How Long Were You In Spiritual "No--Man's Land"???

by minimus 25 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  OnTheWayOut

  Did your spouse stay in??

  Is that a general question or were you responding to me?
• 

  reneeisorym

  I decided that I was unhappy as a JW and would never measure up to their standards anyway so I would just join the world and enjoy the time I had left. I was going to become inactive and just fade away.

  About that time I got curious about what apostates had to say and I found one online. It blew my socks off and I was out of the org 4 months later.
• 

  Grammy

  I began to have serious doubts in 1998 but brushed them aside while 'waiting on Jehovah' and feeling like it was just me being weak, I even talked to the PO (who I had known for 20 years) after book study one night telling him I had doubts, he said "Sandi, do you think you are the only one who ever has doubts? I have them all the time" I stayed in until 2000 then mailed him my disassociation letter by email as well as in snail mail. I left mentally after I found my first so called apostate web site a few months before I disassociated.
• 

  minimus

  OTWO, that ? was 2 u.
• 

  Maddie

  It has taken me about ten years to really break free from their mind control. To be honest, I think it is possible that I still have a few subconscious fears lurking somewhere!

  Maddie
• 

  GentlyFeral

  That's actually a fairly difficult question to answer.

  You know the cyclical pattern of "spiritual high" or "spiritual strength" gradually sliding down to "spiritual slump" and back up again? In about 1992 or -3, I realized that I wasn't climbing out of the trough. Not only was I not recovering my "joy" and "faith," I didn't care whether I recovered or not. And yet the possibility that I was not in the true religion didn't occur to me. I didn't know enough about either comparative religion or psychology to make that assessment. Doctrinally, I thought the JW's were superior, and the brothers didn't treat me all that badly.

  In '94, we missed the convention - a sign of dire "spiritual illness" - and I didn't care. About that time, we quit meetings altogether.

  In '95, I read Hassan's Combatting Cult Mind Control. I recognized patterns of cult thinking - not in the Spoof, but in myself. "Well," I thought, "my religion may not be a cult, but I am reacting as if it is! I'm going to have to leave Jehovah's witnesses to be any use to God at all."

  Three weeks later, I was out.

  GentlyFeral
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  OTWO, that ? was 2 u.

  When you are so busy starting new threads, you don't really get to know the posters.
  Any other regulars could tell you that I am a fader and my wife is an active JW. I don't
  say it worked out in my wife's case that foreign language freed her mind- she already spoke
  the foreign language, but I struggled with it.

  Minimus, we all come here for our own reasons. I try to learn a bit about a poster before I
  give any opinions of advice. We all forget things and there are huge numbers of posters here,
  so I often have to look back at their profile or their posts. Granted, you aren't giving me advice
  here, but you always seem to just want to keep these trivial threads alive with more questions.

  There's nothing wrong with your inquisitive nature. Ask all the questions you want, but I don't
  see that your daily questions really do any good unless you try to learn something about those
  that participate.

  Sorry to lash out at ya, but I have been here for a year, and I am the #3 poster for the last year
  (just ahead of you). I can tell you something about the top 10 posters. As for myself, 19 of the
  threads I started were clearly about my fade or my situation with my wife. Apparently, that
  totally escaped your notice over the past year.

  As busy as Blondie was with her WT Comments, or as much as nvr (#1 poster) types here, I bet
  they could have answered that question.

  I know you are a proud grandpa who faded by walking away. Thanks for paying attention.
• 

  changeling

  Found out about the UN involvement and stopped FS right away. Could not, in good conscience, teach others about a hypocritical religion. Took seven months to finally quit all meeting attendance. Fade is going well.

  changeling
• 

  minimus

  OTWO, I deeply apologize for offending you. At the moment of the question, I didn't remember your situation.

  But don't feel too bad, I recently got a pm telling me that all these years, a certain poster thought I was a woman. (Must be those endless questions, huh?) And another told me that they never knew I was an elder for many years.

  What I do remember about you is that you tend to get pissed easily with moi. See, I do pay attention to some things.
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  But don't feel too bad, I recently got a pm telling me that all these years, a certain poster thought I was a woman. (Must be those endless questions, huh?) And another told me that they never knew I was an elder for many years.

  I am not really mad at you. I don't care if people remember who was an elder or MS or Bethelite.
  I suppose we shouldn't be concerned if newbies or people who haven't posted much in months
  know anything about us. But regular heavy posters should be there for each other. They should
  know something about each other. OR with poor memories, they should be able to look back
  before being inquisitive.

  Not to offend any of you, but to make a point, would you ask the following:

  Restrangled, have you ever tried to help any family in the JW's to know the real truth?
  Purplesofa, do you have family in the JW religion?
  Dedpoet, is your wife a JW?
  R.F., are you dating anyone JW or not?
  Open Mind, do you have kids?
  Nvrgnbk, what does that mean? Do you attend ANY meetings?
  DannyHaszard, what are you upset at the WTS for?

  You must have started over 300 threads in the year I have been here. I don't think we need to
  just keep throwing idle conversation out there. We need to support each other.

  What I do remember about you is that you tend to get pissed easily with moi. See, I do pay attention to some things.

  You got me there. One time, you challenged my comments just to make a thread interesting.
  One time you said you could tell me where to go on my visit to NYC, and when I asked where,
  you PM'ed me a link to a generic NYC site. Anther time, we debated about judicial committees.
  We don't see eye-to-eye, and we don't need to. I guess I wish you would just be more of a
  friend instead of just the red dot that asks a bunch of questions then moves on to more questions.
  I admit I stirred things up between us more than you did. I am able to put that in my past, as I will
  with this thing on this thread that I stirred up. I am sorry if it seems I attacked unprovoked because
  you don't remember stuff about me. You don't have to.