Deciding on what to do

Irish Rose

Today I got a card with a picture from my mother. But let me back up, so you know what I'm talking about.

I had left the Watchtower org. back in 2001. And when I did mother was very hateful towards me, and she had said some very nasty things in a letter at that time. There were a few times growing up, that she had turned her back on me. I'll just mention that there was several types of abuse that I received from my father as a child which mom know about most of it.

After leaving the Watchtower, there was a period of time that I thought she had come around. Because she had quit shunning me, and we wrote back and forth for a little over a year. I was even allowing the boys to visit with her on the phone. But then she was asking me if I was ever going to come back to "Jehovah's Organization"? When I told her, I was never coming back. That was the last I heard from her.

That was until today, when I got a card and a photo from her. It was a photo of her, her sisters, brother, and her mom. Mom is the only one in that picture that is a JW. In the card she was talking about one of her sisters who has cancer, and will only live for any time between a few weeks, or if the cemo takes up to 4 years. I already knew about my aunt's condition, one of my other relatives already told me the news.

My husband asked me what are you going to do? He is wanting to know if I'm going to write to her or call her. Now mind you, I no longer have any love or feelings for this woman at all. That ended a long time ago. I view her the same as a stranger now. I just know that she has an agenda, but I'm not to sure what it is yet. I figure that it has to either be the thoughts of loosing her sister, and thinking on how life is just to short for shunning loved ones, or like the last time, trying to get me back in the Watchtower Organization, like the last time. What do you all think?

Paksen

Go with what your gut tells you. I know that my father said some extremely hurtful things to me after I left as well. I have no contact with him at all anymore. Because I don't need someone like that in my life even if he is my "father". Why bring someone in close to you or have contact with them when they've been so hurtful to you. You can have a relationship with your Aunts without having contact with your mother. But go with what you think and feel is right for you. And don't let anyone pressure you, if you really don't want to do it, then don't.

Many Blessings,

Paks

JWdaughter

All things considered, it might be most instructive for you to simply wait and see what else comes along. Did she ask for a response? If she contacts you again, you may have a better idea on what she has up her sleeve. And it will give you a position of strength to deal with her, if deal with her you must.

I am sorry to hear of your aunt. Cancer is the pits. It may be that your mom is experiencing regret for the way she has treated you. It may (perhaps more likely) be that she is going to use the family crisis to guilt, scare, or beguile you back into "Jehovah's" organization.

Best, Shelly

ex-nj-jw

Irish Rose,

You know your mother better than any of us. If it were me I'd tread the waters very slowly and be ready for anything she may through at you. JW moms are very predictable you will be able to tell what direction she's headed very quickly.

Sorry to hear about your aunt (((((((((((((((((((((((Irish Rose)))))))))))))))))))))

nj

darth frosty

I would respond, but find out your standing in your mothers eyes. Is this just family buisness she thinks you should know about, or is she using this crises to extend an olive branch? Either way do your duty and be the good person most dubs dont believe others can be. But knowing how she views this interaction can help from false hopes and other feelings overwhelming you.