Dating a Disfellowshipped Chick

by SonoftheTrinity 23 Replies latest social relationships

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  SnakesInTheTower

  welcome SOTT...

  SOTT:

  One minute says she wants to become a citizen, the next minute I tell her that if she does that as an American I would expect her to salute the flag and especially vote if she naturalizes, and then she talks about going back to her own country!!

  The problem here is two fold. First, you have a poor attitude toward women in that you want to control them, as has already been pointed out.

  Secondly, why does she want to date you? Is it really because she loves you, or is it that she wants that precious K-1 visa, followed by the temporary residency status, then permanent residency status...and eventually US citizenship..that most precious world commodity. Watch out and tread carefully.

  Before anyone throws stones at me...I am taking the newbie's story at face value...and criticizing his attitude NOT the story... and also sending up a red flag about her intentions. I know of what I speak...I almost married a girl from overseas...I will never know for certain her true intentions...I felt she was being genuine, but I can never know.

  Hang around the board SOTT...learn a little about your potential future mate and what the JWs demand of her...her loyalty will always be divided between you and the JWs.

  Snakes ()
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  SonoftheTrinity

  Expect her to vote...yeah that is arrogant...but everything else...she already had kids so she can stay regardless. I would just feel guilty bringing in one more politically apathetic immigrant into the birthright that my forefathers gave their lives for...I'm no nativist...quite the opposite...its just that I worry about the direction my country is going...
• 

  serendipity

  It appears the two of you have radically different values and you don't respect her values. It's best to just move on and find someone who thinks like you.
• 

  Uzzah

  I hear there is a militia group in the dakotas just looking for recruits. You'd fit in well.

  Part of being American (dual citizen here) is respecting the CHOICE and CONSCIENCE of others. You seem intent on forcing yours on someone you claim to love.

  Love means accepting the differences and appreciating the person because of the differences. You are either very young or very easily suckered in to propaganda.

  I think you'd both be better off alone while you both rethink your belief systems.

  Uzzah
• 

  sweetstuff

  I try to engage her about these things and she won't debate me! Why don't JWs debate, without debate, there would be no civilization!!!

  Perhaps its the way you 'debate'? I dated a guy whose idea of 'debate' would always end up in a fight if you didn't agree with his opinion, which to him, was right, no debate. It was more of a, "I'm going to show you why I am right conversation" versus an openminded debate on both ends. And he wonders why I dumped him?
• 

  betterdaze

  Welcome, SonoftheTrinity.
  
  Unless it's just for sex, I don't understand why anyone would want to get involved
  with another so culturally, politically and religiously incompatible.
  
  But then if she's a non-American with a bunch of kids, that says a lot.
  
  Take note that if you marry her, she may decide to "return to Jehovah." You'll
  get stuck supporting some other man's kids who will be taught that you are
  deserving of death at Armageddon, and by your very own wife, no less.
  
  ~Sue
• 

  SonoftheTrinity

  That's a great point you brought up, better of days...After my last would be marriage I swore that I would only marry in an Orthodox Church, and I'm standing by it. I don't mind raising another man's kids, as long as there is a spiritual unity between me and the woman. Here there isn't, and I need to give her space to heal from the cult and mature as a believer before it can reach another level.
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  See, ya worked that out in just over 2 hours.

  Go ahead and tell us who you are going to vote for, and why we are all
  stupid if we don't agree with you.

  I bet it ain't Hillary. Maybe you like Mitt Romney?

  Also, what should we do about the illegal immigrants?
• 

  erynw

  politically apathetic immigrant

  This is how you describe the woman you say you are in love with?

  I'm in love with her but the patriot in me loathes her.

  Seems your patriotism is wining out over your desire to be with this young woman. You will always have this mindset and I can't see you having any respect for her even if she does everything that you are demanding of her. Do her a favor and let her go.
• 

  Twitch

  Hey buddy, Let her go. She deserves someone who respects her.