Someone related a story to me a couple of months ago… over the last few days it sunk in.
There was a time it was so easy for me to get mad and angry and virtually meditate on how the Organization systematically stripped me and so many of my loved ones of their life…the life that could have been. Real love was replaced with a recipe of what love is, putting “God” first and then defining what the perception of God was supposed to be, to include a group of men directed by a corporation that decides who we can or cannot speak to, as well as who we can or cannot love in the common sense of the word. Love was changed into a method of control. The normal expressions of love were basically stacked up and socked away, reserved only for those following the direction of the Society. Disagree with something, and the people you value the most take away the only thing that matters, love and support. The instructions are clear…do not discuss anything with non believers, for those who leave the group, do not even say a greeting. Not even a hello from your family. If you find out about a loved one passing away, it is from someone not related to you or at the least, not a part of the group you were in.
Once your eyes are opened to the truth about The Truth, you are faced with a choice. Either you can ignore what you know now in your heart and act like you still believe in The Society, or you can make decisions based on your knowledge, and lose every friend and family member you have in The Truth.
Back to the story that was shared with me. A friend of mine had an abusive father. Abusive as in he’s lucky to even be here. His dad went to prison when this man was 15, for murder, premeditated. Now this friend of mine is 30, and considered to be a successful business owner. His father was released about a year ago, and recently they had a conversation which went something like this.
Dad: What the hell is your problem, why are you so pissed at me?
Son: Because you f*cked up my life.
Dad: How’s that? You seem to be doing well?
Son: Yea, that’s just it, it all appearance. I fake everything, I’ve been through so much sh*t that no one will ever understand and no matter how good I do it will never be good enough to offset the crap you’ve done to me. I’m nowhere near happy.
Dad: That’s your problem, not mine. If you aren’t happy and you keep on doing the same thing, how is it my fault? Do whatever, don’t speak to me, hate me, whatever, but if you aren’t happy and you are healthy and can do something about it, don’t let me get in your way. Forget me and go be happy. If you know what’s wrong, then fix it.
Son: (nothing)
He told me that after he was done being mad, he realized his father was right. Since he KNEW what was bothering him, he had the responsibility to either make changes or shut up about it, because his life is in his own hands now.
It makes sense to me. There was a time that I couldn’t stop thinking about the organization and how to “help” as many people as I could. I read so much that I can’t remember doing anything else for the better part of a year. Then one day it hit me that I was getting worse and not better. I had to walk away from it. I went from posting on the forums almost hourly to once every few months. So little in fact, I lost my login information several times.
Now I’m back again, reading and posting more often, but it’s much healthier for my life these days. I’m not hanging around hoping to help pull someone out, but instead if someone says something that catches my eye and I think my smart mouth might do a little good…I shoot it off.
But I also refuse to let them take the rest of my life. If we give up the things we want, the way we want to feel every day because we are just as consumed with being anti-org as we were being pro-org…the end result is the same. They claim another victim. A life is not lived as it could be because of disillusioned old men who think they are the mouthpieces of God.
The best revenge is a life well lived.