Finding a Therapist

freeme

Hi there!

im thinking often about finding a therapist to talk my burden off my shoulders. since many years i have noone to talk to. im lonely while having plenty of friends. just friends who want to talk to me about anything but THIS ONE thing.

ive looked up therapist in my area (europe) on the internet... and i found none who may know what im in (none who work with ppl who get out of a cult). I do not have any experience with psychologists and therapists... so whats your experience. for what should i search for to find someone who has experience with the situation im in (born in, married in, all family in, still in, 11 years baptized, took the pink glasses down, minimalistic meeting attendance and service, often has a hard time to deal with all the lieing, the pressure, the fear, the deillusion, feels sometimes worthless and see no solution, feels like life is over at the age of 26).

should i go to my family doctor to ask him what he might recommend me to do?

at this time i dont like to go to ex-witness meetings. its way to "apostate" for my current stage.

Thank You for your opinions and suggestions.

freeme

coaster

finding a therapist will be hard, but I would seek out one that helps rape victims, or incest victims, that is about as close as you can get. they will have to be able to help with pain.

my doctor for mental meds is a riot. i swear he actually advised me to go buy some tarrot cards, and explore witchcraft!!!\

coaster

Serg

whats up Freeme. I'm in a similar situation as you since I don't have anyone but this forum to talk to about my concerns on the WTS. Some stuff makes sense and a lot of the other stuff doesn't. I was also born in, raised in, married in, and have a child to think about at the age of 30. My current JW life is not spiritual at all. All the meeting preparing I did as a kid and teenager is non-exsistent now. I have no service attendance with minimal meeting attendance. I usually miss 1 to 2 meetings a week. My wife is not really spiritual since she wasn't raised in that form as opposed to me, my parent were really spirital as I grew up. My dad was an elder for the most part of my growing up and I got up to MS by 19 and was that for a few years until life hit me hard and I decided to step down. Since then I have gradually started opening my eyes to how everything really works in the org regardless of how my dad did his work as an elder and how I dedicated myself as an MS. The disalutionment turn to anger which turn to me opening my eyes. I have yet to read Ray's CofC but have a good idea what part of the contents is about. I'm currently not a a point where I can make a clean exit since I'm not single and it seems my wife still needs or requires spiritual "food" from the meeting in order to not start feeling guilty and depressed from missing consecutive meetings. I have seen this in her. I know it is just a matter of time.

Lady Lee

finding a therapist will be hard, but I would seek out one that helps rape victims, or incest victims, that is about as close as you can get. they will have to be able to help with pain.

I think this is the best direction to look for a therapist. Most of the long term effects are similar to what abuse survivors or victims of war experience. Look for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder/Syndrome.

Princess Daisy Boo

Hi there

I left the org about 12 years ago, by moving out of home and literally walking away and didn't really think about it, or the psychological effects of what I had grown up with and that sort of thing. As the years have gone by, I realised that one can't just walk away - the JW doctrines and beliefs are so ingrained in our psyche!

I did see a shrink for a few sessions about a year ago, to try and deal with PND. A lot of my childhood issues, with religion and the control that I still feel my mother has over my life came up and I have to say that discussing them with the shrink really did no good. She did not get what I went through at all, and had no understanding why I could not just initiate a civilised conversation with my parents about why they should just leave me alone. I stopped going to the sessions because I started feeling like a failure - I just couldn't start the converation that she wanted me to have with my folks. I just letter the drugs take their course and got over the PND by myself.

Hanging out on this website and reading everyones experiences have been hugely therepeutic for me. I have probably spent more time and bandwidth on this website than any other, ever (not even Facebook).

Anyway, I know that my situation is different to yours and I am not saying don't see a therapist, but whatever you do, hang in there... you will figure the way out eventually! Good luck!

saywhat29

I've recently started seeing a therapist myself- only have had two sessions so far and my next one is Monday. It's too early to really see any changes of course, but I am starting to think that he might not be the one for me.

My issues really have to do with my self-esteem, my issues with my upbringing, religion (of course), and sexuality and so far I do spend a lot of time breaking down a lot of JW concepts to my therapist which just wastes time- time I pay for y'know. I wanna tell him "go to the Internets and you can see for yourself." I had to explain to him issues of baptism and why it is so important, and the guilt that accompanies it, though I think he thinks its just the usual religion v. gay drama (and I don't know maybe it is) and deals with it as such. So I wonder how long I'll continue to see the guy.

HOWEVER, I will say one of the benefits of it all is just being able to say ANYTHING. I mean JWD is awesome and everything, but having a person in front of you who wont blast you for your feelings and thoughts and will take the time to listen (mainly cause you're paying them, but I digress) is so amazing. It felt lke such a rush for a second to say that, "I don't believe it anymore and I'm gay." Well, I don't think you'd say that.... And to say it without a total meltdown that would bring from a witness or a nonchalant expression of a non-jw who doesn't understand your conflict. So I say def. find a therapist and do not feel bad if you don't find the right one the first time. You can just go and enjoy the feeling of letting it all out and trust me, it feels so good to voice how you really feel without worrying about losing your family or being kicked out of your home.

Princess Daisy Boo

spend a lot of time breaking down a lot of JW concepts

But think howmuch time you could claim as incidental witnessing...

Sorry... back to the serious stuff

saywhat29

ROFL! I never thought of that!

You know I'm gonna start counting my time in therapy as field service time. Because lord knows they owe me for it... and if they can't pay me then at least it can do is keep them away from me for a while without the "I missed you out in field service" routine.

monophonic

the one thing that sucks is getting the therapist up to speed on jws beliefs b/c that seems to take a while.....but it's definitely worth going to therapy.

garybuss

Many of us have grief of loss, family separation issues with the symptoms of post exit syndrome.

Finding a Therapist

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