How do I flirt, not acting desperate at the same?

tsunami_rid3r

First I'll blame the fact that growing up as a witness, it was hard flirting with girls. Most of my younger days were spent at congregation gatherings, and it was hard trying to go up and talk to the girls. Both parents had to know about it, and it was quite a serious issue. Now I'm still working on my skills, and I don't know what kind of vibe I let off. I want to give off the vibe where I'm seductive, like I want you baby, lets make love as Chef would say. How do I do that without coming off as being desperate?

sweetface2233

Rule # 1 - Smile at her. Babes love a nice smile.

Rule # 2 - Make eye contact. Nothing says "come here baby" like a set of peepers locking.

Rule # 3 (the MOST important) - Ask her questions about herself. Women love to be the center of attention and asking her questions will let her know you are truly interested.

Anything after that will come naturally. Just be yourself and relax. Women can sense when men are nervous around them. When you act comfortable w/ them, then are going to be comfortable w/ you.

I hope this helped!

ex-nj-jw

You can't make love if you are not in love with the person. There is a big difference between "making love" and having sex. I don't have a problem with just having sex (if you are not in a committed relationship). But I do suggest you be yourself, get to know her (you know couple dates) have some fun and let things happen naturally.

When you fall in love and have a committed relationship sex is a whole other ball game! Much more intense.

Just my 2cents!

nj

Paralipomenon

Women smell fear, carry a raw steak that you can toss to buy a few extra seconds of escape time.

Seriously though, sweetface has some good suggestions but you run the danger of entering the dreaded friend zone. Pay a few complements but make sure they are not cheesy, insincere or out of place.

It will show you are interested in being more than just friends and that you are observant and what aspects are important to you.

Most importantly, just do it. True confidence is something that's grown, not given. Try it out, if you fail, you fail and can move on. It's not a bank merger that needs to be executed perfectly. Each failure is a step towards a success.

JK666

sweetface has some great advice. Use it!

JK

Open mind

I feel for you tsunami_rid3r,

Growing up as a JW definitely hampers your ability to interact normally with those gorgeous possessors of the XX chromosome pairing.

Sweetface's advice sounds like a lot of what I've read before. The hard part is doing it.

When you act comfortable w/ them, then are going to be comfortable w/ you.

Let me tell you Sweetface, when I was a young, horny, male JW, I probably would have had about as much success applying that advice as a mother giving birth trying to take the Doc's advice to "relax". Looks good on paper. Much harder in real life.

Still good advice though I think. Glad I'm not in the Dating Pool having to try to apply it.

Open Mind

Bobbi

Para, you are killing me!!!!!

Bobbi

sweetface2233

When you act comfortable w/ them, then are going to be comfortable w/ you.
Let me tell you Sweetface, when I was a young, horny, male JW, I probably would have had about as much success applying that advice as a mother giving birth trying to take the Doc's advice to "relax". Looks good on paper. Much harder in real life.

Open Mind - there is a keyword in my sentence...ACT!!!

White Dove

The dreaded "friend zone?" If you aren't friendly with me I won't give you the time of day! Just be friendly and DON'T act like you are eying a steak dinner. Maybe you are looking for a fuck buddy. Trust for a long lasting relationship is built in the "friend zone." Must be friends for it to last. What, friends can't have sex??? Who made that rule? FWB.

jgnat

tsunami_rdr, in all your posts I have never got the sense that you are at all interested in the people you meet. It's more for what they can do for you, isn't it? I think you need a girl-friend. A fine, platonic relationship where you discover a whole bunch of things that the two of you have in common. After spending about ten hours or so with her, you should be able to tell me what her favorite flavour of ice-cream is, her greatest fears, hopes and ambitions. What is her greatest childhood memory? Pet peeves? Talents?

I think you first have to acknowledge you are dealing with interesting PEOPLE.

THEN we can move on to your other problems with girls.

How do I flirt, not acting desperate at the same?

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