Barbie Doll's grandson called yesterday saying the his fiancée, wants to meet us. His hasn't willingly visited us for more than 10 years. The last few times we saw him, was when we stopped his work, every time we invited to come and visit us and he never has. We have lived at the same location and had the same listed phone number for 15 years. We have not known his or his mother's whereabouts for f our or five years. N ow that he is getting married and is going to have a child his fiancée wants to see us. I think that his mother put him up to this, to try and get money from us. This would not be the first time that she has done this. When he was 18, his mother talked us into taking him car shopping, he wanted a new Toyota Celiac. At the time he didn't have the balls to ask us to co-sign or for money. I still think he doesn't have the balls to ask for money. I say kick them both to the curb. What would you do? Philip (of they aren't my kids/grandkids class.)
What would you do?
by PEC 22 Replies latest social family
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Mum
It sounds like Barbie's decision if they are her kin. If it were me, I would want to see my grandchild, but I may not wish to give him money. But each of us has our own priorities.
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MadTiger
Ingrate.
Kick him to the curb. -
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eclipse
Barbie Doll's grandson called yesterday saying the his fiancée, wants to meet us.
maybe she just wants to meet you guys?
I know that often the fiancée's want to meet their partners families, so maybe there are no ulterior motives...
Meet at a restaurant, keep it light and friendly and if they ask for money,
well then you know what they were there for...but if their intentions are genuine, you might get a new grandaughter in law to love...
just my 2cents.
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Hortensia
when it's pretty obvious that people only contact you when they want something, you lose interest in the relationship. You and Barbara are sweet people so I'm sure there's a lot more to the story than you have shared. There is such a thing as toxic relatives, and in my opinion cutting off contact with them is a good thing.
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Sassy
well.. what if he is marrying a woman who is going to change his life..
women can do that you know.. soften a man.. and make him SMARTER..
maybe family is important to her.. and if they have children together, she may want you all in their lives... your great grand children.. do you want to shut the door to that?
I'd give them the benefit of the doubt..
if it is about money.. well if it come out, that is when you tell them if the only thing they are looking for is money from you, forget it.. there are no handsouts and family is more than that...
when i was estranged years ago from my kids.. for a while the only thing they wanted from me was money.. I refused to give them any. Now they are back in my life and happily in my life.. now I have no problem helping them out when I can afford it.. but that comes after a healthy relationship and active one.. not before..
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ex-nj-jw
I think you should first see them before kicking them to the curb. Maybe it's a genuine "I miss my grandmother and I want her to be in my life". Maybe not, but you will never know if you don't check it out.
Keep the guard up, make sure your BS detector has new batteries and see how it goes. People do grow up and change, give him a chance, but don't let him take advantage of you or barbie doll.
nj
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PEC
Sassy, I guess he could change, we have nothing to lose by seeing them.
jn, we sure will have fresh batteries in the BS detector.
Barbie's worry is that her daughter may show at the meeting, we will have to let him know that if his mother shows we will leave.
Philip
