My first week here ...thoughts (page 3)

MadTiger

Those who escaped are very diverse:

There is no pattern to our intellect, time in the so-called truth, "privileges of service", religious/spiritual path taken afterwards, sexual orientation, etc.

I can honestly say that it means a lot to be able to read posts from people who understand the weirdness that I was subjected to and subject ed myself to in the name of truth.

angeleyes71

Thank you to everyone who replied. I don't know any of you personally but for the first time in 3 years I feel someone understands and cares. I just talked to my husband about this. By the way, he is the "reason" for the DF'ing. He is a WONDERFUL man. He thinks the DF'ing process is cruel but other that that he is pretty objective. He does not like organized religion of ant kind (recovering catholic). I'm sure I will remain confused and scared(i will die at Armageddon)for a long time. Thank you again for making me feel cared about instead of dirty and unworthy. Do any of you believe in God at all and if so any other religion?

Quandry

Angel eyes,

Welcome to the forum. The WTS has a way of making everyone feel that they are never good enough.

I am glad that you are here. Many here are in other religions now, others may be like me, unsure of what to believe, and others have become so dissillutioned that they now believe in no God.

It will take a while to progress past the hurt part. But stick with us and you'll feel better.

LisaRose

Emy, that was exactly my experience. It took time for my full normal rational thinking to kick in. I've been out 8 years (and inactive for many years before that). When I first left, I still thought it was the truth, but just couldn't hack it anymore. Without the constant brainwashing, of course I no longer believe that. I've pretty much broken every taboo at this point except for donating blood. For some reason that still seems wrong. Wouldn't turn down a transfusion if I needed one though. So I guess there is still a little. teeny bit of jw left in me. I still believe in God. Don't believe the bible is God's word anymore. Don't go to any church, after 30 years of 5 hours of meetings a week, I not sitting in a church on Sundays. Ick. I am a spiritual person, I still work to improve myself and be of help to others. I just can see things as right or wrong, black or white, no shades of gray, like many churches do. I am happier than I ever was as a JW. LIfe is good.

free2beme

Just a thought on mind games. They are every where, in every organization and employer and even friendships. Only difference between seeing them and ignoring them, is educating yourself on reality.

Barbie Doll

Hi Emy, We are your friends, we are here for you. We well help you as much as possible.

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Barbie Doll

Hello Anleleyes 71-------Any time you want to talk to us, we are here for you. We are your friends.

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blueviceroy

I havent been here long either and certainly never was in the organization but what what your talking about ,that feeling in your brain? That also happens when you suffer from post tramatic stress disorder or what used to be called shell shock it happens to victims of abuse and people that have been through experiences that were uberstressfull and it causes fragmentation of your personoality and thought proccesses as a means of spreading the stress among seperate "people" in your mind. Extreme cases can develope multiple personality disorder and schitzoid personality .

RollerDave

Emy,

Welcome!

I have to go back and read your posts, they sound pretty good. If you and NVR differ politically, We prolly see eye to eye.

Isn't that thought-shutdown process that keeps you from seeing the bullshit in one compartment of your life just a beast?

Stopping it is such an effort as it is rooted in all of your subconscious habits, the stuff you do without even thinking about it.

It's as if the WTS has installed 'antivirus' software in your brain, only its WTS Antidoubt V1.9.14!

Angeleyes, WELCOME!

You are NOT BAD or WORTHLESS! If you see yourself as a 'sinner' then consider this, Jesus died as much for you as for anybody else on the planet, and who di HE hang with? was it the scribes? Pharisees?

So-called, SINNERS!

But as it turns out, the WTS will df you for things that are in no stretch of the imagination SINS, and the whole DF/shunning doctrine/process is unscriptural. I know that Jesus said families would be split by belief, but I think it was an effect, not an order or commandment.

"THOU SHALT SHUN THY CHILD THAT HE MAY FEEL SUBJIGATED YEAH VERILY!"

Pshaw!

Don't let the outspoken liberals/atheists fool you, there ARE theists and conservatives here, we just tend not to be as strident.

I myself AM a believer in God still, I banished the WTS from my soul, but it turns out the WTS and God are two separate things.

He is still very much there, and it is a comfort every day.

As for your 'friends' in da troof, hon, I hate to break it to you but when you start finding decent worldly friends you will realize that they are the first REAL friends you've ever had because with friends like the JW's, who needs enemas?

You'll be ok, I suggest more meetings and field misery, oh wait, more posting and smiling.

There, you've got a start on it now!

Homebound, also WELCOME!

Yeah, isn't it grand?

A big rambunctious unruly, bickering apostate family but we all get along pretty good.

Except NVR ;P

J/K,

RD

PEC

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Philip

My first week here ...thoughts

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