Three Sisters Came by the house yesterday

by purplesofa 18 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  purplesofa

  I saw a car pull up in the driveway. I was at my computer trying to order some tickets from Ticketmaster, having a hard time with some details.

  Then I saw one sister, two then three get out of the car......up to my door.

  I had a towel on my head (just got done coloring my hair) new clothes pulled out in the living room for my Grand daughter, she was laid out of the sofa watching Hannah Montana.........I looked like hell. They, of course, all dressed up.

  It was around two, and I figure they had been out in service and was finishing up their time. I Live fairly close to the KH. I stepped outside, when usually I invite them in.

  The visit was annoying. We caught up on a few things. Not one thing was ever said about spiritual things, no mags, no scriptures, no news, nothing. We miss you Sister purps, we love you Sister purps. One sister said for me to call her if I ever needed a ride to the meetings!!!!

  They were uninvited, unannounced, at the time very unwanted. I was friendly, but short.

  It's obvious now, almost three years of no meeting attendance, I don't want to hear what they have to say. I am now a sister that no longer goes to meetings. For a long time I was dealing with problems and it was quite understandable why I was not attending. I asked no discovery questions, how is so-and-so, whats new, etc, etc.

  The only thing that was said, when I mentioned about being tired and stressed from work, that there was something in next weeks daily text!!!

  I felt so distant from them as never before. At one time, I had given one of the sister her rides to the Assemblies in Memphis, another sister was quite close to as she helped me to get a job working for the State, and the third sister, I have had lunch with her while out in service as we worked together some. We all were in the same book study group at one time or another.

  For some reason, I feel like a contact from an elder will be coming next. I think they will get a report of the visit and my not coming to meetings and the reason will need to be addressed. I hope they don't push the envelope, but if they do, I have decided that I will DA myself, explaining all the issues I have. There will be no doubt I have turned apostate. I just feel that next step is coming.

  purps
• 

  eclipse

  (((((Leslie)))))

  I hate it that they never have the courtesy to call, they just show up unannounced!!
• 

  lisavegas420

  I asked my JW mom once if I could stop by and see her, she said "call first." I almost laughed out loud.

  Several months ago...I sent my husband to the door to tell the JW's I wasnt' up for a visit and they should call first. They haven't been back.

  lisa
• 

  purplesofa

  Its a crying shame what the organization has done to its people.

  If you are single, I think its a bit more difficult. You are excluded from so much socially. So you mostly see people, only at meetings or in service.

  Do you ever hear a witness talk about another witness as being a really good friend? Or she/he was/is my best friend? Or she/he has been a really good friend to me.

  Now that I have made some real friends, its just so different.

  I am sure that is what that nagging lonliness I felt for so many years......never being able to be myself, always on, never can do enough, everything was conditional........always feeling judged. No matter what was going on personally, it was a sign of the last days, but never a real solution to the problems. Life was just going to suck no matter what kind of mentality.

  As I stood there talking to those women, I thought to myself, who was the woman (myself) that used to spend time with them and fool myself thinking that is what I really wanted to be doing, who I wanted to be with?

  And How absolutely annoying it is to have unexpected company.

  purps
• 

  R.Crusoe

  Funny, same thing happened to me! I gave them all one for the road and they went away blushing but with contented smiles on their faces.
• 

  purplesofa

  I gave them all one for the road and they went away blushing but with contented smiles on their faces.

  one what?
• 

  LeslieV

  It is amazing how disconnected you become. I saw a sister last weekend that really was my best friend. I felt sad, but also felt nothing. I have been out 9 years, so now I don't really know them any longer. Just weird.

  Leslie
• 

  mentalclearness

  I hear ya sista! I had coffee with an old JW friend and while I was very interested in her life and she was in mine I found that are perspectives are so completely different now that it was irritating to talk with her. I mean, she's still waiting waiting waiting...for god to fix all her problems while she does nothing and sighs in the background.....I guess I've realized I've moved beyond that and she has not. Such a sad thing.

  I hardly ever open my door for unexpected company unless it's family....
• 

  Gopher

  Purps,

  That was an odd visit, maybe a way to keep their feel service time running? Maybe nothing will come of it. Of course you don't need to answer the door any time they come calling (especially with your hair in a towel, geez). It depends on how you want to play it.

  But you're right about the loneliness factor in a congregation. Unless you're tight with one of the prominent families in the hall, you'll get left out a lot.

  As far as JW's having "best friends", I heard that once in a while. But mostly, people are disconnected from each other, or are afraid to get best friends because you're risking that you're getting too close to someone, and as you know, anyone can become "weak" or "leave the truth" at any time. So it's better for a JW not to get too close to any of the "friends". They cannot be fully trusted.
• 

  llbh

  HI PS,

  You say that if you are single it must be easier, this is not experience. My younger son, 11 non JW, and I never get invited to anything in the cong, my wife and JW daughter get invited to many things, It is as if me an my son no longer exist, For example last night, there was a dance for all in the cong, I taxied my daughter and friend there and back. We now exist as two families, separated by a belief system that puts 'the family first'/ My young son get is hurt by this situation, but likes us all being together. I think many people with believing spouses here have similar experiences

  regards llbh