I will tell a story about something that happened.
"This father with 3 children gets on the bus..."
"This woman cuts in front of me in a line..."
The person receiving the story gets to a point and tries to stereotype the character I am describing.
"Was he white?" "Was she Asian?"
I say it doesn't matter. They want to know, anyway.
I don't assume they are racist. They just try to picture the person, and start off with the stereotypical
description. It sounds wierder if they say, "What color was he?" or "What ethnicity [race] was she?"
On the flip side, people try to pin me as racist if I describe someone in my story.
"This Asian lady, I think she was Korean, cuts in front of me in a line...."
They ask, "What does her being Korean have to do with her cutting in front of you?"
"Nothing, I am just relating the story."
So yes, we need to lighten up on people. Don't look for racism in a statement.
Even seemingly racist statements are often just ignorance.
The famous lines that reveals some disturbance around people who are different is:
I have friends who are {black, Asian, gay, Methodist}.
There's a {black, Spanish, Asian, Indian} family I have had in my house.
I work with a {white, black, Haitian, Chinese, whatever} person. S/he is normal like us.
Yes, sometimes a bit of prejudice is revealed in these comments. Stereotypes and prejudice
and fear of something different- none of these is hatred toward another race. Sometimes, that
is there too, but let's not jump all over someone for making a statement that includes race
as a description, or is irrelevant to the story. Relax and give the benefit of the doubt.
