"puppets"
You know, I never thought about jw being treated like that. But as I see it, I have a visual of that. No one really acts or behaves on their own.
How I handled Child Abuse cases when I was an Elder (1996-2006)
by slmdf 89 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse
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martinwellborne
1.)if it's not legally mandatory to notify authorities, DON'T; 2.) if it is legally mandatory to notify authorities, you must do so and should do so by calling from a pay phone and do not give your name, religion, contact info, how you found out about it, etc.????????????????????????????
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fluff* me
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gumby
Slmdf, a refreshing thread long overdue
Thank you for sharing this. Frankly, i'm surprized there has not been more threads such as this one in view of the fact that there have been endless discussions about pedophilia being covered up by Jehovah's Witnesses on this site. Unless I've missed it, I cannot recall a more diffinitive description of how the service department directs elders in handling cases of molestations within the congregations. I'm also surprised there has not been more input in this thread by former elders here, who have dealth with cases of molestations and have called the society and have heard the same instuctions from them as the ones you related to us.
I'd like to ask.....did elders usually give instructions to the witness parents of the victim such as NOT to mention this to anyone else? If so, where are these instructions found? Is it in a B.O.E. letter? If I'm not mistaken, you cannot find these instructions in the "Pay attention to the Flock" manuels. Are most elders familiar with the same guidlines as the ones you mentioned the service department gave you?
Gumby
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BluesBrother
Excellent thread. Thank you simdf. ...................Somebody said at the beginning
You say you followed the rules but didn't your conscience kick in? What if it had been your child. I thank your for the input but I still wonder how people can be so controlled.I was a JW too and never would have let this crap go.
I wonder if the difference is J W thinking and "elder thinking" . I served for many years, fortunately without having this to deal with . When one is an elder the only answer that matters is the one that says "The Society say......" You see yourself as an agent of The Society and always do as they direct. Even in small things my family had the freedom to say and do things, that because I was an elder, I did not. A Circuit Overseer actually explained to me that Elders have no conscience - they must just do as directed.
I think it is telling that cases are referred to Legal Dept. What would a lawyer say? His field is the law, not mercy or judgement or spirituality . We can see what their priority is.....
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monophonic
so it comes down to:
What Would Jesus' Legal Representation Do?
WWJLRD.
amen
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flipper
I definitely agree with Blues Brother on his points. The elders are just yes men unfortunately to carry out what the governing body and society recommend. Even if it goes against their concsience . Another sign of "cult mind control ". I never would have made a good elder. I think for myself too much ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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OnTheWayOut
I never had to be on a child abuse case.
I do remember receiving information that an older sister was HIV positive from
a blood transfusion she received before her baptism. She was very old and very
sick. Many others were caring for her in her home. They would clean the home,
cook her meals, wash her hair, etc. They were very loving to her.She informed the C.O. about the HIV positive condition and told him that she
did not want others to know about it. The C.O. said that this was her right. He
further said that this was certainly not contageous, so we should honor her
request as her right.WELL, I was an ignorant elder who wanted to follow Mother's representative, but
it didn't feel right. Sisters washing her hair could have open cuts on their hands from
cooking her meals. Those cleaning her bathroom could have minor abrasions on
their skin. While it is rare, that is one way HIV is transmitted.I and another elder decided to inform all the individuals that went to her home about
the situation, spelling out clearly that she didn't want us to tell her. Some of them
were quite upset and stopped going there. Others continued going but wore gloves.
The old lady must have figured the C.O. suggested they wear gloves. Nobody ever
made an issue of her condition or others' knowledge of it.I would like to think that in any situation, I would put the concerns of others ahead
of Mother's orders. I have broken the rules in other situations to help people, but I
will have to keep those stories. -
The Oracle
Elder training is a COMPLETE JOKE!
We train each other! We get assignments at the Elders School to teach our peers how to handle things.
There is no professional training whatsoever. It is RIDICULOUS!!!
Child abuse cases, marital problems....the list goes on. No qualifications whatsoever.
The organization must be brought down....non violently...through education.
Too many innocent people getting hurt. It has to stop.
The Oracle
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slmdf
Hey everyone! It's been a while since I posted, so I'm catching up:
Monophonic: Thanks for the note. I don't have any documentation on my experiences. I turned everything in when I left. I wanted nothing more to do with it and wasn't at the point where I would have thought I might want to use it some day. However, see my response to Gumby, below.
Big D: Thanks so much!
SWalker: the other elders on these cases were like most elders - drones. Most elders I worked with simply did what they were told by "mother" and didn't think anything else of it. If they did what "mother" said, they felt they did their job. As mentioned early in this thread. I sincerely believe none of them wished any harm on the little ones, but at the same time, they didn't think enough for themselves to determine what would be in their best interests to protect them. Elders do what they're told (usually).
Gumby: Yes, elders would tell the families not to talk about it to others. They would use "gossip" scriptures, etc. as backup. Those instructions, as far as I can recall are not in any letter or publication. They base it on the principle(s) of: not gossiping, allowing the elders to handle it; waiting on Jehovah. Bah humbug. Also, ANY elder who has dealth with child abuse cases in the recent years should be able to verify exactly the instructions from legal I've shared here. It might be "watchtowerized" a bit, but the basics will be the same. I have no doubt. But, I doubt they'd talk to you or anyone about it. It's like 5-star General level top-secret stuff in elder's minds.
BluesBro: Thanks!!!! I appreciate it.
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Tatiana
OLD FLAME - I agree with what you just said. I have a sister 56 , who was married 20 years to a creepy witness guy who got away with raping her, physically abusing her , a habitual drug user, methamphetamine. He held my sister down so hard at night hurt her so much physically that her kids could hear her screaming from the other room. Her womanly private areas were so messed up and destroyed from this jerks abuse of her she had to have a hysterectomy , and has been in psychological therapy for since 1989 for the emotional damage. Sick and disgusting.
The elders " pearls of wisdom counsel " to her when ex-husband was abusing her ? They told her, " You need to be a better wife. You must be doing something to irritate him . Just be patient. " Makes me wanna scream at the idiocy of these half-ass retarted elders who think they have a degree in psychology . How patient was my sister supposed to be ? Till the a$$wipe killed her ? So she got out just in time from the marriage, she was pissed at the elders, and rightly so. They were no protection for her.
Damn....this brings back so many memories. I went through the beatings....a broken nose....rape....all from my JW husband. The brothers told me the same thing. I must be upsetting him, as he is under stress from work. Be in subjection! I finally left him with 3 babies in tow. So much for being qualified to counsel anything but a dog. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr