I got a call from an elder, he wants to come visit tomorrow.........

by fifi40 33 Replies latest jw friends

  • The Oracle
    The Oracle

    IF YOU ARE DFD ' IT DOSENT MATTER WHAT YOU DO, SEE HIM OR NOT, HE IS THE OFFENDING ONE BY SPEAKING TO YOU!

    BIG D

    Big D speaks truth.

    Listen to him.

    The Oracle

  • VoidEater
    VoidEater

    If he's someone that actualy cares for you like a human being, then there's probably little harm. I'd meet him on nuetral ground, though, a cafe or osmething. But...

    Obviously, as an elder, he can't in good conscience have any contact with you whatsoever except trying to counsel you, get you to repent and come back to the faith. Otherwise, he can be DFed.

  • drew sagan
    drew sagan

    comments retracted because you are df'd and my advice was for a fader.

  • Mum
    Mum

    Only a dub would invite himself to your place instead of inviting you over to his/hers for a cuppa. Then only a dub would need to reassure you that he/she didn't intend to "preach." If it's your house, you set the tone and choose the subject for conversation.

    Regards,

    SandraC

  • drew sagan
    drew sagan
    I am disfellowshipped just to so you know......

    Then it doesn't matter what you do!

    Tell him to read Crisis of Conscience. Better yet, have a copy waiting for him when he shows up.

    It's just up to you how much you want to get into it with him, if at all. Since you are DF'd he has no power over you.

    If you want to try and plant some seeds of doubt with him, then give it a whirl. If not, leave it alone.

  • changeling
    changeling

    You're DF'd? His behavior is most un-JW like. Even the elders have a protocol to follow in contactimg DF'd ones. Chatting in grocery stores and coming over for a cuppa are not in the protocol.

    changeling

  • fifi40
    fifi40

    Changeling

    I'd not thought of that...........as I said he is pretty laid back type of guy.......but your right..........I last had a visit about 6 years ago and that was 2 elders........

  • ush419
    ush419

    If he was, is, a family friend then have him over for a cupppa it might do him and you both good, maybe he is having strong doubts now that the end (especially since having a heart attack) is in sight, He might just want to be able to talk with someone, remember not too many elderly ones in the congregation have many younger "friends," and he maybe just needing to talk with someone. He probably does care about you and you can answer many ways without being definitive. He just may also be in need of someone to talk too who has proven to be a long time "friend" and not a conditional one.

  • Frequent_Fader_Miles
    Frequent_Fader_Miles
    he says he isnt coming to preach

    He claims he's not preaching, he wants to come visit you out of the blue ... and you're DF? Sorry, but that sounds quite fishy to me.

  • AlphaOmega
    AlphaOmega

    Maybe if he reckons that they had the disfellowshipping thing wrong, he is going to tell you more things that they have wrong.

    Maybe with you being DF'd he can say what he likes to you without fear ?

    Just thought that I'd look on the bright side.

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