads and hears from the platform as they get more strict about inactive ones.

  you won't be giving jw's a bad name by not following all their practices and just being inactive. you just let people know in your life that it's applicable to that you're no longer associated with them. you don't have to take official action for it to be understood by the "world".
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  greendawn

  Such is the policy of the WTS clearly an unreasonable fascist like one. People are forced to leave in disgrace whether DAed or DFed which is the reason why virtually all ex JWs hate the WTS. The point is that for the dissenters there can't even explain to them why their ideas are wrong. If you disagree with the FDS you simply have to be shunned no explanations given.
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  Undecided

  I thought, darn, what have I done now.

  Ken P.
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  Stealth453

  I thought, darn, what have I done now.

  My first reaction too.
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  Cindi_67

  UNDECIDED:

  You though my thread was about you? Sorry, I didn't realize that was your sreenname. YOU ARE OK, no problem with you.